sated.
He caressed my breasts and kissed them again and laughed. “You know, CJ, I was afraid that I would never have this again with you. I can’t tell you how I felt when you were missing. Especially since I knew what kind of men had you. I would have given anything, done anything, to have you back in my arms again.”
That’s when it struck me. He would do anything to get me back. It was established that Sophie was behind the whole thing. Would he have slept with her to get the information that he needed to find me?
If that were the case, then I might have found it in my heart to totally forgive him. Maybe.
I looked at him. “Asher,” I said. “I…”
I didn’t say anything after that for a little while, and Asher was still laying beside me, looking at me with a question in my eyes. “Finish your thought,” he finally said softly. It wasn’t said in a pushy way, but, rather, his tone was that of concern.
What came out of my mouth was something that even I wasn’t expecting. “I noticed that you didn’t use a condom with me this time, and I was wondering why.” Then I shook my head, wondering why I was asking that question. It was something that was weighing a bit on my mind, as he and I had always used condoms and he knew that I ``wasn’t taking any kind of birth control. The pill, or any other kind of hormonal birth control, was just something that I didn’t want to mess with. I didn’t want that kind of artificial drugs in my body.
But why did I ask that question, and not the question that I was really wanting to ask? I had wanted to ask him if he had slept with Sophie because maybe that was how he was able to find information. Yet I asked him about why he didn’t use condoms with me.
He nodded his head. “Yes,” he said, his finger trailing across my skin. It traveled from my breasts to my waist, and then landed on my chin. He raised my face to him ever so slightly, and then kissed me again. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that without asking you first.”
What was he saying? “Are you trying to say that you want to have a child with me?”
He nodded. “But we haven’t talked about it, and I’m sorry about that. It was just something that I spontaneously started to consider, right at the heat of the moment. I’m so sorry, CJ, that wasn’t exactly responsible of me.”
I shook my head. “Asher, I’m not saying that I don’t want to have a child with you. But it’s not a good time.”
And then it struck me on what was really bothering me about him not using a condom with me. I looked at him, his blue eyes trained on me. He kissed me again, and I tried to stop from absolutely melting.
“I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I wish that I could have taken that back. I do love you, though, and I think that you would be an amazing mother.”
“Did you also think that Sophie would be an amazing mother?” Right there was the biting question that was on the tip of my tongue. The biting question that I tried hard to suppress. Yet there it was, lingering in the air and poisoning the atmosphere.
He gave me a look of disgust. “Of course not,” he said. “Why would you say something like that to me?”
I examined my nails and refused to look at him. “Because you apparently didn’t use a condom when you slept with her. Otherwise, there would have been no way that she was pregnant with your child. You and she were not being careful.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. I suddenly didn’t feel so special. His apparent romantic gesture of wanting to conceive a child with me suddenly felt dirty and tainted. Perhaps that was just how he was – irresponsible. He thought about the consequences of what he did after the fact.
He was suddenly agitated. He sprung out of bed and started to pace the floor. His beautiful hand went through his thick dark hair, and then he pulled on his own hair. It stood up where his fingers were, giving him the look of somebody who was wild and just a
He caressed my breasts and kissed them again and laughed. “You know, CJ, I was afraid that I would never have this again with you. I can’t tell you how I felt when you were missing. Especially since I knew what kind of men had you. I would have given anything, done anything, to have you back in my arms again.”
That’s when it struck me. He would do anything to get me back. It was established that Sophie was behind the whole thing. Would he have slept with her to get the information that he needed to find me?
If that were the case, then I might have found it in my heart to totally forgive him. Maybe.
I looked at him. “Asher,” I said. “I…”
I didn’t say anything after that for a little while, and Asher was still laying beside me, looking at me with a question in my eyes. “Finish your thought,” he finally said softly. It wasn’t said in a pushy way, but, rather, his tone was that of concern.
What came out of my mouth was something that even I wasn’t expecting. “I noticed that you didn’t use a condom with me this time, and I was wondering why.” Then I shook my head, wondering why I was asking that question. It was something that was weighing a bit on my mind, as he and I had always used condoms and he knew that I ``wasn’t taking any kind of birth control. The pill, or any other kind of hormonal birth control, was just something that I didn’t want to mess with. I didn’t want that kind of artificial drugs in my body.
But why did I ask that question, and not the question that I was really wanting to ask? I had wanted to ask him if he had slept with Sophie because maybe that was how he was able to find information. Yet I asked him about why he didn’t use condoms with me.
He nodded his head. “Yes,” he said, his finger trailing across my skin. It traveled from my breasts to my waist, and then landed on my chin. He raised my face to him ever so slightly, and then kissed me again. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that without asking you first.”
What was he saying? “Are you trying to say that you want to have a child with me?”
He nodded. “But we haven’t talked about it, and I’m sorry about that. It was just something that I spontaneously started to consider, right at the heat of the moment. I’m so sorry, CJ, that wasn’t exactly responsible of me.”
I shook my head. “Asher, I’m not saying that I don’t want to have a child with you. But it’s not a good time.”
And then it struck me on what was really bothering me about him not using a condom with me. I looked at him, his blue eyes trained on me. He kissed me again, and I tried to stop from absolutely melting.
“I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I wish that I could have taken that back. I do love you, though, and I think that you would be an amazing mother.”
“Did you also think that Sophie would be an amazing mother?” Right there was the biting question that was on the tip of my tongue. The biting question that I tried hard to suppress. Yet there it was, lingering in the air and poisoning the atmosphere.
He gave me a look of disgust. “Of course not,” he said. “Why would you say something like that to me?”
I examined my nails and refused to look at him. “Because you apparently didn’t use a condom when you slept with her. Otherwise, there would have been no way that she was pregnant with your child. You and she were not being careful.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. I suddenly didn’t feel so special. His apparent romantic gesture of wanting to conceive a child with me suddenly felt dirty and tainted. Perhaps that was just how he was – irresponsible. He thought about the consequences of what he did after the fact.
He was suddenly agitated. He sprung out of bed and started to pace the floor. His beautiful hand went through his thick dark hair, and then he pulled on his own hair. It stood up where his fingers were, giving him the look of somebody who was wild and just a
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