moment consider deleting the voice mails without even listening to them. Unfortunately my curiosity wins out and I nervously wait to hear his voice on the other end of the phone.
“Addison it's Liam. Look, I don't know what happened the other night but will you call me..... Please.” I hit delete and move on to the next message.
“Okay so now I know you are intentionally not answering. I really don't understand why you are so hell bent on avoiding me. Just call me okay?” Once again I delete the message and hold my breath for message number three.
“Addison, it's Liam. I just wanted to thank you for your company on Friday night. It truly was an amazing evening. I promised one dinner and I would leave you alone. This is me keeping my promise.” I draw my phone away from ear in a haze. This is what I wanted right? For him to leave me alone and let me be.
Then why do I feel so horrible right now? Why do I feel like my heart is breaking all over again with the thought of never seeing him again? I breathe out loudly trying to calm myself. This is for the best, it has to be. He will only hurt me in the end, I know this. And yet the knowledge of this does not make the pill any easier to swallow.
I drop my phone back in my purse and wipe at my eyes, determined not to let a single tear fall. I will not cry over another man, especially one that I don't even know. But I want to know him. I want to know what it feels like to be in his arms, to feel his body against mine. I want all of it, and therein lies the real problem.
I stand up and mindlessly head back inside. After the email from Katie and then Liam finally giving me what I want, even though it's not truly what I want but what I need, my mind is officially on overdrive.
It takes me a moment to register yet another bouquet of Gardenias sitting on my desk as I approach. Are you fucking kidding me? What the hell do I have to do? I spot the card instantly and rip it from the bouquet half expecting it to be some type of hate mail. What I find instead, sends me spinning in an entirely different direction.
Did I mention that I am horrible at keeping promises?
Well ones that involve never seeing you again anyways.
Thinking of you always.
The flowers are from Liam? I was so sure they were from Grayson. How could I get it so wrong? It makes sense. I received the first bouquet just after our first meeting and they have been coming each week since then. I can feel the blood rise to my face and the intense acceleration of my heart beat. As much as I wanted him to leave me alone, the devastation that he was actually going to do it seemed impossible to stomach. And so the truth is revealed. I am not ready to never see him again. I am not ready to walk away on something, that for the first time, makes me feel alive. He's not going to stop and I don't know how much longer I can deny him. I am in so much trouble.
Chapter Thirteen
––––––––
D espite my desire to reach out to Liam, I have held silent for the past three days. He hasn't called or text which leads me to believe that he is waiting for me to make the next move. Unfortunately I simply can not bring myself to be the one to reach out to him. That would be me admitting defeat, admitting that no matter how hard I fight it, I can't stay away from him. I'm not ready to admit that yet.
I have spent the week buried in my work and with any luck I can continue to do so for the foreseeable future. Having made it half way through Friday without any incident, I decide I have earned an actual lunch break and grab Dana to join me.
I go through the motions, the mindless chit chat that seems to surround everyone I talk to when I am preoccupied by something else, or someone else as it were. By the time we take our seats at Sans Bistro , Dana has figured out that I am paying next to no attention to anything she has said on the walk over.
“Okay spill.” She breathes out just as the waitress leaves us to get our
“Addison it's Liam. Look, I don't know what happened the other night but will you call me..... Please.” I hit delete and move on to the next message.
“Okay so now I know you are intentionally not answering. I really don't understand why you are so hell bent on avoiding me. Just call me okay?” Once again I delete the message and hold my breath for message number three.
“Addison, it's Liam. I just wanted to thank you for your company on Friday night. It truly was an amazing evening. I promised one dinner and I would leave you alone. This is me keeping my promise.” I draw my phone away from ear in a haze. This is what I wanted right? For him to leave me alone and let me be.
Then why do I feel so horrible right now? Why do I feel like my heart is breaking all over again with the thought of never seeing him again? I breathe out loudly trying to calm myself. This is for the best, it has to be. He will only hurt me in the end, I know this. And yet the knowledge of this does not make the pill any easier to swallow.
I drop my phone back in my purse and wipe at my eyes, determined not to let a single tear fall. I will not cry over another man, especially one that I don't even know. But I want to know him. I want to know what it feels like to be in his arms, to feel his body against mine. I want all of it, and therein lies the real problem.
I stand up and mindlessly head back inside. After the email from Katie and then Liam finally giving me what I want, even though it's not truly what I want but what I need, my mind is officially on overdrive.
It takes me a moment to register yet another bouquet of Gardenias sitting on my desk as I approach. Are you fucking kidding me? What the hell do I have to do? I spot the card instantly and rip it from the bouquet half expecting it to be some type of hate mail. What I find instead, sends me spinning in an entirely different direction.
Did I mention that I am horrible at keeping promises?
Well ones that involve never seeing you again anyways.
Thinking of you always.
The flowers are from Liam? I was so sure they were from Grayson. How could I get it so wrong? It makes sense. I received the first bouquet just after our first meeting and they have been coming each week since then. I can feel the blood rise to my face and the intense acceleration of my heart beat. As much as I wanted him to leave me alone, the devastation that he was actually going to do it seemed impossible to stomach. And so the truth is revealed. I am not ready to never see him again. I am not ready to walk away on something, that for the first time, makes me feel alive. He's not going to stop and I don't know how much longer I can deny him. I am in so much trouble.
Chapter Thirteen
––––––––
D espite my desire to reach out to Liam, I have held silent for the past three days. He hasn't called or text which leads me to believe that he is waiting for me to make the next move. Unfortunately I simply can not bring myself to be the one to reach out to him. That would be me admitting defeat, admitting that no matter how hard I fight it, I can't stay away from him. I'm not ready to admit that yet.
I have spent the week buried in my work and with any luck I can continue to do so for the foreseeable future. Having made it half way through Friday without any incident, I decide I have earned an actual lunch break and grab Dana to join me.
I go through the motions, the mindless chit chat that seems to surround everyone I talk to when I am preoccupied by something else, or someone else as it were. By the time we take our seats at Sans Bistro , Dana has figured out that I am paying next to no attention to anything she has said on the walk over.
“Okay spill.” She breathes out just as the waitress leaves us to get our
Similar Books
