past me again. "You sure you're alone?" she asked. I knew what concerned her.
"Yes. I checked and the rear door is still locked."
"All right," she said, sucking in her breath, "show me:'
I stepped back and she entered. I closed the door and led her to the living room. We both stood there looking down at Geraldine.
"I've never seen a dead person in person before," Jade said, impressed. "You're absolutely sure she's dead?"
"Touch her," I suggested. She stared a moment and shook her head.
"No, she looks dead enough." She stepped back and sat on the easy chair.
I continued to stare at the woman I had called Mother all my life, wondering why I wasn't feeling more sadness, why I wasn't bawling my head off. I guess it was because she still looked so mad at me, so mad at the world.
"Besides the lamp, were there any other signs of an accident or anything?"
I shook my head.
"You're looking at it all."
"Did you look at the rest of her?"
"Rest of her?"
"I mean, are you sure she isn't bleeding somewhere?" she asked with a grimace as if it put her in pain to even think about it.
I thought a moment and then went around behind Geraldine and lowered myself down.
"There's nothing," I said, and got back up.
"Maybe she passed out, fell, and hit her head or something," Jade muttered.
"Maybe. She wasn't acting right for days. I could see she was out of breath and even had some pain, but you know what I told you about her and doctors. She wouldn't ever admit to having a problem," I said. "She hated medicine and only took her herbal remedies. Actually, she was never very sick, but lately she looked pale to me often. Her lips are so blue," I added. "Otherwise she doesn't look so different. Her body's cold, of course:' I rambled.
Jade raised her eyebrows, embraced herself, and looked toward the front door.
"Where are those two?" she asked, referring to Star and Misty. "There wasn't very much traffic. As soon as I hung up from talking to you, I called them and then I sent a cab for Star. Misty took her own cab. She's even closer to you than I am!"
I nodded and looked down at Geraldine.
"I tried to go on a fast in protest, but she didn't get frightened for me. I couldn't even last a day without food," I admitted.
"Protest? Protesting what?"
"Not letting me be friends with you, Star, and Misty." Jade grimaced
"She wouldn't let you be friends with us? What's wrong with her?"
"Nothing now," I said. I gazed at her. "She's dead." Jade started to look a little pale to me, too.
"Are you all right?" I asked her.
"Me? Yes, of course. I'm just trying to stay calm and think straight." She clutched her hands and twisted her fingers a bit. "Where are they?"
"When I was up in the crawl space, I managed to read one of my real mother's letters before Geraldine discovered me and took away the ladder. My real mother put a trust aside for me that I get when I'm eighteen. I never knew it," I said. "But then, there was a lot I didn't know, a lot I still don't know. I had to leave the rest of the letters up there. Maybe you can help me get them down now. We'll need the ladder, of course. It's back in the garage. Everything in this house has its proper place and must be returned to that place," I recited. Geraldine had drilled it into my brain.
Jade stared at me a moment and then looked back at Geraldine.
"She's actually dead," Jade said, shaking her head. "Wow." She stared a moment and then she looked up at me. "What? What about a ladder?"
I realized she hadn't heard a word I said.
We heard the doorbell ring.
"That must be Misty and Star," she said jumping to her feet. "Finally. Wait here."
She went out to let them in. I could hear them whispering in the foyer. They were there for at least a minute or so before they all appeared and gathered around me to look at Geraldine.
"Is she really dead?" Misty asked.
Star, unafraid, knelt down, lifted her wrist and felt for a pulse.
"She's gone for sure," she said. Without any hesitation, she moved Geraldine's head, looking through her
"Yes. I checked and the rear door is still locked."
"All right," she said, sucking in her breath, "show me:'
I stepped back and she entered. I closed the door and led her to the living room. We both stood there looking down at Geraldine.
"I've never seen a dead person in person before," Jade said, impressed. "You're absolutely sure she's dead?"
"Touch her," I suggested. She stared a moment and shook her head.
"No, she looks dead enough." She stepped back and sat on the easy chair.
I continued to stare at the woman I had called Mother all my life, wondering why I wasn't feeling more sadness, why I wasn't bawling my head off. I guess it was because she still looked so mad at me, so mad at the world.
"Besides the lamp, were there any other signs of an accident or anything?"
I shook my head.
"You're looking at it all."
"Did you look at the rest of her?"
"Rest of her?"
"I mean, are you sure she isn't bleeding somewhere?" she asked with a grimace as if it put her in pain to even think about it.
I thought a moment and then went around behind Geraldine and lowered myself down.
"There's nothing," I said, and got back up.
"Maybe she passed out, fell, and hit her head or something," Jade muttered.
"Maybe. She wasn't acting right for days. I could see she was out of breath and even had some pain, but you know what I told you about her and doctors. She wouldn't ever admit to having a problem," I said. "She hated medicine and only took her herbal remedies. Actually, she was never very sick, but lately she looked pale to me often. Her lips are so blue," I added. "Otherwise she doesn't look so different. Her body's cold, of course:' I rambled.
Jade raised her eyebrows, embraced herself, and looked toward the front door.
"Where are those two?" she asked, referring to Star and Misty. "There wasn't very much traffic. As soon as I hung up from talking to you, I called them and then I sent a cab for Star. Misty took her own cab. She's even closer to you than I am!"
I nodded and looked down at Geraldine.
"I tried to go on a fast in protest, but she didn't get frightened for me. I couldn't even last a day without food," I admitted.
"Protest? Protesting what?"
"Not letting me be friends with you, Star, and Misty." Jade grimaced
"She wouldn't let you be friends with us? What's wrong with her?"
"Nothing now," I said. I gazed at her. "She's dead." Jade started to look a little pale to me, too.
"Are you all right?" I asked her.
"Me? Yes, of course. I'm just trying to stay calm and think straight." She clutched her hands and twisted her fingers a bit. "Where are they?"
"When I was up in the crawl space, I managed to read one of my real mother's letters before Geraldine discovered me and took away the ladder. My real mother put a trust aside for me that I get when I'm eighteen. I never knew it," I said. "But then, there was a lot I didn't know, a lot I still don't know. I had to leave the rest of the letters up there. Maybe you can help me get them down now. We'll need the ladder, of course. It's back in the garage. Everything in this house has its proper place and must be returned to that place," I recited. Geraldine had drilled it into my brain.
Jade stared at me a moment and then looked back at Geraldine.
"She's actually dead," Jade said, shaking her head. "Wow." She stared a moment and then she looked up at me. "What? What about a ladder?"
I realized she hadn't heard a word I said.
We heard the doorbell ring.
"That must be Misty and Star," she said jumping to her feet. "Finally. Wait here."
She went out to let them in. I could hear them whispering in the foyer. They were there for at least a minute or so before they all appeared and gathered around me to look at Geraldine.
"Is she really dead?" Misty asked.
Star, unafraid, knelt down, lifted her wrist and felt for a pulse.
"She's gone for sure," she said. Without any hesitation, she moved Geraldine's head, looking through her
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