toward her, lightly planting my lips on hers. I didn’t kiss
her, at least not the way most people think of a kiss. I was just trying to get
as close as possible. I wanted to feel what it was like to have our mouths
touching. Then, when the moment felt right, I pulled away.
“What was that?”
“I don’t really know.”
We both laughed: me, my quiet, deep laugh, and her, her half
baby otter chuckle.
“How far down on your list is finding out more about your
father’s death?”
“It’s the first thing.”
“So…”
“So…” She looked away quickly, deciding the level of
honestly with which she was comfortable. When she looked back, I saw in her
eyes that she trusted me. “I’m just too scared to start it.”
“You don’t seem scared of anything.”
“Everyone has fears.”
“I don’t.”
“Yes, you do.”
“Yes, I do.”
“If you could have any super power, what would it be?”
“Oh, the age old question. You know, normally, I’d say
flight, but right now, I just want to know what you’re thinking.”
“You could just ask me.”
“No, that’s scary.”
“And being able to read my mind outright wouldn’t be?”
“It’s different when you’re asking someone to be honest with
you.”
“How about some wine?”
“So you can’t be honest with me sober?”
“Ha, I’m not sure if you can handle my honesty sober.”
“Okay, wine it is.”
It was one of those screw top bottles, which was perfect,
because we didn’t have a corkscrew. We also didn’t have cups, so we sat up and
took turns swigging sips from the bottle. Between gulps, we played that silly
hand game where one person has their hands on the bottom, and the other on the
top, and the bottom person has to try to slap the top person’s hand before they
can pull away.
It was so stupid and so silly and so perfect.
“You know how they say that women are attracted to men…?”
“Before you continue, who are ‘they’?”
She jokingly scowled at me. “I don’t know. Psychiatrists, I
guess.”
“Oh okay, them, keep going.”
“They say that women are attracted to men who they think
would make good fathers, or at least would have traits they would like to see
in their children.”
“I’m a little nervous about where this conversation is
going.”
“Calm down, boy.” She touched my knee and I could feel her
heat radiate throughout my entire body. “Why do you think women are so drawn to
you?”
“Is this a jab? Or is it an actual question?”
“We’ve been sitting here for four hours, Teddy. Assume it’s
not a jab.”
“Okay then… money, power, security.”
“Wow, okay.”
“What?”
“I don’t know… I expected you to say something about your
looks, your body, your charm.”
“Do you want to say something about my looks, my body, or my
charm?” I egged her on, prying for a compliment.
“I don’t need to boost your ego right now.”
“Later?”
“Maybe later.”
I grabbed her face and brought her in for a kiss. It was
random, a complete surprise to both of us, but it just made sense.
“What was that for?”
“Assume I don’t know.”
“I’m not buying that.”
“Or assume that while I am honestly loving everything about
this, and while I know I asked for this, my body is struggling to be so close
to you without… you know.”
“What?” I saw her smile whip across her face.
“Oh, don’t make me say it.”
Her eyes widened with playfulness. “Teddy, I honestly don’t
know what you’re talking about.”
She knew. And because of that, I allowed myself my next
move. I swooped over on top of her, pushing her to the ground while I rested my
full weight on top of her. My one hand moved behind her head, while the other
grabbed her hip. I lowered my face to hers, longing to feel the warmth of her
breath.
“Do you know what I’m talking about now?” I growled.
“If I say ‘no’, will you show me?”
She was
her, at least not the way most people think of a kiss. I was just trying to get
as close as possible. I wanted to feel what it was like to have our mouths
touching. Then, when the moment felt right, I pulled away.
“What was that?”
“I don’t really know.”
We both laughed: me, my quiet, deep laugh, and her, her half
baby otter chuckle.
“How far down on your list is finding out more about your
father’s death?”
“It’s the first thing.”
“So…”
“So…” She looked away quickly, deciding the level of
honestly with which she was comfortable. When she looked back, I saw in her
eyes that she trusted me. “I’m just too scared to start it.”
“You don’t seem scared of anything.”
“Everyone has fears.”
“I don’t.”
“Yes, you do.”
“Yes, I do.”
“If you could have any super power, what would it be?”
“Oh, the age old question. You know, normally, I’d say
flight, but right now, I just want to know what you’re thinking.”
“You could just ask me.”
“No, that’s scary.”
“And being able to read my mind outright wouldn’t be?”
“It’s different when you’re asking someone to be honest with
you.”
“How about some wine?”
“So you can’t be honest with me sober?”
“Ha, I’m not sure if you can handle my honesty sober.”
“Okay, wine it is.”
It was one of those screw top bottles, which was perfect,
because we didn’t have a corkscrew. We also didn’t have cups, so we sat up and
took turns swigging sips from the bottle. Between gulps, we played that silly
hand game where one person has their hands on the bottom, and the other on the
top, and the bottom person has to try to slap the top person’s hand before they
can pull away.
It was so stupid and so silly and so perfect.
“You know how they say that women are attracted to men…?”
“Before you continue, who are ‘they’?”
She jokingly scowled at me. “I don’t know. Psychiatrists, I
guess.”
“Oh okay, them, keep going.”
“They say that women are attracted to men who they think
would make good fathers, or at least would have traits they would like to see
in their children.”
“I’m a little nervous about where this conversation is
going.”
“Calm down, boy.” She touched my knee and I could feel her
heat radiate throughout my entire body. “Why do you think women are so drawn to
you?”
“Is this a jab? Or is it an actual question?”
“We’ve been sitting here for four hours, Teddy. Assume it’s
not a jab.”
“Okay then… money, power, security.”
“Wow, okay.”
“What?”
“I don’t know… I expected you to say something about your
looks, your body, your charm.”
“Do you want to say something about my looks, my body, or my
charm?” I egged her on, prying for a compliment.
“I don’t need to boost your ego right now.”
“Later?”
“Maybe later.”
I grabbed her face and brought her in for a kiss. It was
random, a complete surprise to both of us, but it just made sense.
“What was that for?”
“Assume I don’t know.”
“I’m not buying that.”
“Or assume that while I am honestly loving everything about
this, and while I know I asked for this, my body is struggling to be so close
to you without… you know.”
“What?” I saw her smile whip across her face.
“Oh, don’t make me say it.”
Her eyes widened with playfulness. “Teddy, I honestly don’t
know what you’re talking about.”
She knew. And because of that, I allowed myself my next
move. I swooped over on top of her, pushing her to the ground while I rested my
full weight on top of her. My one hand moved behind her head, while the other
grabbed her hip. I lowered my face to hers, longing to feel the warmth of her
breath.
“Do you know what I’m talking about now?” I growled.
“If I say ‘no’, will you show me?”
She was
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