the only thing I can think of. If I can convince Jeremy to take me to his grave, I can leave him a note. He may or may not see it but it is better than nothing. This is my last hope in keeping Forrest far away from here.
“And why would I want to do that?” He stands and the muscles of his stomach clench while his hands fist at his sides trying to stay in control of his anger. I may even receive a punishment but it would be worth it.
“You have nothing to worry about. I just wanted to say goodbye. I never got the chance to do so before. He has been my best friend since childhood and regardless of my feelings before, he was family.” I try not to tear up. When I saw him lying in a pool of his own blood I knew I had lost him. It was the worst moment of my entire life knowing he died trying to protect me. Now I just want to protect him.
“No. I still don’t trust you enough to take you out of this house. What brought this on?”
“Things have changed and I wanted to let go of my past and embrace my future.” It is partially true but he needs to believe that I am ready to move forward with him.
“I will take you when the time is right but that time is not now or any time soon. I have business to attend to so for now just find something else to do. Go watch one of your girly movies and I will be back later tonight.” My only chance at warning Forrest not to come for me has just been squashed. I just have to hope I can be convincing enough when he comes to rescue me.
I don’t say anything more knowing there is nothing else to be said and head back to my room. Opening up my diary and reading Forrest’s words for the hundredth time it seems, I want to cry with happiness. I have forgotten what it truly meant to be happy. I had pushed Forrest and our love to the back of my mind for so long trying to forget the pain from his death. Now that I know he is alive and well, my heart swells for him. I had convinced myself I was happy here. Knowing my circumstances, it wasn’t hard to find happiness in the little things.
All those times I had freedom to roam the halls without someone one-step behind me, watching my every move. Or the times when Jeremy brought me my favorite movie, takeout, candy, or even a book from my favorite author. I found joy in those simple things. I had mistaken that joy for happiness. I guess being captive, you have to make the most of it and the little things are what keep me living through each day.
I pull out a pen from my desk drawer and start to write in my diary as I have every day since I could write. I put pen to paper and without any real thought, my feelings and thoughts flow through me and onto the paper. In a way, it is freeing. Letting everything out helps me realize my true feelings. I make sure to never mention any names in case Jeremy does decide to read my diary but I think if he were to read my entries now he would know whom I was talking about.
I express every ounce of my love for Forrest, every feeling I have for Jeremy, and all my fears of what could happen to Forrest, Jeremy and I, if Forrest follows through on his promise to rescue me. Forrest’s death is my worst fear but I also fear for Jeremy. I probably shouldn’t and the rational part of my brain is telling me that I shouldn’t care what happens to him but I do care and I don’t want any deaths to be because of me. The fear I have for me is miniscule in comparison but I fear that if I am rescued, and by some chance, Forrest makes it out alive I will no longer be the same. I don’t think I can go back to being his baby girl, not like I had been. Everything has changed. I have been through so much that I don’t know how damaged I am. Will I ever be able to let a man touch me again? Will I ever be able to trust anyone or let anyone into my heart again? Will I ever have a normal relationship or will I be too afraid and screw everything
“And why would I want to do that?” He stands and the muscles of his stomach clench while his hands fist at his sides trying to stay in control of his anger. I may even receive a punishment but it would be worth it.
“You have nothing to worry about. I just wanted to say goodbye. I never got the chance to do so before. He has been my best friend since childhood and regardless of my feelings before, he was family.” I try not to tear up. When I saw him lying in a pool of his own blood I knew I had lost him. It was the worst moment of my entire life knowing he died trying to protect me. Now I just want to protect him.
“No. I still don’t trust you enough to take you out of this house. What brought this on?”
“Things have changed and I wanted to let go of my past and embrace my future.” It is partially true but he needs to believe that I am ready to move forward with him.
“I will take you when the time is right but that time is not now or any time soon. I have business to attend to so for now just find something else to do. Go watch one of your girly movies and I will be back later tonight.” My only chance at warning Forrest not to come for me has just been squashed. I just have to hope I can be convincing enough when he comes to rescue me.
I don’t say anything more knowing there is nothing else to be said and head back to my room. Opening up my diary and reading Forrest’s words for the hundredth time it seems, I want to cry with happiness. I have forgotten what it truly meant to be happy. I had pushed Forrest and our love to the back of my mind for so long trying to forget the pain from his death. Now that I know he is alive and well, my heart swells for him. I had convinced myself I was happy here. Knowing my circumstances, it wasn’t hard to find happiness in the little things.
All those times I had freedom to roam the halls without someone one-step behind me, watching my every move. Or the times when Jeremy brought me my favorite movie, takeout, candy, or even a book from my favorite author. I found joy in those simple things. I had mistaken that joy for happiness. I guess being captive, you have to make the most of it and the little things are what keep me living through each day.
I pull out a pen from my desk drawer and start to write in my diary as I have every day since I could write. I put pen to paper and without any real thought, my feelings and thoughts flow through me and onto the paper. In a way, it is freeing. Letting everything out helps me realize my true feelings. I make sure to never mention any names in case Jeremy does decide to read my diary but I think if he were to read my entries now he would know whom I was talking about.
I express every ounce of my love for Forrest, every feeling I have for Jeremy, and all my fears of what could happen to Forrest, Jeremy and I, if Forrest follows through on his promise to rescue me. Forrest’s death is my worst fear but I also fear for Jeremy. I probably shouldn’t and the rational part of my brain is telling me that I shouldn’t care what happens to him but I do care and I don’t want any deaths to be because of me. The fear I have for me is miniscule in comparison but I fear that if I am rescued, and by some chance, Forrest makes it out alive I will no longer be the same. I don’t think I can go back to being his baby girl, not like I had been. Everything has changed. I have been through so much that I don’t know how damaged I am. Will I ever be able to let a man touch me again? Will I ever be able to trust anyone or let anyone into my heart again? Will I ever have a normal relationship or will I be too afraid and screw everything
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