months touring the US with the team. I had no idea what depths she’d fallen to until it was too late.”
My heart clenched as I bore my soul to Katie. But it was also cathartic. I’d told my shrink all this stuff, of course, but his job was to be unmoved by my words, to just act as someone to vent towards and steer me when needed. Katie, on the other hand, was looking at me with a look of utter sympathy and affection. Her hand twitched on the table as though she were debating whether to reach for me and pull me in for an embrace. I wanted her to. God, how I wanted to feel her touch again.
“Enough about me,” I said, snapping out of it. “We were talking about Jessica.”
“Yes,” Katie said quietly, looking down at her hands. “But I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“Why not?”
She locked her steady gaze on me. “You just told me you’re an intelligent man, Harrison,” she said. “But you’re stupid enough not to feel that magnetism between us.”
Her honesty disarmed me, and her words inflamed my desire. I shuffled in my seat, adjusting my pants, which were feeling suddenly tight.
“I feel it,” I said.
“Then let’s not pretend we can have a deep conversation and bare our souls to one another without it leading somewhere.”
“I’m not pretending,” I countered. “I think this should lead somewhere.”
Now it was my turn to be honest. Katie’s head darted up. “I already told you I was risking my career for you. Do you know how close I came to getting fired just now?”
“Because of what’s going on with Jessica. That has nothing to do with me.”
“It has everything to do with you,” she shot back. “I can’t get you out of my head. I had to do something to block you out! Throwing myself headfirst into Jessica’s case was the only way I could do it. And even that didn’t work!”
She was shaking her head, looking increasingly distressed. It hurt to think that something that felt so right could cause her so much anguish. To hear her say those words to me, that she was thinking of me as much as I was of her, and yet seeing her fight those feelings so passionately, was making my mind spin.
“You don’t seriously think that I haven’t spent every second since I left this place thinking of your touch on my skin…” Katie added. “Wanting to feel it again. Yearning for it.”
Heat raced up my neck. I could feel sweat collecting on my back. I could spend all day listening to her talk about her feelings for me. If she were attempting to put me off her, she was failing miserably. Just listening to her was making me aroused.
I willed her to keep talking, to keep telling me how strong my power over her was. Listening to her voice was like an aphrodisiac.
“I can’t get close to you, Harrison,” she said with finality. “I don’t trust myself around you. I don’t even recognize myself when I’m with you.”
I could feel my heart racing in my chest. She’d confirmed to me that she felt the same intense attraction for me that I felt for her. I had to tread carefully so as not to scare her off.
“Do you mean you don’t recognize the sexual side of you?” I said, thinking back to my therapy sessions, encouraging her to divulge more. “Because you can’t see yourself as a stunning, accomplished woman deserving of sex?”
Katie looked away and shook her head a little as though dismissing my words.
“Maybe,” I added gently, “you’re anxious about unlocking that part of you, knowing that once you start you’ll never be able to stop....”
Her eyes were fixed on her notes in front of her. She sighed. “You’re going to think I’m crazy.”
“Try me.”
Her gaze flicked up. “It’s just that whenever I give in to my desires, bad things happen.”
“Like what?” I pressed, grateful that she was opening up to me and hadn’t shut me out entirely.
“Well, the night Jessica was raped was the first night I’d been intimate with anyone for over a
My heart clenched as I bore my soul to Katie. But it was also cathartic. I’d told my shrink all this stuff, of course, but his job was to be unmoved by my words, to just act as someone to vent towards and steer me when needed. Katie, on the other hand, was looking at me with a look of utter sympathy and affection. Her hand twitched on the table as though she were debating whether to reach for me and pull me in for an embrace. I wanted her to. God, how I wanted to feel her touch again.
“Enough about me,” I said, snapping out of it. “We were talking about Jessica.”
“Yes,” Katie said quietly, looking down at her hands. “But I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“Why not?”
She locked her steady gaze on me. “You just told me you’re an intelligent man, Harrison,” she said. “But you’re stupid enough not to feel that magnetism between us.”
Her honesty disarmed me, and her words inflamed my desire. I shuffled in my seat, adjusting my pants, which were feeling suddenly tight.
“I feel it,” I said.
“Then let’s not pretend we can have a deep conversation and bare our souls to one another without it leading somewhere.”
“I’m not pretending,” I countered. “I think this should lead somewhere.”
Now it was my turn to be honest. Katie’s head darted up. “I already told you I was risking my career for you. Do you know how close I came to getting fired just now?”
“Because of what’s going on with Jessica. That has nothing to do with me.”
“It has everything to do with you,” she shot back. “I can’t get you out of my head. I had to do something to block you out! Throwing myself headfirst into Jessica’s case was the only way I could do it. And even that didn’t work!”
She was shaking her head, looking increasingly distressed. It hurt to think that something that felt so right could cause her so much anguish. To hear her say those words to me, that she was thinking of me as much as I was of her, and yet seeing her fight those feelings so passionately, was making my mind spin.
“You don’t seriously think that I haven’t spent every second since I left this place thinking of your touch on my skin…” Katie added. “Wanting to feel it again. Yearning for it.”
Heat raced up my neck. I could feel sweat collecting on my back. I could spend all day listening to her talk about her feelings for me. If she were attempting to put me off her, she was failing miserably. Just listening to her was making me aroused.
I willed her to keep talking, to keep telling me how strong my power over her was. Listening to her voice was like an aphrodisiac.
“I can’t get close to you, Harrison,” she said with finality. “I don’t trust myself around you. I don’t even recognize myself when I’m with you.”
I could feel my heart racing in my chest. She’d confirmed to me that she felt the same intense attraction for me that I felt for her. I had to tread carefully so as not to scare her off.
“Do you mean you don’t recognize the sexual side of you?” I said, thinking back to my therapy sessions, encouraging her to divulge more. “Because you can’t see yourself as a stunning, accomplished woman deserving of sex?”
Katie looked away and shook her head a little as though dismissing my words.
“Maybe,” I added gently, “you’re anxious about unlocking that part of you, knowing that once you start you’ll never be able to stop....”
Her eyes were fixed on her notes in front of her. She sighed. “You’re going to think I’m crazy.”
“Try me.”
Her gaze flicked up. “It’s just that whenever I give in to my desires, bad things happen.”
“Like what?” I pressed, grateful that she was opening up to me and hadn’t shut me out entirely.
“Well, the night Jessica was raped was the first night I’d been intimate with anyone for over a
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