Remember Satan was once an angel of God, so Bubba is an angel, but just which side is sometimes debatable. Just joking. I know he can be very trying sometimes, and you have kept your cool way better than I ever could have. Our kids are so lucky to have you as their mother. So am I.
I cannot wait to get back into your arms. Talking about it tonight felt so good. Knowing that this whole thing is coming to an end. I dream about the day I step off that plane to see you. Hope you have no plans for the rest of your life, because youâre gonna be a little busy. I miss you so much!!!
I loved talking to Bubba tonight. I love hearing him tell me he loves me, but I also donât want to force him to say it. I know inside that he loves me. He just gets a little busy with everything going on around him. I canât wait to play with him and chase him around the house. I was also thinking, all this time Iâve been wanting to talk to Bubba because he can talk back to me, but I want Angel to hear my voice, too. I want her to be a little familiar with me if at least my voice.
Anyway, I love you with all my heart, and canât wait to see you again. I am gonna smother you like crazy. Youâll be begging me to go on another deployment so you can get a little break. Too bad. Youâre stuck with me now. I love you, sexy!
XOXOXOXOXOXOOX
The danger Chris and the others were in had become less theoretical for me after Marc and Ryan went down. Yet I still tried to keep the idea of it at bay. I didnât want to worry. And, I told myself, the last thing Chris needed from me was fear. If he knew I was worrying, he might worry, too. The distraction might be enough to get him killed.
Our conversations circled around the reality of where he was. We talked about things at home because they were safe; no one was in danger of getting shot or blown up.
I knew there were bullets flying all around him. I just became very good at not focusing on that part of the picture when we spoke.
Laterâmuch, much laterâChris told me a story about being confronted by two insurgents while he and a friend were in a back alley relieving themselves.
There was a moment of stunned silenceâhe guessed the pair might have been about to do the same thingâthen everyone grabbed for their guns.
Chris pulled his pistol from his drop holster first; he shot the others dead.
âIâm damn glad youâre a quick draw,â I told him.
A postscript on Ryan: Ryan did recover, but he was left permanently blind. His girlfriend Kelly stayed by his side through his recovery, and they soon married.
Iâm happy to say that we all became good friends. Ryan had an indomitable spirit that infected everyone he met. He used to say that he suspected God had chosen him to be wounded, rather than someone else, because He knew he could bear it. If so, it was an excellent choice, for Ryan inspired many others to deal with their own handicaps as he dealt with his. He went hunting with the help of friends and special devices. His wound inspired the logo Chris would later use for his company; it was a way for Chris to continue honoring him.
Ryan and his wife were expecting their first child in 2009 when Ryan went into the hospital for what seemed like a routine operation, part of follow-up treatment for his wounds. Tragically, he ended up dying.
I remember looking at his wife at the funeral, so brave yet so devastated, and wondering to myself how we could live in such a cruel world.
My enduring vision of Ryan is outside one of the hospitals where he was recovering from an operation. He was in his wheelchair with some of the Team guys. Head bandaged and clearly in pain, he asked to be pointed toward the American flag that flew in the hospital yard; once there, he held his hand up in a long and poignant salute, still a patriot.
BACK WITH US
It may not have been directly related to my fears for Chris when he was gone, but I grew more apprehensive
I cannot wait to get back into your arms. Talking about it tonight felt so good. Knowing that this whole thing is coming to an end. I dream about the day I step off that plane to see you. Hope you have no plans for the rest of your life, because youâre gonna be a little busy. I miss you so much!!!
I loved talking to Bubba tonight. I love hearing him tell me he loves me, but I also donât want to force him to say it. I know inside that he loves me. He just gets a little busy with everything going on around him. I canât wait to play with him and chase him around the house. I was also thinking, all this time Iâve been wanting to talk to Bubba because he can talk back to me, but I want Angel to hear my voice, too. I want her to be a little familiar with me if at least my voice.
Anyway, I love you with all my heart, and canât wait to see you again. I am gonna smother you like crazy. Youâll be begging me to go on another deployment so you can get a little break. Too bad. Youâre stuck with me now. I love you, sexy!
XOXOXOXOXOXOOX
The danger Chris and the others were in had become less theoretical for me after Marc and Ryan went down. Yet I still tried to keep the idea of it at bay. I didnât want to worry. And, I told myself, the last thing Chris needed from me was fear. If he knew I was worrying, he might worry, too. The distraction might be enough to get him killed.
Our conversations circled around the reality of where he was. We talked about things at home because they were safe; no one was in danger of getting shot or blown up.
I knew there were bullets flying all around him. I just became very good at not focusing on that part of the picture when we spoke.
Laterâmuch, much laterâChris told me a story about being confronted by two insurgents while he and a friend were in a back alley relieving themselves.
There was a moment of stunned silenceâhe guessed the pair might have been about to do the same thingâthen everyone grabbed for their guns.
Chris pulled his pistol from his drop holster first; he shot the others dead.
âIâm damn glad youâre a quick draw,â I told him.
A postscript on Ryan: Ryan did recover, but he was left permanently blind. His girlfriend Kelly stayed by his side through his recovery, and they soon married.
Iâm happy to say that we all became good friends. Ryan had an indomitable spirit that infected everyone he met. He used to say that he suspected God had chosen him to be wounded, rather than someone else, because He knew he could bear it. If so, it was an excellent choice, for Ryan inspired many others to deal with their own handicaps as he dealt with his. He went hunting with the help of friends and special devices. His wound inspired the logo Chris would later use for his company; it was a way for Chris to continue honoring him.
Ryan and his wife were expecting their first child in 2009 when Ryan went into the hospital for what seemed like a routine operation, part of follow-up treatment for his wounds. Tragically, he ended up dying.
I remember looking at his wife at the funeral, so brave yet so devastated, and wondering to myself how we could live in such a cruel world.
My enduring vision of Ryan is outside one of the hospitals where he was recovering from an operation. He was in his wheelchair with some of the Team guys. Head bandaged and clearly in pain, he asked to be pointed toward the American flag that flew in the hospital yard; once there, he held his hand up in a long and poignant salute, still a patriot.
BACK WITH US
It may not have been directly related to my fears for Chris when he was gone, but I grew more apprehensive
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