Bleeding Love
I scour the bobbing faces that comprise the current of humanity streaming past my window. None of the unfamiliar features belong to the man I crave. Rick. Where is he? He should stride by my booth in Amsterdam’s red light district, or maybe hop inside for quick relief—his and mine—and end up being a few minutes late to his post as a bouncer for the live sex show debauching the other end of the block.
Should.
If he maintains his clockwork schedule. Sometime in the past three years since I’d opened my window to negotiate the first of a million not-so-standard suck and fucks with him, I’d noted his rock-solid patterns in the recess of my mind. Worse, I’d become accustomed to his routine. Until he let me down by withholding my glimpse of him.
For two weeks straight.
My cell phone’s simple bell tone startles me, jarring me from my obsessive inspection. I don’t have to leave my perch on my stool to reach the tiny stand holding my ledger, a lockbox, a clock and my phone. I tilt the screen toward myself, hoping the glowing readout proclaims Rick is attempting to contact me despite never having given him my unlisted number.
Oh crap. Not only is it not him, but it also seems I’ve been busted.
I hit the receive button, bracing myself for a typhoon of well-intended scolding.
“Perk it up over there, sister!”
I can’t help it. I laugh when Mari shouts so I can hear while I bring the device to my ear. She’s not psychic. She works the booth across the street from mine. I glance up to witness her blowing me a kiss. Instead of catching it, I bat it back with my middle finger.
A couple stares at me as though I’m crass simply because of my profession. Well, if the gesture fits…
“Don’t you have anybody else to harass? Your regular Tuesday-at-nine customer likes it when you spank him. Save it for someone who will reward your effort.”
Mari sticks her tongue out at me, catching the interest of a young man in ripped jeans who probably couldn’t afford a fifteen-minute session with the high-end workers in this section of the district. Too bad, he seems cute and frisky. Exactly the type Mari prefers and attracts with her lighthearted, playful offering.
“Seriously, Star.” Mari pauses her habitual swaying to meet my gaze across the canal and the river of people passing us by. “Are you all right? I’ve never seen you so solemn. No dancing, no flirting, no smiles for the shy guys…”
“I’m fine.”
“Just lovesick.”
“How the hell did this happen?” I massage the ache at the base of my neck.
“Well, you met this smoking-hot guy who doesn’t seem to mind that you service other men for a living. Then somehow you left him hanging.”
“Mari—”
“Sorry, Star, I’m just joking. Not the right time. I know.” She’s seldom serious and I can’t fault her for it now. Men adore banging her silly. Perky and intelligent don’t often pair up. And it’s not as though she’s entirely wrong. “I hate that you’re hurting. It’s like the time that drunk bastard hit me when I wouldn’t agree to anal and you flew off the handle. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t chased him off with your wicked heels. I just… Let me be here for you?”
“I appreciate the thought. But there’s no bad guy this time. No one to hunt and destroy.”
“More like someone to hold hostage and perform all your tricks for until he sees what a mistake he’s making. Look, maybe Rick’s spending an extended time with his family. You said he’s close to them, right? He headed home for the holidays. I’m sure…”
“I convinced myself that was the case for the first week. The holiday season is peak time around here, sex shows included. Tommy can’t be down his best bouncer for that long. Rick has to be back by now.”
“Do you want me to ask around? I can take a break later tonight and run over there quick. I can be stealthy.”
“What part of daisy dukes and two
I scour the bobbing faces that comprise the current of humanity streaming past my window. None of the unfamiliar features belong to the man I crave. Rick. Where is he? He should stride by my booth in Amsterdam’s red light district, or maybe hop inside for quick relief—his and mine—and end up being a few minutes late to his post as a bouncer for the live sex show debauching the other end of the block.
Should.
If he maintains his clockwork schedule. Sometime in the past three years since I’d opened my window to negotiate the first of a million not-so-standard suck and fucks with him, I’d noted his rock-solid patterns in the recess of my mind. Worse, I’d become accustomed to his routine. Until he let me down by withholding my glimpse of him.
For two weeks straight.
My cell phone’s simple bell tone startles me, jarring me from my obsessive inspection. I don’t have to leave my perch on my stool to reach the tiny stand holding my ledger, a lockbox, a clock and my phone. I tilt the screen toward myself, hoping the glowing readout proclaims Rick is attempting to contact me despite never having given him my unlisted number.
Oh crap. Not only is it not him, but it also seems I’ve been busted.
I hit the receive button, bracing myself for a typhoon of well-intended scolding.
“Perk it up over there, sister!”
I can’t help it. I laugh when Mari shouts so I can hear while I bring the device to my ear. She’s not psychic. She works the booth across the street from mine. I glance up to witness her blowing me a kiss. Instead of catching it, I bat it back with my middle finger.
A couple stares at me as though I’m crass simply because of my profession. Well, if the gesture fits…
“Don’t you have anybody else to harass? Your regular Tuesday-at-nine customer likes it when you spank him. Save it for someone who will reward your effort.”
Mari sticks her tongue out at me, catching the interest of a young man in ripped jeans who probably couldn’t afford a fifteen-minute session with the high-end workers in this section of the district. Too bad, he seems cute and frisky. Exactly the type Mari prefers and attracts with her lighthearted, playful offering.
“Seriously, Star.” Mari pauses her habitual swaying to meet my gaze across the canal and the river of people passing us by. “Are you all right? I’ve never seen you so solemn. No dancing, no flirting, no smiles for the shy guys…”
“I’m fine.”
“Just lovesick.”
“How the hell did this happen?” I massage the ache at the base of my neck.
“Well, you met this smoking-hot guy who doesn’t seem to mind that you service other men for a living. Then somehow you left him hanging.”
“Mari—”
“Sorry, Star, I’m just joking. Not the right time. I know.” She’s seldom serious and I can’t fault her for it now. Men adore banging her silly. Perky and intelligent don’t often pair up. And it’s not as though she’s entirely wrong. “I hate that you’re hurting. It’s like the time that drunk bastard hit me when I wouldn’t agree to anal and you flew off the handle. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t chased him off with your wicked heels. I just… Let me be here for you?”
“I appreciate the thought. But there’s no bad guy this time. No one to hunt and destroy.”
“More like someone to hold hostage and perform all your tricks for until he sees what a mistake he’s making. Look, maybe Rick’s spending an extended time with his family. You said he’s close to them, right? He headed home for the holidays. I’m sure…”
“I convinced myself that was the case for the first week. The holiday season is peak time around here, sex shows included. Tommy can’t be down his best bouncer for that long. Rick has to be back by now.”
“Do you want me to ask around? I can take a break later tonight and run over there quick. I can be stealthy.”
“What part of daisy dukes and two
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