Forever With You (Bayou Dreams Book 5) by Farrah Rochon

Leslie wanted to do was shower and crawl under the covers. Instead of heading for the shower, she sat on the edge of her bed. From her nightstand she picked up the framed five-by-seven of Braylon in his dress uniform and stared at her husband’s handsome face.
    She’d always thought he was incredibly handsome, despite the dark purple port-wine-stain birthmark that stretched across a portion of the right side of his face, behind his ear and down his neck. Her lack of a reaction to his birthmark had been one of the reasons Leslie had figured they’d been meant to be together.
    She’d met him at a bar on South Padre Island during spring break her freshmen year at Rice. He and several of his Army buddies had been at the Coast Guard installation there and had come into the bar after a long day of exercises. Leslie, on a dare from one of her girlfriends, had entered a wet T-shirt contest, but she had refused to remove her bra and had been disqualified.
    Braylon had come up to her after she’d been booted from the stage and commended her for not caving to the pressure of the crowd that had been yelling for her to “take it off.” He’d then admitted that it would have made his night if she had listened to the crowd.
    He’d left the bar with her phone number and a promise from her that she would actually pick up if he called. It was only after one of her girlfriends had remarked about the mark on his face that Leslie even registered it. She’d fallen in love with his eyes. They were so deep, by far the richest shade of brown she’d ever encountered. Both Cassidy and Kristi had been blessed with their father’s eyes.
    Leslie traced her finger down the cold glass in the frame, rubbing along Braylon’s strong jaw. “We miss you,” she whispered. “We miss you so much, honey. You would be so proud of the girls.”
    Her eyes fell shut and she tipped her head back. She tried to stop the hot tear that trekked down her cheek, but it had been an emotional day, and her defenses had plummeted to zilch. Besides, it had been a long time since she’d allowed herself to shed a couple of tears. She was due.
    She looked down at the framed photo again.
    “I’m sorry for some of the thoughts that have been going through my head lately.” Then she laughed. “You’re probably more upset that I
haven’t
had these thoughts sooner, but I warned you that I would have a hard time moving on.”
    The one thing Braylon had reiterated over and over was that if he didn’t come home after one of his deployments he didn’t want her to sit here languishing in sorrow. He wanted her to live on. He’d made her promise that she would find a good, loving father for his girls, someone who would protect them and vow to maim any boy who so much as dared to look at them with interest before the age of eighteen.
    Leslie chuckled, shaking her head as she pushed back against the headboard and brought her knees to her chest.
    Even though she had known it was a very real possibility that he could be taken from her, she had always felt deep in her heart that Braylon would return. She’d just never expected him to bring the kind of nightmares that followed him home from battle. Those scars—the ones etched on his soul—had led to his ultimate demise. He’d struggled with PTSD, had sought counseling both in the doctor’s office and in the church, but it hadn’t been enough.
    Leslie’s eyes fell shut.
    These days it was only on the rare occasion that she allowed herself to think about Braylon’s suicide. Wallowing in the tragedy wouldn’t bring him back. It wouldn’t give her girls a safe, stable home. The smart thing—the healthy thing—was to keep the good parts of his memory alive for both Cassidy and Kristi, and try her hardest to forget Braylon’s tragic end.
    But, God, it was hard to forget.
    When it came to moving on, Leslie could only hope that one day she would find the strength to do it.
    Unbidden, Gabriel’s enticing smile strolled