she seems to be…’
‘And what about you? Have you any ideas about a career? You could go a long way with a good brain like yours.’
‘No, I’ve no idea at all.’ Maisie shook her head. ‘I feel sort of…lost and bewildered at the moment. I don’t know what I’m doing or even what I’m thinking.’ She suddenly knew that she had to confide in Anne. ‘That’s why I want to get back to school, to help to focus my mind.’ She looked across at her friend. ‘D’you mind if I tell you something, Anne? It’s sort of…personal, although some people do know about it – my mum and Audrey – but they think I’m being silly, I know they do. And I suppose I am, really… You see, I thought I was in love with somebody; I know I was. Well, I still am, but now I know that I’ve been a complete idiot.’
Anne nodded gravely, and Maisie could see the concern in her eyes. ‘Yes, by all means tell me about it; I’m glad that you want to. But I think I can guess… It’s Bruce, isn’t it?’
‘Yes…’ breathed Maisie. ‘Oh dear, is it so obvious? D’you think everybody knows? D’you think they’ll all be laughing at me? Or feeling sorry for me and saying, “Poor Maisie”?’
‘No, I don’t think so at all,’ replied Anne. ‘I guessed because I know you very well. I know you and Bruce have been friendly over the years, and you told me once that you were writing to him. But you haven’t had a great deal to do with boys, have you, Maisie? Bruce came along when you were feeling vulnerable and in need of friends, and he was kind to you, wasn’t he?’
Maisie nodded. ‘I know I’m only fifteen. That’s what my mum says, and I know it’s what everybody would say, that I can’t know what it’s like to be in love at my age. But I do, I really do…and I know, now, that he only thought of me as a friend; as a kid, I suppose. And it hurts, Anne; it hurts so much.’
‘I’m sure it does…’ Anne smiled sadly. ‘I know what it feels like to lose someone, too.’
Maisie looked at her in horror. ‘Oh, Anne! How dreadful of me! I’m so sorry; I was forgetting about you and Bill. Well, no, that’s not true; I hadn’t forgotten about it, how could I forget? But I’ve been so wrapped up in my own concerns that… I’m really sorry. I know this doesn’t compare at all with what happened to you.’
‘It’s all right, dear,’ said Anne. ‘Losing Bill was terrible and I thought I would never get over it. But the pain subsides to a certain extent. And although it’s an awful cliché, life has to go on. You’ll get over this. I know it’s painful… I saw Bruce last night with a young lady, and I guessed that you might be upset. But there will be somebody else for you. Maybe quite a few somebodies before you meet the right one.’
‘D’you think so?’
‘Of course I do. Bill wasn’t my one and only boyfriend. When I was in the sixth form I was madly in love – or imagined I was – with a lad I met at a dance hall. My parents didn’t like him, and theytried so hard to convince me that he was not a suitable friend for me to have. He was an apprentice plumber. Not that that was what mattered to them; my parents were not snobs, although they did hope for someone – what shall I say? – rather higher up the career ladder. But they were right, not because of the job he did, but because they knew he was so wrong for me. I wouldn’t listen, though…’
‘And…what happened?’
‘He chucked me, to put it bluntly. He was two-timing me and I found out and that was that. I thought my heart would break, but I was going to college soon afterwards so I had other things to think about. I went out on a few dates after that – my friends’ brothers and that sort of thing – but I didn’t think seriously about young men again until I met Bill. Then we both knew that that was it.’
Maisie began to feel quite ashamed of her reaction to what she had regarded as Bruce’s infidelity, although it
‘And what about you? Have you any ideas about a career? You could go a long way with a good brain like yours.’
‘No, I’ve no idea at all.’ Maisie shook her head. ‘I feel sort of…lost and bewildered at the moment. I don’t know what I’m doing or even what I’m thinking.’ She suddenly knew that she had to confide in Anne. ‘That’s why I want to get back to school, to help to focus my mind.’ She looked across at her friend. ‘D’you mind if I tell you something, Anne? It’s sort of…personal, although some people do know about it – my mum and Audrey – but they think I’m being silly, I know they do. And I suppose I am, really… You see, I thought I was in love with somebody; I know I was. Well, I still am, but now I know that I’ve been a complete idiot.’
Anne nodded gravely, and Maisie could see the concern in her eyes. ‘Yes, by all means tell me about it; I’m glad that you want to. But I think I can guess… It’s Bruce, isn’t it?’
‘Yes…’ breathed Maisie. ‘Oh dear, is it so obvious? D’you think everybody knows? D’you think they’ll all be laughing at me? Or feeling sorry for me and saying, “Poor Maisie”?’
‘No, I don’t think so at all,’ replied Anne. ‘I guessed because I know you very well. I know you and Bruce have been friendly over the years, and you told me once that you were writing to him. But you haven’t had a great deal to do with boys, have you, Maisie? Bruce came along when you were feeling vulnerable and in need of friends, and he was kind to you, wasn’t he?’
Maisie nodded. ‘I know I’m only fifteen. That’s what my mum says, and I know it’s what everybody would say, that I can’t know what it’s like to be in love at my age. But I do, I really do…and I know, now, that he only thought of me as a friend; as a kid, I suppose. And it hurts, Anne; it hurts so much.’
‘I’m sure it does…’ Anne smiled sadly. ‘I know what it feels like to lose someone, too.’
Maisie looked at her in horror. ‘Oh, Anne! How dreadful of me! I’m so sorry; I was forgetting about you and Bill. Well, no, that’s not true; I hadn’t forgotten about it, how could I forget? But I’ve been so wrapped up in my own concerns that… I’m really sorry. I know this doesn’t compare at all with what happened to you.’
‘It’s all right, dear,’ said Anne. ‘Losing Bill was terrible and I thought I would never get over it. But the pain subsides to a certain extent. And although it’s an awful cliché, life has to go on. You’ll get over this. I know it’s painful… I saw Bruce last night with a young lady, and I guessed that you might be upset. But there will be somebody else for you. Maybe quite a few somebodies before you meet the right one.’
‘D’you think so?’
‘Of course I do. Bill wasn’t my one and only boyfriend. When I was in the sixth form I was madly in love – or imagined I was – with a lad I met at a dance hall. My parents didn’t like him, and theytried so hard to convince me that he was not a suitable friend for me to have. He was an apprentice plumber. Not that that was what mattered to them; my parents were not snobs, although they did hope for someone – what shall I say? – rather higher up the career ladder. But they were right, not because of the job he did, but because they knew he was so wrong for me. I wouldn’t listen, though…’
‘And…what happened?’
‘He chucked me, to put it bluntly. He was two-timing me and I found out and that was that. I thought my heart would break, but I was going to college soon afterwards so I had other things to think about. I went out on a few dates after that – my friends’ brothers and that sort of thing – but I didn’t think seriously about young men again until I met Bill. Then we both knew that that was it.’
Maisie began to feel quite ashamed of her reaction to what she had regarded as Bruce’s infidelity, although it
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