Chasing the Phoenix by Michael Swanwick Page A

the enemy alarm. In addition, Fire Orchid’s niece Little Spider, the youngest of Surplus’s ranger troop, sat beside him with her sketchbook open in her lap. They came to the central gate in the enemy’s pressed-earth ramparts, where heavy oak doors swung wide and an officer identifying himself as Colonel Glorious Legend demanded to know their business.
    In silence, Darger studied the colonel for so long that his subject grew visibly uneasy. A cold read told him that the fellow was young, untried, privileged, full of himself, and insecure—in short, a toy soldier. A fool.
    At last Darger leaned forward, as if he were about to confide some momentous secret to the officer, who drew closer in order to hear. Then he heartily slapped Colonel Glorious Legend on the shoulder, almost causing the young man to piss himself with alarm. “Glory,” he said, “you impress me mightily. If all the soldiers of the Land of the Mountain Horses are of half your mettle, it is no surprise that this war goes so well for you.”
    Glorious Legend flushed pink and scowled with pleasure.
    â€œI have come direct from the Hidden King to negotiate an end to this war with your supreme leaders. Kindly notify them of this happy event immediately.”
    At a gesture, one of the Mountain Horses soldiers presented himself to the colonel. A few quiet words, and he went skittering away. “Your honor guard must be disarmed,” Glorious Legend said to Darger, “and I will have to examine your wagon to make certain it contains no malicious contraband.”
    â€œSoldiers under a flag of truce are traditionally permitted to carry their personal weapons as a sign of respect and therefore, regretfully, I cannot allow your request,” Darger said. “Similarly, you have no right whatsoever to examine the wagon. However, I am justly famed for my humility, and so I shall allow you to do so anyway.”
    â€œWhat is in these kegs?”
    â€œWater.”
    â€œThere are six of them. Why do you need so many?
    â€œI carry them with me as a symbol of my extreme moderation, for I have sworn to drink nothing stronger until this war is over. You may open one at random if you have any reason to suspect that they are anything other than what they seem.”
    â€œThere are two rockets!” Glorious Legend cried in alarm.
    â€œSignal flares, rather. One leaves a trail of white smoke, the other black. When I return to the gate, I will have one set off to notify my monarch whether peace has yet been achieved. I shall leave them in your custody, so you know I intend no mischief with them.”
    â€œAnd this young woman sitting beside you? What is she doing with that sketchbook?”
    â€œLittle Spider is my secretary. She is here to record the terms of negotiation, and also to make drawings of such great men as we may encounter, for the benefit of posterity. Show the colonel what you are working on, Little Spider.”
    The artist smiled and held up her sketchbook, on which was drawn a version of Colonel Glorious Legend that looked considerably fiercer and more stalwart than the colonel did in actual life. Again, he pinkened.
    Not long after that, the messenger dispatched earlier returned to say that the joint commanders of the Mountain Horses army would meet with Darger immediately.
    *   *   *
    THROUGH THE camp Darger’s embassy party was led. Little Spider sketched assiduously, while Darger concentrated on looking solemn and mysterious. When they came in sight of their destination, however, he brought the wagon to an abrupt stop.
    Before him was a mess tent, its canvas walls rolled up to reveal the tables and chairs within. On several of the chairs were generals in various poses of neglectful ease: One sat with his feet up on a table, smoking a cigar. Another played solitaire. The rest simply lounged.
    Without saying a word, Darger turned the wagon around. The honor guard followed his