Lush in Lace by A.J. Ridges

confusion.
    “I’m not interested in being your
embarrassing little experiment, Lush,” I bit out. “I won’t be with
someone who’s ashamed to be gay. I like my life outside of the
closet just fine, thank you. So feel free to crawl back in there
alone.”
    “I-I’m not gay,” he snapped back.
    It was just another nail in the coffin.
    “Really? Because you came all over a man’s
ass last night, and you liked it. You liked it a lot. That’s pretty
much the definition of gay, Lush.”
    He glared daggers at me. “No. It isn’t. I’ve
been around gay men all my life. I know what it means. I didn’t
fuck you, Rylan. We only—”
    “What? We only what?” I interrupted him
angrily. I was too caught up in my own emotions to temper my words.
“Got each other off? Is that what last night was—mutual
gratification? You couldn’t find a willing woman, so you decided to
experiment with a man?”
    Scott sank down onto the bed. “Honestly? I
don’t know,” he replied dejectedly, and for a moment I almost felt
sorry for the dumb-ass. “I have no idea what last night was. But I
know I’m not gay.”
    “So you just like wearing ladies underwear,
is that it?” I lashed out.
    “No. I don’t like that either. I was only
wearing them because—”
    I refused to hear anymore. “You know what?
Save it! I’m not interested. You were right last night, and you’re
right now. You’re not gay, and we don’t even like each other.
Happy?”
    He shook his head.
    “Let’s just chalk last night up to me being
horny and you experimenting and move on.”
    “Rylan—” he began in warning.
    “What? Are you gonna try and tell me you have
feelings for me? You’re not gay, but you’re gay for me? Is that
it?” I offered sarcastically, even though more than anything I
wanted those words to be true.
    “I don’t know,” he whined.
    It wasn’t enough. “Well, I do. And I’m done,”
I offered before grabbing my shirt and slamming the door behind me
on the way out.
     
    ****
     
    I was in such a rush to get as far away from
Scott as possible, I didn’t even see Jamie at the bottom of the
stairs.
    “Whoa! Whoa! Where’s the fire?” Jamie asked,
stepping in front of me and placing his hands on my chest.
“Shouldn’t you still be basking in the afterglow?” he teased.
    “Let me go,” I grumbled, not sure how long I
had before I either burst into tears or broke something or
both.
    “Hey? What the hell happened?” His tone had
instantly switched from jovial to concerned.
    “I can’t do this right now, Jay,” I pleaded,
trying to brush past him. It was no use.
    “Too bad,” he bit back, his expression
serious. “What did he do, Ry? You can tell me.”
    “Nothing. That’s just it. He didn’t do
anything. Scott Lush is still the same oblivious asshole he’s
always been, only now he knows what my cock looks like,” I offered
flippantly, attempting to go around him again.
    “Damn,” my brother hissed. “Come on.” He
grabbed my arm and pulled me down the hall and into the living
room.
    “How was the honeymoon?” I asked, attempting
to change the subject as I flopped down on the couch.
    “Forget the fucking honeymoon, Rylan. Jesus.
What the hell happened between you two?”
    Jamie was really upset, not something I was
used to witnessing. He was always the wacky, easygoing brother
where I was the anal retentive, overthinker. Seeing him this
rattled only made this morning’s situation that much worse.
    “Where’s BJ?” I asked, avoiding his question.
I didn’t need Scott’s overprotective brother around for the
conversation Jamie and I were undoubtedly about to have.
    “He said he needed to take a walk.”
    Typical, even Scott’s gay brother couldn’t
handle the thought of the two of us together.
    I shrugged. “It’s no big deal. Scott and I
fooled around. That’s all.”
    “Nice try. You’re a horrible liar, little
brother. I know how much Scott means to you.”
    “He means nothing to