the gun down on the table and moved to sit on the chair next to his. “It’s like everything before is wiped away, and I want to remember the good things about it. The good things about touching. Please?”
“Princess, you’re gonna get me killed dead.”
“Killed dead? Is that a thing?”
“If Brick finds out, he sure as shit is gonna come up with a new level of dead.”
“Please.”
“Is this why you insisted on me chewing gum?”
“Yes,” she admitted with a smile. “Please.”
“You realize that kissing involves touching?” he tried in a final attempt to just get the damn thought out of her head.
“I rode bitch with you, Roach. We touch.”
Did they? They were. He just hadn’t thought about it before, but he was touching her. Not groping, or anything, but taking her hand to get her off a couch, or a hand on the small of her back, stuff like that. It had just happened and he hadn’t noticed it, but he wasn’t surprised she had. Which was probably why she’d gotten the insane idea that he should kiss her.
“Princess, this is a really shitty idea, for a lot of reasons.”
“Why?”
“Besides the killed dead thing, it’s… going to turn this into something it shouldn’t be.”
“What? No! It’s not like that. It’s not like I’m in love with you or anything. It really only is about the kiss.”
“No. I can’t.”
“It won’t be weird. We’ll kiss, finish cleaning these guns, I’ll go home, and we’ll see each other, like, tomorrow or something, and it’ll be just like normal. I promise.”
But it didn’t work like that, and he knew that. This was one of those things he really should avoid at all costs. To his own surprise, he’d come to like her, and she was cute as a fucking button when she was in the right mood, but that was as far as he’d allowed those thoughts to go. Kissing had a nasty tendency to bring out other things.
“Princess, it’s not going to happen.”
She picked up the gun again and kept polishing, but she fell silent. And soon he heard the first snivel.
“Are you crying?” he asked.
“No,” she whimpered. “Maybe a little. Is it because I’m, like, disgusting?”
“What?! What the fuck are you on about now? Why would I think you’re disgusting?”
“Because you know they… came in my mouth.”
“Jesus fucking christ, Princess, no! Absolutely not. That’s… fuck.” Holy shit, he’d dug himself a deep one this time. “No one will think you’re disgusting.”
“I do,” she whispered.
Maybe he could just load a gun and shoot himself. That would be the best outcome he could think of right then, and he might’ve considered it if he’d actually brought bullets for the guns. Then he sighed. There was no fucking good way out of this for him, so maybe he could just… make her feel better. No matter what he said now, she’d think it was because of her.
“Give me another piece of gum.” He took it and then handed her a paper towel. “And dry off your face. I’m guessing tasting tears isn’t gonna help.”
Her eyes flew up, and she stared at him for a few seconds before shaking her head. “No. It won’t.”
“I’m doing this once . It is not going to happen again— ever . And you can’t tell anyone. Not your mom, Billie, or anyone of The Green Pussycats—”
“Kittens.”
“Whatever. No one. And I’m not putting a stop to it after this because I think you’re disgusting. I don’t. I think you’re really pretty, and you’ll make some guy really fucking lucky one day, but you’re not my luck, Princess. Are we clear?”
“Yes,” she nodded and wiped off her face.
“Repeat it.”
“It won’t happen again.”
There was one more thing he wanted to be sure of.
“Just to be clear. This isn’t about me? You just want to know what it’s like?”
“Yes, because besides my dad, my brothers, and Bull, you’re pretty much the only guy I can even be close to. And I really don’t want to kiss
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