lowered his voice and said, “Nope, just you and me.” Then he walked across the room to where I was standing, pulled me close and kissed me. The kiss was long and intense, and everything it hadn’t been the night before. I felt my knees go weak as his grip around me tightened, pressing my body against his.
Out of nowhere, I heard the sound of someone’s voice and it snapped me back to reality. I was still standing by the door, shopping bags in hand while Noah was positioned on the other side of the room near the kitchen. He was looking at me as if I had done something strange, and for one horrified second I allowed myself to wonder whether or not I had in any way acted out the sudden daydream I had fallen into. Then I heard his voice for the second time and I forced myself to remain focused.
“You ok?”
“Yeah...I'm just a little hot...” I finally replied as I set down my shopping bags and began to take off my coat. I could feel the heat rising to my face and could only imagine the deep shades of red that were currently displayed on my face.
“Are you working tonight?” I asked, trying move on to something else in an effort to get Noah to stop staring at me.
“Nope.” Noah looked away at last. Instead he began searching the room for something else to focus on.
“I was going to order in some take-out do you want to join me?” I asked sounding as normal as I could, although the thoughts I was having were clearly anything but.
“I can't. I have a date,” he responded simply. Not an unusual occurrence under other circumstances, but given what had just happened between us I was somewhat taken aback by the fact that he had already moved on in less than twenty-four hours. Instantly my nerves turned to anger.
“You have a date? With whom?” I demanded, realizing that in reality, he owed me no such explanations.
“Amy.” Noah appeared to be getting aggravated himself.
“The girl from the other day? You're seeing her again?” My voice had risen a few octaves and the shades of red on my face hadn’t faded, rather they had deepened by the new shift in emotions.
“Yeah. Why do you care?” he snapped angrily, shaking his head at me.
“I don't care,” I began to flounder. Rather than taking a moment to respond to him sounding equally detached, I just blurted out the one thing that had been on my mind since talking to Tara. The one thing, I knew in my gut would be the one thing he would be most annoyed to hear, and would likely cause him to shut me out, but I said it anyway, because I needed to say it, “I just thought we could talk about what happened last night.”
“There's nothing to talk about. It wasn't that big of a deal!” he spat as he turned to stomp back into the kitchen.
“It was a big deal to me!” I shouted, searching the room for something to hurl at his head and bring his attention back to me. Thankfully it didn’t come to that, as he spun back around the moment I started shouting. Then he began to shout as well.
“Of course it was. You always have to make things bigger than they were!” His words hit me like bricks in the gut and I wanted to curl over from the pain, but I didn’t.
“Why are you being like this?” I was analyzing his face, desperate for some kind of softness, something – anything - to show me that he had meant the things he had said the night before, but there was nothing.
“What are you talking about?! I'm being the same way I always am.” His voice was cold when he spoke and his eyes were shooting through me like daggers, something they had never done before. Nothing about the way he was treating me was the same as it had always been. The only thing that obviously had not changed was his incapacity to feel anything for anyone that was equipped with a vagina. My shoulders sank as I accepted defeat.
“Yeah, I guess you are. Have fun tonight,” I said dully, unwilling to engage in any more battle with him over something that was
Out of nowhere, I heard the sound of someone’s voice and it snapped me back to reality. I was still standing by the door, shopping bags in hand while Noah was positioned on the other side of the room near the kitchen. He was looking at me as if I had done something strange, and for one horrified second I allowed myself to wonder whether or not I had in any way acted out the sudden daydream I had fallen into. Then I heard his voice for the second time and I forced myself to remain focused.
“You ok?”
“Yeah...I'm just a little hot...” I finally replied as I set down my shopping bags and began to take off my coat. I could feel the heat rising to my face and could only imagine the deep shades of red that were currently displayed on my face.
“Are you working tonight?” I asked, trying move on to something else in an effort to get Noah to stop staring at me.
“Nope.” Noah looked away at last. Instead he began searching the room for something else to focus on.
“I was going to order in some take-out do you want to join me?” I asked sounding as normal as I could, although the thoughts I was having were clearly anything but.
“I can't. I have a date,” he responded simply. Not an unusual occurrence under other circumstances, but given what had just happened between us I was somewhat taken aback by the fact that he had already moved on in less than twenty-four hours. Instantly my nerves turned to anger.
“You have a date? With whom?” I demanded, realizing that in reality, he owed me no such explanations.
“Amy.” Noah appeared to be getting aggravated himself.
“The girl from the other day? You're seeing her again?” My voice had risen a few octaves and the shades of red on my face hadn’t faded, rather they had deepened by the new shift in emotions.
“Yeah. Why do you care?” he snapped angrily, shaking his head at me.
“I don't care,” I began to flounder. Rather than taking a moment to respond to him sounding equally detached, I just blurted out the one thing that had been on my mind since talking to Tara. The one thing, I knew in my gut would be the one thing he would be most annoyed to hear, and would likely cause him to shut me out, but I said it anyway, because I needed to say it, “I just thought we could talk about what happened last night.”
“There's nothing to talk about. It wasn't that big of a deal!” he spat as he turned to stomp back into the kitchen.
“It was a big deal to me!” I shouted, searching the room for something to hurl at his head and bring his attention back to me. Thankfully it didn’t come to that, as he spun back around the moment I started shouting. Then he began to shout as well.
“Of course it was. You always have to make things bigger than they were!” His words hit me like bricks in the gut and I wanted to curl over from the pain, but I didn’t.
“Why are you being like this?” I was analyzing his face, desperate for some kind of softness, something – anything - to show me that he had meant the things he had said the night before, but there was nothing.
“What are you talking about?! I'm being the same way I always am.” His voice was cold when he spoke and his eyes were shooting through me like daggers, something they had never done before. Nothing about the way he was treating me was the same as it had always been. The only thing that obviously had not changed was his incapacity to feel anything for anyone that was equipped with a vagina. My shoulders sank as I accepted defeat.
“Yeah, I guess you are. Have fun tonight,” I said dully, unwilling to engage in any more battle with him over something that was
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