Milosz by Cordelia Strube Page B

nursing school.
    â€˜He’s having trouble breathing with that splint,’ Milo says. ‘I don’t think they put it on right. His nose looks crooked.’
    â€˜Yeah, he’ll have to get it fixed later by a plastic surgeon.’ She pokes the needle into Christopher’s arm.
    â€˜What do you mean later ? Why can’t they fix it now?’
    â€˜That would be an elective procedure. There’s big waiting lists for or time.’ Blood spurts into the syringe.
    â€˜So you mean he has to walk around with a nose that makes it hard to breathe for months? Couldn’t they see it was crooked in the operating room?’
    â€˜Milo, we’ve already been through this,’ Christopher says. ‘They’re waiting to see if I die.’
    â€˜Given the extent of his other injuries,’ the nurse explains, ‘the nose isn’t a priority.’ She sashays away with Christopher’s blood.
    â€˜The worst part,’ Christopher says, ‘is I have to breathe through my mouth, which dries it. So I drink water, which bloats my bladder.’
    Milo tries to think of something constructive to say.
    â€˜What are you doing here, Milo?’
    â€˜You already asked me that.’
    â€˜No, I said whatever you’re doing here, you don’t have to do it.’
    Milo has been waiting for Christopher to remember that he was at the scene of the accident, caused the accident by calling his name, forcing Christopher to turn his head away from the cab. Maybe he does remember.
    â€˜Does your head hurt?’
    â€˜Not anymore.’ Christopher closes his eyes. ‘Please go away.’
    â€¢â€¢â€¢
    He tries the sliding glass doors but they’re locked. He knocks on the glass. Usually, after episodes, she keeps Robertson home, even lets him sit by the dryer, which she normally avoids running due to the cost of hydro. The rhythm of the drum rotating soothes him. Milo knocks again, holding his face close to the glass to peer in. He hears pop music. Tanis never plays pop because it makes Robertson hyper. An intruder must be in the house. Milo pounds on the door. ‘Open up, I know you’re in there.’
    Pablo, shirtless, slides open the doors. ‘Hello, sir, qué pasa? ’
    â€˜What are you doing here?’
    â€˜Cleaning windows.’
    Milo doesn’t believe this for a second. ‘Where’s your bucket?’
    â€˜In the living room.’
    â€˜Where’s Tanis?’
    â€˜She took him to the doctor.’
    Milo pushes past Pablo into the living room. Sure enough, there is a bucket and a squeegee. ‘Why are you washing her windows?’
    â€˜She asked me to. She said if I need cash there’s stuff that needs doing that her husband used to do.’
    â€˜I can’t believe you’re taking her money.’
    â€˜Why? Is she broke?’
    â€˜That’s not the point.’
    â€˜The point is you’re the one who took her panties. Me and Tanis are just friends. She needs a friend right now.’
    â€˜ I’m her friend.’
    â€˜That’s not what she says.’
    â€˜What did she say?’
    â€˜Take a chill pill, man. This lady’s got you real wound up.’
    He drinks beer on the deck with the Cuban because he doesn’t want to go home to Vera.
    â€˜I think Robertson feels too much,’ Pablo says. ‘Tanis says people don’t think he feels but I think he over-feels and that’s why he freaks out.’
    â€˜Suddenly you’re an expert.’ Milo eats more pretzels.
    â€˜Most of us can, like, stop freaking out, you know. But he’s feeling so much all the time, like, maybe screaming is his way of shutting out feelings. How do you shut out feelings, Milo?’
    â€˜I don’t have feelings.’
    â€¨â€˜You love Tanis. You’re shutting out those feelings.’
    â€˜I don’t love her.’
    â€˜We all shut out feelings, and it makes us sick,