eight-hundred
pounds of BS in the middle of our living room.
“He’s
got a name,” Farrah said in a huffy tone. “It’s simply not common knowledge
yet.”
“Huh?”
said Levi.
“I’ve
named him, but I’m waiting for the stars to properly align before I speak it to
the Universe. There’s a time for every purpose under heaven, you know.”
“When
will the stars align?” I said. I didn’t want to seem pushy, but I was hoping
she’d say, ‘when I’ve been granted legal guardianship’ or something along those
lines. Instead, she said, “When Aries is in ascendance and Libra in
retrograde.”
Seemed
the guardianship thing was too much to hope for.
With
Farrah and Baby settled in, Levi roared away in his truck. Steve had given him
a six-pack of Bikini Blonde Lager from the Maui Brewing Company for his trouble.
“He
used a quarter tank of gas and two hours of his time you give him a measly six-pack?”
I said.
“No
worries. Levi’s easy. He’s new in town and doesn’t know the ropes. I promised I’d
introduce him around.”
“What
is this, the rainbow coalition mafia? You gotta have ‘introductions’ and learn
‘the ropes’?”
“Hey,
not everyone qualifies to hang out with us. I keep it strictly friends-only.
That way, if anybody messes up, the injured party knows I’ll do something about
it.”
“Sure,
Guido, whatever,” I said.
I
offered to buy him lunch since he’d offered to drive me down to my shop in
Pa’ia to pick up my car.
“I
really appreciate you going along with this baby thing,” I said as we hunkered
into a big basket of fish and chips at the Pa’ia Fish Market.
“Remember,
this isn’t long-term. They’re both history before the kid needs a high chair,”
he said. “You pinkie swore.”
“I’m
worried Farrah’s time with this baby will be way short of a high chair,” I
said. “I talked to Sifu Doug and he freaked me out talking about kidnapping. He
offered to call his brother. Hopefully James can give Farrah some legal advice on
what she needs to do.”
“Couldn’t
Farrah just go the hanai route? I mean, your Auntie Mana raised you and
your brother as hanai kids without being legally adopted.”
“True.
But it wasn’t like Auntie Mana just glommed on to us. First off, we were older
and we knew her. And I’m sure my mom’s friends all spoke up for Mana with the
authorities. Farrah doesn’t even know who the mother is. It’s totally different.”
“Would
you go to bat for Farrah?”
“Of
course. That’s why I asked Sifu Doug to call the lawyer. But James is an
officer of the court. He can’t play ‘Let’s Make a Deal’ with a human being.
He’s got to follow the rules.”
“What
do you think will happen?”
I
shrugged. “I know what I’d like to have happen. But we’re talking about Farrah.
She tends to turn left when the sign points right. I’m just hoping she’ll come
around and do what she needs to do. Otherwise, I’m afraid this whole thing
could turn out to be pretty painful.”
“For
everybody,” he said.
“Yeah,
for everybody.”
We
finished our fish and chips in silence. I thanked him again for helping Farrah
move in and then I went to my shop. When I got inside, the phone message light
was blinking. I punched in the code for my voicemail and learned I had a message
from an hour earlier.
It was
Eleanor. “Pali,” she wailed. “Where are you? How could you abandon me in my
hour of need? Get back to me right away.”
I
called the hotel and asked for her room.
When Eleanor
answered, her voice was so cold I thought the phone might ice over “Do you
think you could find time in your busy day to see me?” she said.
“Certainly.
Do you want me to come down there or do you want to meet here at the shop?”
“I
think since I’m the paying customer you should make the effort to come
to me,” she said.
“No
worries. I’m on my way. Would you like us to meet in the lobby or in your
room?”
“What’s
with all
pounds of BS in the middle of our living room.
“He’s
got a name,” Farrah said in a huffy tone. “It’s simply not common knowledge
yet.”
“Huh?”
said Levi.
“I’ve
named him, but I’m waiting for the stars to properly align before I speak it to
the Universe. There’s a time for every purpose under heaven, you know.”
“When
will the stars align?” I said. I didn’t want to seem pushy, but I was hoping
she’d say, ‘when I’ve been granted legal guardianship’ or something along those
lines. Instead, she said, “When Aries is in ascendance and Libra in
retrograde.”
Seemed
the guardianship thing was too much to hope for.
With
Farrah and Baby settled in, Levi roared away in his truck. Steve had given him
a six-pack of Bikini Blonde Lager from the Maui Brewing Company for his trouble.
“He
used a quarter tank of gas and two hours of his time you give him a measly six-pack?”
I said.
“No
worries. Levi’s easy. He’s new in town and doesn’t know the ropes. I promised I’d
introduce him around.”
“What
is this, the rainbow coalition mafia? You gotta have ‘introductions’ and learn
‘the ropes’?”
“Hey,
not everyone qualifies to hang out with us. I keep it strictly friends-only.
That way, if anybody messes up, the injured party knows I’ll do something about
it.”
“Sure,
Guido, whatever,” I said.
I
offered to buy him lunch since he’d offered to drive me down to my shop in
Pa’ia to pick up my car.
“I
really appreciate you going along with this baby thing,” I said as we hunkered
into a big basket of fish and chips at the Pa’ia Fish Market.
“Remember,
this isn’t long-term. They’re both history before the kid needs a high chair,”
he said. “You pinkie swore.”
“I’m
worried Farrah’s time with this baby will be way short of a high chair,” I
said. “I talked to Sifu Doug and he freaked me out talking about kidnapping. He
offered to call his brother. Hopefully James can give Farrah some legal advice on
what she needs to do.”
“Couldn’t
Farrah just go the hanai route? I mean, your Auntie Mana raised you and
your brother as hanai kids without being legally adopted.”
“True.
But it wasn’t like Auntie Mana just glommed on to us. First off, we were older
and we knew her. And I’m sure my mom’s friends all spoke up for Mana with the
authorities. Farrah doesn’t even know who the mother is. It’s totally different.”
“Would
you go to bat for Farrah?”
“Of
course. That’s why I asked Sifu Doug to call the lawyer. But James is an
officer of the court. He can’t play ‘Let’s Make a Deal’ with a human being.
He’s got to follow the rules.”
“What
do you think will happen?”
I
shrugged. “I know what I’d like to have happen. But we’re talking about Farrah.
She tends to turn left when the sign points right. I’m just hoping she’ll come
around and do what she needs to do. Otherwise, I’m afraid this whole thing
could turn out to be pretty painful.”
“For
everybody,” he said.
“Yeah,
for everybody.”
We
finished our fish and chips in silence. I thanked him again for helping Farrah
move in and then I went to my shop. When I got inside, the phone message light
was blinking. I punched in the code for my voicemail and learned I had a message
from an hour earlier.
It was
Eleanor. “Pali,” she wailed. “Where are you? How could you abandon me in my
hour of need? Get back to me right away.”
I
called the hotel and asked for her room.
When Eleanor
answered, her voice was so cold I thought the phone might ice over “Do you
think you could find time in your busy day to see me?” she said.
“Certainly.
Do you want me to come down there or do you want to meet here at the shop?”
“I
think since I’m the paying customer you should make the effort to come
to me,” she said.
“No
worries. I’m on my way. Would you like us to meet in the lobby or in your
room?”
“What’s
with all
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