just need to find the right moment.’
He nodded, then looked down at her feet, giving them undue attention. ‘I do love you, you know. I wasn’t just saying it this morning.’
She put the coffee down, very carefully, on the table that was conveniently in reach, and stared at him. ‘You do? But you hardly know me.’
‘Rubbish. You haven’t changed. We spent six months together when you were on your A and E rotation.’
‘And you had a girlfriend!’
‘Not for all of it. I ended it because she wasn’t what I wanted. I hadn’t known that until I met someone who was, and then it gradually dawned on me that I was with the wrong woman. And because I wanted to be sure, I gave us time, because I felt that this could really be it—the once-in-a-lifetime thing. Then you got to the end of your rotation, and shortly after that—’
He broke off and looked away again, and she finished for him, ‘My mother died, and it all went horribly wrong.’
He nodded, and for a moment neither of them spoke, then she said softly, ‘Ben, what if I’ve changed? What if I’m not the woman you think I am? What if time’s altered your perception of me and I can’t live up to your mental image?’ She swallowed, facing her fears head on. ‘And what if you don’t live up to mine?’
He glanced over, a quick frown pleating his brow, and he searched her face. ‘So we’ll take it slowly,’ he suggested at last. ‘Give ourselves time to get to know the people we are now. But to do that, we need to spend time together, so we have to find a way to do that.’
She nodded, knowing he was right. Marriage was for life, as the saying went, not just for Christmas, and she wasn’t sure if they knew each other well enough yet for such a huge commitment. But if everything was right between them by then, she’d much rather they were married when the baby was born, old-fashioned though it might be. Some things, she thought, were meant to be old-fashioned. And if they were to get to know each other, they had to spend time together, despite her father complicating the issue.
‘This weekend?’ she suggested. ‘I’m off from Friday after my morning surgery until Monday morning.’
‘Sure. That would be good. I’m on call tomorrow night, but I’ve got the afternoon off on Friday. I’ve got things to do but we could meet up when I’m done. I’ll book us a table somewhere for dinner on Friday night—perhaps in Padstow—and then we can come back here and chill for a couple of days. Go for a walk, toast crumpets, whatever—what do you think?’
She nodded again, even the thought enough to make herfeel more relaxed. ‘Sounds blissful,’ she said with a smile. ‘And now I really ought to go home so I don’t fall asleep at the wheel.’
Or succumb to the seductive charm of those gorgeous blue eyes…
He helped her up, held her coat for her, tucked it around her to keep her warm and kissed her lingeringly before waving her off, then went back inside.
What if I can’t live up to your mental image? And what if you don’t live up to mine?
He felt a tense knot of something strangely like fear in his chest. Please, God, by the weekend he’d have something good to tell her. Something that hopefully would help a little with the mental image she had of him?
Oh, hell. What if it didn’t? What if it was just nostalgia for the house and not a real urge to live there? And what if he didn’t get the house after all? What if, despite all his preparation, despite getting the money sorted, pinning his purchaser down to a date, getting his solicitor to bid for him over the phone and sort out the paperwork—what if, despite all that, he was quite simply outbid at the auction? If the price just went up and up and up until it was out of his reach?
Lucy stared out of her consulting-room window across the car park to the sea beyond the harbour wall, her emotions torn.
He loved her. He’d said it as if he really meant it, not in a
He nodded, then looked down at her feet, giving them undue attention. ‘I do love you, you know. I wasn’t just saying it this morning.’
She put the coffee down, very carefully, on the table that was conveniently in reach, and stared at him. ‘You do? But you hardly know me.’
‘Rubbish. You haven’t changed. We spent six months together when you were on your A and E rotation.’
‘And you had a girlfriend!’
‘Not for all of it. I ended it because she wasn’t what I wanted. I hadn’t known that until I met someone who was, and then it gradually dawned on me that I was with the wrong woman. And because I wanted to be sure, I gave us time, because I felt that this could really be it—the once-in-a-lifetime thing. Then you got to the end of your rotation, and shortly after that—’
He broke off and looked away again, and she finished for him, ‘My mother died, and it all went horribly wrong.’
He nodded, and for a moment neither of them spoke, then she said softly, ‘Ben, what if I’ve changed? What if I’m not the woman you think I am? What if time’s altered your perception of me and I can’t live up to your mental image?’ She swallowed, facing her fears head on. ‘And what if you don’t live up to mine?’
He glanced over, a quick frown pleating his brow, and he searched her face. ‘So we’ll take it slowly,’ he suggested at last. ‘Give ourselves time to get to know the people we are now. But to do that, we need to spend time together, so we have to find a way to do that.’
She nodded, knowing he was right. Marriage was for life, as the saying went, not just for Christmas, and she wasn’t sure if they knew each other well enough yet for such a huge commitment. But if everything was right between them by then, she’d much rather they were married when the baby was born, old-fashioned though it might be. Some things, she thought, were meant to be old-fashioned. And if they were to get to know each other, they had to spend time together, despite her father complicating the issue.
‘This weekend?’ she suggested. ‘I’m off from Friday after my morning surgery until Monday morning.’
‘Sure. That would be good. I’m on call tomorrow night, but I’ve got the afternoon off on Friday. I’ve got things to do but we could meet up when I’m done. I’ll book us a table somewhere for dinner on Friday night—perhaps in Padstow—and then we can come back here and chill for a couple of days. Go for a walk, toast crumpets, whatever—what do you think?’
She nodded again, even the thought enough to make herfeel more relaxed. ‘Sounds blissful,’ she said with a smile. ‘And now I really ought to go home so I don’t fall asleep at the wheel.’
Or succumb to the seductive charm of those gorgeous blue eyes…
He helped her up, held her coat for her, tucked it around her to keep her warm and kissed her lingeringly before waving her off, then went back inside.
What if I can’t live up to your mental image? And what if you don’t live up to mine?
He felt a tense knot of something strangely like fear in his chest. Please, God, by the weekend he’d have something good to tell her. Something that hopefully would help a little with the mental image she had of him?
Oh, hell. What if it didn’t? What if it was just nostalgia for the house and not a real urge to live there? And what if he didn’t get the house after all? What if, despite all his preparation, despite getting the money sorted, pinning his purchaser down to a date, getting his solicitor to bid for him over the phone and sort out the paperwork—what if, despite all that, he was quite simply outbid at the auction? If the price just went up and up and up until it was out of his reach?
Lucy stared out of her consulting-room window across the car park to the sea beyond the harbour wall, her emotions torn.
He loved her. He’d said it as if he really meant it, not in a
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