me.
Trent’s my fantasy lover. LOL! Seriously, he is just the nicest guy. He doesn’t have the model looks or the muscle that a guy like Brad has, but he’s every bit as dreamy. Trent is more quiet, but he’s not nerdy like me.
I’m like 100% positive he’s not gay, though. One time back in my 4
freshman year I helped him with his Algebra assignment, and sometimes I wish he’d need my held again.
“Shelly, wassup?” Her locker is only a couple doors down from mine.
“Nice shirt,” she says, smiling at me. “What’s the occasion?” I shrug. “Nothin… but thanks. Ya know, I gotta give that speech today.”
“Really? Cool… you ready?”
I sigh. “Oh my God, I’ve like rehearsed it a zillion times. I hate this… I hate public speaking!”
She steps closer to me, placing her hand on my arm, just above my el-bow. “You’ll do fine. Chase, you’re so smart. I can’t wait to hear your speech.”
I laugh nervously, embarrassed. “It’s dumb really. Boring… global warming.”
Now she shrugs. “Better than mine. I’m doing Veganism.”
“Is your speech today, too?” I ask, closing my locker and holding a stack of books against my chest.
She nods. “Oh don’t worry, I’m sure I won’t outshine you. I could’ve done more research, ya know.”
“Wow, well I’m glad…” I stammer a bit. “Um… I mean I guess misery loves company, ya know. Glad we’re doin it the same day.” Someone behind us tugs at her arm. It’s her friend Kelli. “Come on,” she says, ignoring me.
“Hey, I’ll try ta catch up with ya at lunch, okay? Don’t be nervous!” Quickly she turns to give her attention to her airhead friend.
“Okay, thanks,” I mumble. She doesn’t hear me. Well it’s cool. First and second hour are snoozers. Geometry and Biology. My favorite class is fifth hour Composition. Sixth hour is Spanish.
As long as I can get into my first hour classroom unnoticed, everything will be fine. Nothing ever really happens ‘til gym. That’s when I have to deal with Brad…and his friends. Maybe I should skip gym today. I hardly think the Masturbator would even notice my absence. I can say I’m sick, and I won’t be lying. I do feel like I might puke. No, that’ll ruin my attendance record, and I might get sent home. Then I’d have to do my speech another day and go through it all again. I’ll just stay invisible.
Hopefully gym will be free period like it is half the time. Lot of times the coach doesn’t feel like conducting any sort of organized activity and just lets us do whatever. Shoot hoops, use the weightlifting equipment. I can do what I always do—bounce a dodge ball against the wall for an hour.
5
Geometry’s boring. Who cares about axioms and theorems? All I can think about is the speech. I have it memorized, every last word. I’ve said it aloud maybe a thousand times. I can do it. It’s just like five minutes.
Then it’ll be overwith. It’s no big deal really, not in the scheme of life. It seems big now, but it’s just another assignment. God, why can’t I be like Shelly? She has to give a speech too, and she doesn’t even seem worried about it.
The worst thing is that Brad’s in my speech class too, and so is Trent.
When I mess up, which I know I will, Brad’s gonna laugh his ass off. It’ll just give him one more reason to abuse me—more ammunition. And I can’t humiliate myself, not in front of Trent. I’d die. I’d totally just die!
God I’m so glad first hour’s over. Two more hours, then lunch…
then…oh man. I gotta get to Biology, but I’m gonna be sick. I head for the bathroom. I hate this. Oh God, I’m on my knees, puking into the toilet. Please don’t let anyone come in. Please let me stay invisible!
Thankfully I only get a stern look from Mrs. Dennison when I walk in-to Biology two minutes past the bell. I take my seat, opening my text-book to the page number she has written on the chalk board. She calls on me, asking me a
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