short stroll. He sounded so firm
that Mother didn't argue with him further.
Jem lifted me into the cart and jumped up after
me. Mother settled herself with Gideon on her lap.
He reached out to me and touched my wet cheeks,
looking anxious now. Then he looked up at Mother.
'Hush, my pet,' she said, as if he'd spoken.
Then Sam clicked his teeth at his old brown nag
and she started trotting along the road and up the
hill. Jem held me tight. I craned my neck to see the
village for as long as possible. As we got higher up
the hill, I could just make out our own cottage on
the edge of the village, like a little grey face with
thatched hair on top. Then it blurred into a grey dot.
I was starting to feel sick from twisting backwards,
so I wriggled round and faced forward, my head on
Jem's shoulder.
9
Jem and I were both numb with misery and so
tired from our broken night that both our heads
nodded in spite of ourselves. Every now and then I
woke with a start and Jem murmured, 'There now,
Hetty, I'm here.' Once I woke first, and when Jem
twitched and started awake with a cry, I said quietly,
'There now, Jem, I'm here,' reaching up to put my
arms round him.
Then we saw smoke in the distance, and houses
started to line the road, and we were almost at the
town. On those rare shopping days in the past we'd
wriggle around excitedly and start to sing. This time
we were silent.
'I meant to tell you a story all the way to
comfort you, but the words wouldn't come,'
Jem whispered.
'Never mind, never mind,' I whispered back. 'I
do love you so, Jem.'
'I love you too, my Hetty. You have your
sixpence safe?'
'In my pocket, look. Oh, Jem, I've nothing
to give you!'
'Give me a kiss, Hetty, that's all I want.'
I leaned even closer and carefully blew a big kiss
into his ear.
'There, my kiss is inside you now,' I said, imagining
it flying around like a little caged bird.
Sam drove his cart through the crowded streets
of the town towards the big station. It loomed above
us, its great steel archway a gaping maw. I'd always
loved peeping inside at the huge trains blowing
out steam with a roar like gleaming dragons – but
now I shrank back. We clung to the sides of the
cart, shivering. Then Mother saw the great clock
and gasped.
'Look at the time! Oh Lordy, we'll miss the train
if we're not hasty. Set us down, Sam.'
She jumped from the cart, taking Gideon in her
arms. He moaned at the noise and hid his head
under her shawl.
'Come, Hetty. Jem, you have to go home.'
'Let me go on the train too, Mother, I beg you.'
'No, son. I haven't got the fare for you. The
hospital sent the exact amount, one third-class seat
and two children.'
'I can hide from the ticket man, Mother,' said
Jem. 'I can run right through the barrier and—'
'Nonsense! Do you want to get us all into
trouble? Now we're late, the train is due to leave
any minute. Get down, Hetty!' She pulled me from
the cart, twisting my arm in her haste, so that I
started bawling.
'Stop that noise!' said Mother. 'We must go to find
our carriage.' She looked anxiously at Jem. 'Take
care going home, for goodness' sake. If you lose your
way, find a kindly-looking lady to set you on the
right path. Promise me you'll be a sensible lad and
go straight back. I can't take any more worries.'
'But, Mother, I have to come too,' said Jem,
jumping down from the cart and putting his
arms round me. 'Hetty needs me so. I have to look
after her.'
'You can't look after her. You're only a silly
little boy,' Mother snapped in her distress and
frustration.
It was as if her words were some dreadful antidote
to our magic spell. Jem had always towered like a
giant, but now he shrivelled into a small boy scarcely
bigger than me – a boy who started sobbing.
'Say goodbye now, Jem,' Mother commanded.
Jem reached up to Gideon in her arms and kissed
his white cheek. Then he bent and kissed me too, on
both my cheeks and then my lips.
'Goodbye,
that Mother didn't argue with him further.
Jem lifted me into the cart and jumped up after
me. Mother settled herself with Gideon on her lap.
He reached out to me and touched my wet cheeks,
looking anxious now. Then he looked up at Mother.
'Hush, my pet,' she said, as if he'd spoken.
Then Sam clicked his teeth at his old brown nag
and she started trotting along the road and up the
hill. Jem held me tight. I craned my neck to see the
village for as long as possible. As we got higher up
the hill, I could just make out our own cottage on
the edge of the village, like a little grey face with
thatched hair on top. Then it blurred into a grey dot.
I was starting to feel sick from twisting backwards,
so I wriggled round and faced forward, my head on
Jem's shoulder.
9
Jem and I were both numb with misery and so
tired from our broken night that both our heads
nodded in spite of ourselves. Every now and then I
woke with a start and Jem murmured, 'There now,
Hetty, I'm here.' Once I woke first, and when Jem
twitched and started awake with a cry, I said quietly,
'There now, Jem, I'm here,' reaching up to put my
arms round him.
Then we saw smoke in the distance, and houses
started to line the road, and we were almost at the
town. On those rare shopping days in the past we'd
wriggle around excitedly and start to sing. This time
we were silent.
'I meant to tell you a story all the way to
comfort you, but the words wouldn't come,'
Jem whispered.
'Never mind, never mind,' I whispered back. 'I
do love you so, Jem.'
'I love you too, my Hetty. You have your
sixpence safe?'
'In my pocket, look. Oh, Jem, I've nothing
to give you!'
'Give me a kiss, Hetty, that's all I want.'
I leaned even closer and carefully blew a big kiss
into his ear.
'There, my kiss is inside you now,' I said, imagining
it flying around like a little caged bird.
Sam drove his cart through the crowded streets
of the town towards the big station. It loomed above
us, its great steel archway a gaping maw. I'd always
loved peeping inside at the huge trains blowing
out steam with a roar like gleaming dragons – but
now I shrank back. We clung to the sides of the
cart, shivering. Then Mother saw the great clock
and gasped.
'Look at the time! Oh Lordy, we'll miss the train
if we're not hasty. Set us down, Sam.'
She jumped from the cart, taking Gideon in her
arms. He moaned at the noise and hid his head
under her shawl.
'Come, Hetty. Jem, you have to go home.'
'Let me go on the train too, Mother, I beg you.'
'No, son. I haven't got the fare for you. The
hospital sent the exact amount, one third-class seat
and two children.'
'I can hide from the ticket man, Mother,' said
Jem. 'I can run right through the barrier and—'
'Nonsense! Do you want to get us all into
trouble? Now we're late, the train is due to leave
any minute. Get down, Hetty!' She pulled me from
the cart, twisting my arm in her haste, so that I
started bawling.
'Stop that noise!' said Mother. 'We must go to find
our carriage.' She looked anxiously at Jem. 'Take
care going home, for goodness' sake. If you lose your
way, find a kindly-looking lady to set you on the
right path. Promise me you'll be a sensible lad and
go straight back. I can't take any more worries.'
'But, Mother, I have to come too,' said Jem,
jumping down from the cart and putting his
arms round me. 'Hetty needs me so. I have to look
after her.'
'You can't look after her. You're only a silly
little boy,' Mother snapped in her distress and
frustration.
It was as if her words were some dreadful antidote
to our magic spell. Jem had always towered like a
giant, but now he shrivelled into a small boy scarcely
bigger than me – a boy who started sobbing.
'Say goodbye now, Jem,' Mother commanded.
Jem reached up to Gideon in her arms and kissed
his white cheek. Then he bent and kissed me too, on
both my cheeks and then my lips.
'Goodbye,
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