Finding Faith by Reana Malori

proximity to each other. Sometimes, she wondered how she had gotten into this mess. Falling in love with a man who was still in love with his deceased wife had not been her best move.  
    Deciding to ignore Cooper, she turned back to Madison. That man could get glad in the same underwear he got mad in. She was not doing this with him tonight. Just because she had always been there for him in the past, didn’t mean she would stay that way. She had a life too and she would be damned if he would try to prevent that.  
    Picking up the remote control from where it sat on the coffee table, she turned up the television. Trying valiantly to ignore the man who had caused her numerous sleepless nights, she purposely looked away from him. It took all her willpower not to turn around and ask him why he was just standing there staring a hole in the back of her head.  
    After a few more seconds, he gave up and stomped back into the kitchen. His heavy footsteps hinting at his level of frustration. Good! Now he could feel a little of what she had been going through.  
    When she and Cooper had first met, it had been lust at first sight. At least for her it was. Not usually prone to jumping to conclusions, she found herself doodling his name while sitting in meetings. Or she found that she was prone to waiting for that first glimpse of him each day. For a grounded woman in her early thirties, she had become giddy at the thought of her and Cooper as a couple. A naked, sweaty, loving all night long until the sun came up type of couple. It was completely out of character for her, but that hadn’t made the thoughts go away.  
    But no matter what happened and no matter how many times she may have wished he’d look at her as more than just a friend, it just hadn’t come to be. They had lived next to each other for all these months and other than their first embarrassing meeting, she had been very careful to not make any risky moves. That didn’t mean she hadn’t given him a hug that lasted a second too long. Or ran her hands through his hair as they were hanging out at the park, or even while sitting on the front porch watching Madison play with her friends.  
    Cooper had never given any real inkling of being attracted to her, other than to remark on her appearance in a general sense, as any gentleman would. There were those moments when it had been only the two of them, when things seemed just right. Perfectly situated for something to change, for the moment to flip. Whether they were sitting on the porch swing out front or at the dining room table after a meal. She could almost feel something bubbling to the surface, waiting to break free.  
    Just as she would begin to peel back the layers and gather enough bravado to address the elephant in the room, something would always happen. Some interruption would occur to end the moment and the opportunity would slip through her hands. Or, even worse, seconds...minutes would simply pass by without a word being said between the two of them. Usually because she was too chicken-shit to risk putting her foot in her mouth.  
    He had even gone on a few dates and asked her to watch Madison. Those had not been fun nights for her. Waiting. Wondering. Praying that her overly dramatic mind was completely and utterly wrong.  
    They were very close friends and she loved that about their relationship. That was one part of her world that she never wanted to change. They spent almost all their free time together. Finishing each other’s sentences had become a running joke. Cooper never failed to anticipate her needs, even when she was in a total funk. It was new and different, and somewhat refreshing, to only be friends without the sex mixed in. Some marriages had lasted for less time than their friendship and she would be smart to not mess that up.  
    Then again, her growing desire for Cooper, that elusive need to have something more with him, almost broke her heart. How she longed to tell him that her