swearing. I was serving a burger to this woman and for some reason couldn’t stop saying “tits”. I must have said it about ten times. I mean, she did have a fair pair, but she took offence and the gaffer of the burger van said it was the last straw. Most people love me there though, Rubes. The truckers have all got to know me. They probably swear more than me anyway.’
Ruby squeezed his hand and noticed his filthy nails. To be honest she wouldn’t want to be served food by him and suspected that his boss had just been waiting for a chance to get rid of him.
‘Oh, Jimmy. What are you planning to do for the rest of the week?’
He twitched violently again. ‘I am planning to drink, Ruby, that is what I am planning. I mean, what else is there to do?’ He caught a glimpse of Cali in her dress. ‘Tits, tits, tits.’
‘Alcohol is not the answer, you know that.’
‘It is at the moment - blanks it all out. I still miss her - Jenny, that is.’
‘I do understand, Jimmy, I really do.’ Ruby thought back to the nights she had drained countless bottles of wine and gone to bed in a stupor. ‘But you deserve happiness now. You will never forget her. And, you are not betraying her by moving on. There is room in your heart for someone else, I am sure of that.’
‘I don’t know if I believe you, young Ruby. But, I guess I can but try.’
‘Look, give me a couple of weeks. I need to sort a few things and I promise to help you get back on the work and love trail.’
‘You are such a darling.’ Jimmy smiled.
Ruby got another whiff of his foul breath. ‘Here, give me your phone. I am going to put a date in it. I need you for a whole day and you have to be sober and positive.’
‘Roger that!’ Jimmy clicked his heels together and saluted.
‘Roger what?’ Simon minced by them to the kitchen to fill his vodka mug.
***
Simon cleared his throat to conclude the evening’s session. ‘So that’s it then really. Lesson for today: if sex doesn’t feel right with the new love, give it a chance, try new things. It might be your mind not letting that love in.’ He drained his vodka mug. ‘And, more importantly, who’s coming to the pub? I don’t know about you but I need another - I mean I need a drink.’
He looked to the back of the room. ‘Ruby, can we tempt you this week?’ For some reason she had felt wrong mixing the traumas of the Bow Wowers with her own social life.
‘I’m sorry, I can’t tonight, I’m meeting a mate at O’Neill’s.’
‘Well, that’s just where we’re going, so come on - we can all walk together.’
Ruby smiled. ‘OK.’ They wouldn’t get there until ten fifteen, so if it was awful she wouldn’t have to bear them for long. For some reason Fi had wanted to stay the night with her, so she could catch up with her at home later as well.
***
Ruby signalled the universal drinking sign of a glass to lips from the bar and Fi automatically mouthed, ‘Large, please.’
‘Is that him? The sex-mad Simon you talk of? How hot is he?! And just look at that bulge.’
Ruby settled herself at the table close to the bar. ‘Fi Donahue, you are disgusting.’
‘And I take it that’s the Fireman, chatting to old Goldilocks over there?
You’re right, I would do him as well! I almost feel like dating a widower so I can come to your Bow Wow Club.’
‘You haven’t seen Jimmy yet. That might change your mind.’
‘Oh, I don’t know… remember when Bert was still a tramp and not living with Margaret, I woke up next to him under his mac in a doorway one morning.’
‘Only because you were too pissed to see the house numbers.’
‘Well, I can’t say I haven’t lived it. Now, I just put up with the frigidity of James Kane and his non-committed gene.’
‘Fi, it can’t be that bad. You two have a great relationship.’
‘ Had , Rubes. He just doesn’t want sex any more, keeps harping on about me losing weight. He’s got to be having an affair. I mean - look at me.
Ruby squeezed his hand and noticed his filthy nails. To be honest she wouldn’t want to be served food by him and suspected that his boss had just been waiting for a chance to get rid of him.
‘Oh, Jimmy. What are you planning to do for the rest of the week?’
He twitched violently again. ‘I am planning to drink, Ruby, that is what I am planning. I mean, what else is there to do?’ He caught a glimpse of Cali in her dress. ‘Tits, tits, tits.’
‘Alcohol is not the answer, you know that.’
‘It is at the moment - blanks it all out. I still miss her - Jenny, that is.’
‘I do understand, Jimmy, I really do.’ Ruby thought back to the nights she had drained countless bottles of wine and gone to bed in a stupor. ‘But you deserve happiness now. You will never forget her. And, you are not betraying her by moving on. There is room in your heart for someone else, I am sure of that.’
‘I don’t know if I believe you, young Ruby. But, I guess I can but try.’
‘Look, give me a couple of weeks. I need to sort a few things and I promise to help you get back on the work and love trail.’
‘You are such a darling.’ Jimmy smiled.
Ruby got another whiff of his foul breath. ‘Here, give me your phone. I am going to put a date in it. I need you for a whole day and you have to be sober and positive.’
‘Roger that!’ Jimmy clicked his heels together and saluted.
‘Roger what?’ Simon minced by them to the kitchen to fill his vodka mug.
***
Simon cleared his throat to conclude the evening’s session. ‘So that’s it then really. Lesson for today: if sex doesn’t feel right with the new love, give it a chance, try new things. It might be your mind not letting that love in.’ He drained his vodka mug. ‘And, more importantly, who’s coming to the pub? I don’t know about you but I need another - I mean I need a drink.’
He looked to the back of the room. ‘Ruby, can we tempt you this week?’ For some reason she had felt wrong mixing the traumas of the Bow Wowers with her own social life.
‘I’m sorry, I can’t tonight, I’m meeting a mate at O’Neill’s.’
‘Well, that’s just where we’re going, so come on - we can all walk together.’
Ruby smiled. ‘OK.’ They wouldn’t get there until ten fifteen, so if it was awful she wouldn’t have to bear them for long. For some reason Fi had wanted to stay the night with her, so she could catch up with her at home later as well.
***
Ruby signalled the universal drinking sign of a glass to lips from the bar and Fi automatically mouthed, ‘Large, please.’
‘Is that him? The sex-mad Simon you talk of? How hot is he?! And just look at that bulge.’
Ruby settled herself at the table close to the bar. ‘Fi Donahue, you are disgusting.’
‘And I take it that’s the Fireman, chatting to old Goldilocks over there?
You’re right, I would do him as well! I almost feel like dating a widower so I can come to your Bow Wow Club.’
‘You haven’t seen Jimmy yet. That might change your mind.’
‘Oh, I don’t know… remember when Bert was still a tramp and not living with Margaret, I woke up next to him under his mac in a doorway one morning.’
‘Only because you were too pissed to see the house numbers.’
‘Well, I can’t say I haven’t lived it. Now, I just put up with the frigidity of James Kane and his non-committed gene.’
‘Fi, it can’t be that bad. You two have a great relationship.’
‘ Had , Rubes. He just doesn’t want sex any more, keeps harping on about me losing weight. He’s got to be having an affair. I mean - look at me.
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