bunions. Would you like that?'
'Only if I wanted a sure way to lose my lunch,' said Tobey, but the trace of a smile flitted across his face. 'Glad to see you've stopped sulking,' I told him. Tobey's smile faded.
'Just forget about what Nana Meggie said. I have already.' Tobey looked at me and said very quietly, 'I never will.'
twenty-two. Jasmine
Maybe I'll decorate this bedroom. I haven't had it redecorated since Kamal and I separated. This pale cream colour is very staid. It's time for me to splash out on something more vibrant, more modern, more alive.
I'm scared to death . . .
This . . . this thing inside me, I'm sure it's nothing. A cyst or a benign growth, that's all. Absolutely nothing to get worked up about, I'll be fine. I feel fine. I am fine.
So why can't I sleep? This hard lump in my breast is painful. I should've visited my doctor weeks ago when I first noticed it. But it hasn't gone away. It's not getting any bigger, but it's not getting smaller either.
I do so want to talk to Minerva or Persephone about it. But there's no point in upsetting my daughters over nothing. Minerva and her husband Zuri have their own busy lives to lead and I'm glad. Zuri is a good man, just what Minerva deserves. And their son Taj is a joy. They need to focus on each other, not me. And Sephy has been through so much. Too much. So I won't say anything – at least not yet. It's time for me to put my children first. As far as this lump is concerned, I'll wait until it's something and pray that it's nothing.
Jasmine, don't fall apart now. You've been through worse than this. You'll be fine.
Keep telling yourself you'll be fine.
You'll be OK.
Whatever life throws at you, you'll be OK.
twenty-three. Sephy
I was drying the dinner plates when the feel of lips on my nape made me jump like a startled doe.
'Hello, gorgeous!' Sonny said softly.
I glanced round anxiously. 'Sonny, don't do that. Anyone could walk in.'
'So? We're both over twenty-one.' Sonny tried to pull me into his arms. Anxiety morphed into pure panic.
'Sonny, don't.'
'Why not?'
'I'm not that kind of girl.'
'What kind of girl?' Sonny said, puzzled.
'The touchy-feely kind. And I don't appreciate being mauled.'
Sonny's arms dropped to his side. 'Since when is a kiss on the neck even in the same ballpark as "being mauled"?'
'I didn't mean that. I just don't like . . . being manhandled.'
'That's not what you said a couple of nights ago.'
What a low blow!
'That was then and this is now,' I snapped. 'And it's not because I'm scared either.'
'Oh, so we're back to that,' Sonny sighed. 'Sephy, that was months ago!'
'You're the one who wrote it about me,' I reminded him.
My head was telling me to drop it. Just let it go. But my mouth kept going anyway. I had been so hurt by what Sonny had written about me that it still felt like yesterday. When I had first read his poem, I hadn't spoken to him for a couple of days in spite of the flowers and apologies he had sent round and delivered in person.
'I've already apologized for that,' said Sonny. 'Which I wouldn't've had to do, if you hadn't read it in the first place. And you keep on bringing it up. Now you seem determined to pick a fight for some reason and I'm not in the mood.'
'I just don't want Callie Rose to come in here and catch us necking.'
'Why not? Two grown-ups openly showing love for each other is not only natural but healthy.'
'Why don't we get the neighbours round, have an orgy on the living-room carpet and invite Rose to watch?' I said sourly.
'That's not what I meant and you know it. But there's nothing wrong with kissing and cuddling in front of her. God knows, she needs to see some kind of love displayed somewhere in this house.'
A silent, deadly earthquake opened up the ground between us and sent my mind careering backwards.
'What does that mean?' I asked quietly.
Sonny stood in front of me but I've never felt so far away from him as I did in that moment.
'It doesn't matter. Forget
'Only if I wanted a sure way to lose my lunch,' said Tobey, but the trace of a smile flitted across his face. 'Glad to see you've stopped sulking,' I told him. Tobey's smile faded.
'Just forget about what Nana Meggie said. I have already.' Tobey looked at me and said very quietly, 'I never will.'
twenty-two. Jasmine
Maybe I'll decorate this bedroom. I haven't had it redecorated since Kamal and I separated. This pale cream colour is very staid. It's time for me to splash out on something more vibrant, more modern, more alive.
I'm scared to death . . .
This . . . this thing inside me, I'm sure it's nothing. A cyst or a benign growth, that's all. Absolutely nothing to get worked up about, I'll be fine. I feel fine. I am fine.
So why can't I sleep? This hard lump in my breast is painful. I should've visited my doctor weeks ago when I first noticed it. But it hasn't gone away. It's not getting any bigger, but it's not getting smaller either.
I do so want to talk to Minerva or Persephone about it. But there's no point in upsetting my daughters over nothing. Minerva and her husband Zuri have their own busy lives to lead and I'm glad. Zuri is a good man, just what Minerva deserves. And their son Taj is a joy. They need to focus on each other, not me. And Sephy has been through so much. Too much. So I won't say anything – at least not yet. It's time for me to put my children first. As far as this lump is concerned, I'll wait until it's something and pray that it's nothing.
Jasmine, don't fall apart now. You've been through worse than this. You'll be fine.
Keep telling yourself you'll be fine.
You'll be OK.
Whatever life throws at you, you'll be OK.
twenty-three. Sephy
I was drying the dinner plates when the feel of lips on my nape made me jump like a startled doe.
'Hello, gorgeous!' Sonny said softly.
I glanced round anxiously. 'Sonny, don't do that. Anyone could walk in.'
'So? We're both over twenty-one.' Sonny tried to pull me into his arms. Anxiety morphed into pure panic.
'Sonny, don't.'
'Why not?'
'I'm not that kind of girl.'
'What kind of girl?' Sonny said, puzzled.
'The touchy-feely kind. And I don't appreciate being mauled.'
Sonny's arms dropped to his side. 'Since when is a kiss on the neck even in the same ballpark as "being mauled"?'
'I didn't mean that. I just don't like . . . being manhandled.'
'That's not what you said a couple of nights ago.'
What a low blow!
'That was then and this is now,' I snapped. 'And it's not because I'm scared either.'
'Oh, so we're back to that,' Sonny sighed. 'Sephy, that was months ago!'
'You're the one who wrote it about me,' I reminded him.
My head was telling me to drop it. Just let it go. But my mouth kept going anyway. I had been so hurt by what Sonny had written about me that it still felt like yesterday. When I had first read his poem, I hadn't spoken to him for a couple of days in spite of the flowers and apologies he had sent round and delivered in person.
'I've already apologized for that,' said Sonny. 'Which I wouldn't've had to do, if you hadn't read it in the first place. And you keep on bringing it up. Now you seem determined to pick a fight for some reason and I'm not in the mood.'
'I just don't want Callie Rose to come in here and catch us necking.'
'Why not? Two grown-ups openly showing love for each other is not only natural but healthy.'
'Why don't we get the neighbours round, have an orgy on the living-room carpet and invite Rose to watch?' I said sourly.
'That's not what I meant and you know it. But there's nothing wrong with kissing and cuddling in front of her. God knows, she needs to see some kind of love displayed somewhere in this house.'
A silent, deadly earthquake opened up the ground between us and sent my mind careering backwards.
'What does that mean?' I asked quietly.
Sonny stood in front of me but I've never felt so far away from him as I did in that moment.
'It doesn't matter. Forget
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