Chasing Superwoman by Susan DiMickele Page A

three small children, not to mention a relationship with God, friends, and extended family. Who has time to get connected?
    I used to be involved in women’s groups and discipleship. And I had lots of mentors. Before I had kids.
    Nonjudging Jane mentored me in college and we still keep in touch, although I don’t see her very often. We live in different worlds. I live between my home and my office; I start my day early and try to wrap up by 10:00 p.m. Jane lives among college students, and her day often begins at 10:00 p.m. She devotes her life to helping college women know and follow God. I can barely follow God myself, let alone help three kids on the path to faith. But Jane and I still maintain a deep connection. She’s always understood my heart, a rare gift in a friend. And while she’s one of the most conservative women you will ever meet, she doesn’t have a judgmental bone in her body. Back in college I had little if any desire to be a mother or raise children. I was bound and determined to head straight for law school. Jane cheered me on every step of the way.
    Maybe you are blessed to know someone like Nonjudging Jane, someone who is ten times more spiritual than you and lives out a faith that you could only dream of. More often than not, no one wants to be around these kind of people. Why? Because whether it’s intentional or not, they just make you feel like a spiritual minnow. Not Jane. Jane has a special gift—even though she is more like Jesus than any person I’ve ever met, she never puts anyone else down or acts like she’s Super Christian. In simple terms, she’s humble. Which is why she’s so easy to be around.
    Another thing I love about Nonjudging Jane is that I can be myself around her. I’ve told her how much I struggle, that I blend in with the Jerk Lawyers, that my language becomes more foul every year, and I’m hardly the model Christian mother for my children.
    She still loves me and believes in me.
    Nonjudging Jane always asks me to come and speak to her students about serving God while working as a lawyer. As much as I love speaking to college students, I’ve turned her down the last few years. Why? I don’t have the time. The kids are too young to come with me. I hate to travel on the weekends. And most importantly, I don’t claim to be the best role model for college students aspiring to live out their faith. What am I going to tell them anyway? Reach for your dreams, but don’t be surprised if they suck the spiritual life right out of you in the process. And if you’re planning to have children and work full time, brace yourself for the guilt, the stress, and the isolation that you will feel inside the church. I could lie and tell them that I have it all together, but I’ve never been very good at lying. So I’d have to tell them that I still haven’t figured it out and regularly fall flat on my face.
    It wouldn’t be a very inspiring message. What would I do with Lady Lawyer? She moves left of center every day, and I’m not sure I could shut her up, especially if we’re going to talk about the law. She’d probably go off on a tangent and offend everyone, and I’d get Jane in trouble for inviting some militant crazy woman to speak to a group of impressionable college students at a Christian conference.
    So I’ve been staying home.
    Lady Lawyer tried ministry once. It didn’t last. Shortly before I had Nick, I connected with a group of women in my downtown who wanted to meet, pray, network, and bring in inspirational speakers. It seemed like the perfect plan. I chaired the group for almost two years and met some incredible friends. We were organized, energized, and had about fifty women meeting every other month for lunch. After about eighteen months, the group flopped while I was out on maternity leave. In addition to my role as chair, I had taken over the responsibilities of the