in my campus days. The hard stuff. These bastards can fix visions which make a mainline trip look like an old monochrome movie! Okay, I’m over it now, but short of turning me into a cabbage-head, they can’t take out my memory. Worse, it’s knowing what I’m like, deep down.”
“Let it go, Ted. These are early days.”
“Don’t kid yourself. I can’t. We all have some personal phobia. I can’t stand snakes: it’s as if I had one coiled up inside my brain.” His clenched hands battered his skull, his voice rising. “In there! It didn’t creep in - it’s been there all the time!”
Forbin grabbed the hands, pulling them down with frightening ease. “Stop it, Blake! Take a grip!”
Weary, Blake sank back into the pillows. “Yeah. I’ve been told that once or twice already. Colossus’s prognosis is that the illusion, the image or whatever, will fade -“
“The Martians said you would recover,” said Forbin
hesitantly.
“Bully for them!” He looked at Forbin steadily.
“They’d better be right. I tell you, Charles, if I find I have no hope, I’ll blow my brains out - and do it with pleasure .” He grinned thinly. ” And this is where you say ‘you mustn’t talk like that.’ “
Forbin did not answer.
“Now you know. Do me a favor: give me something to think about.”
“You mean it? Okay …”He gave a brief, factual recital of events, leaving out his fears. He told of the Martian demand, the Collector, the hideous powers of the aliens, and their astonishing weaknesses. Almost apologetically he mentioned his assumption of World-Ruler and his unwanted elevation to Father of the Sect.
Blake listened, his eyes shut, until Forbin finished.
“Before the Martians hit me, I was a different character. I might - hell, no - would have been jealous of you Now I’m not. Somewhere I recall something about the meek inheriting the earth. …”
“The Bible.”
“Yeah? Well, it finally makes sense. I can’t say I’m sorry for my crazy, half-baked ideas, because I can’t feel strongly about anything, not now. I wish I could.” He frowned. “Words … Anyway, if it gives you a warm glow, and for what it’s worth, one-time Superman Blake is right behind you. Jesus! Galin must be rotating supersonically in his grave - if he’s got one!”
Forbin waved the subject aside. “Trivia, Ted. It means nothing. At best my pathetic bit of power can only reduce the damage the Martians will do.”
“Yes, our chums … matter transference - that really louses up any idea of capturing them.”
Forbin looked up sharply.
“Forget it, Charles. You think I don’t know I’m kidding? Me, of all people? “He changed the subject. “Even in my condition, I’m kinda interested in why they want this oxygen.”
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t know? You mean they won’t say?”
Forbin shook his head. He confessed, “Don’t ask why, but I don’t spend one single moment more than I can help in their presence. I don’t want to ask; perhaps I fear the answer. I just don’t know.”
“Listen, Charles, maybe my detached state has its value. Me, I care not if the whole goddam world goes up in a flash of blue flame; I can watch with a dispassion you cannot have. You’ve gotta ask, but first, grab yourself all the data going on Mars. Why? Because they come from Mars, and sure as hell they intend to take our oxygen back there. Before you put The Question, get all the dope you can-that’s my advice.”
“Urn, you could be right.”
“You know, Charles, you’re doing me good; something to think about, apart from myself.” His mind slid off at a tangent. “So Colossus rides again!”
“Not really. As a brain, we’re back eight, ten years, stuck with a child.”
“Maybe this child’ll grow.”
Forbin told him of the operation the Martians had performed. Blake did not comment, changing the subject again. “Tell me about these regeneration periods.”
“I haven’t checked, but I’d
“Let it go, Ted. These are early days.”
“Don’t kid yourself. I can’t. We all have some personal phobia. I can’t stand snakes: it’s as if I had one coiled up inside my brain.” His clenched hands battered his skull, his voice rising. “In there! It didn’t creep in - it’s been there all the time!”
Forbin grabbed the hands, pulling them down with frightening ease. “Stop it, Blake! Take a grip!”
Weary, Blake sank back into the pillows. “Yeah. I’ve been told that once or twice already. Colossus’s prognosis is that the illusion, the image or whatever, will fade -“
“The Martians said you would recover,” said Forbin
hesitantly.
“Bully for them!” He looked at Forbin steadily.
“They’d better be right. I tell you, Charles, if I find I have no hope, I’ll blow my brains out - and do it with pleasure .” He grinned thinly. ” And this is where you say ‘you mustn’t talk like that.’ “
Forbin did not answer.
“Now you know. Do me a favor: give me something to think about.”
“You mean it? Okay …”He gave a brief, factual recital of events, leaving out his fears. He told of the Martian demand, the Collector, the hideous powers of the aliens, and their astonishing weaknesses. Almost apologetically he mentioned his assumption of World-Ruler and his unwanted elevation to Father of the Sect.
Blake listened, his eyes shut, until Forbin finished.
“Before the Martians hit me, I was a different character. I might - hell, no - would have been jealous of you Now I’m not. Somewhere I recall something about the meek inheriting the earth. …”
“The Bible.”
“Yeah? Well, it finally makes sense. I can’t say I’m sorry for my crazy, half-baked ideas, because I can’t feel strongly about anything, not now. I wish I could.” He frowned. “Words … Anyway, if it gives you a warm glow, and for what it’s worth, one-time Superman Blake is right behind you. Jesus! Galin must be rotating supersonically in his grave - if he’s got one!”
Forbin waved the subject aside. “Trivia, Ted. It means nothing. At best my pathetic bit of power can only reduce the damage the Martians will do.”
“Yes, our chums … matter transference - that really louses up any idea of capturing them.”
Forbin looked up sharply.
“Forget it, Charles. You think I don’t know I’m kidding? Me, of all people? “He changed the subject. “Even in my condition, I’m kinda interested in why they want this oxygen.”
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t know? You mean they won’t say?”
Forbin shook his head. He confessed, “Don’t ask why, but I don’t spend one single moment more than I can help in their presence. I don’t want to ask; perhaps I fear the answer. I just don’t know.”
“Listen, Charles, maybe my detached state has its value. Me, I care not if the whole goddam world goes up in a flash of blue flame; I can watch with a dispassion you cannot have. You’ve gotta ask, but first, grab yourself all the data going on Mars. Why? Because they come from Mars, and sure as hell they intend to take our oxygen back there. Before you put The Question, get all the dope you can-that’s my advice.”
“Urn, you could be right.”
“You know, Charles, you’re doing me good; something to think about, apart from myself.” His mind slid off at a tangent. “So Colossus rides again!”
“Not really. As a brain, we’re back eight, ten years, stuck with a child.”
“Maybe this child’ll grow.”
Forbin told him of the operation the Martians had performed. Blake did not comment, changing the subject again. “Tell me about these regeneration periods.”
“I haven’t checked, but I’d
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