turning-space—the same turning-space that is now, beneath him, a lacework of ruffled puddles—he’d had the impossible thought that this figure in a uniform might be Tom.
Jack had felt himself starting to tremble again, under Major Richards’s gaze, as he’d done under Ellie’s gaze when they’d both first read the letter, and he’d started to want Major Richards to leave.
But Major Richards, now handing Jack a number of papers from his wallet, which were Jack’s copies to keep, had begun to explain that ‘because of the circumstances on the ground’ it was not possible to say as yet exactly when Corporal Luxton would be repatriated, but that it would be soon and that Jack would be kept closely informed. There would be a ceremony, of course, and all due assistance would subsequently be given, following the coroner’s release, in whatever funeral arrangements might be decided upon. Meanwhile, Jack shouldn’t hesitate to call at any time.
This was adding little to what had been said in the letter, and Jack was able to wonder, as Major Richards spoke, whether the unspecified delay and the word ‘circumstances’ and that strange phrase ‘on the ground’ (where else did circumstances happen?) might all be to do with the fact that there was no body really, or not in the usual sense of that word, or that the manner of Corporal Luxton’s death, and his comrades’, might not have beenso instant after all. That the ‘incident’—that word had been used at some point—required the army’s own careful investigation. No one yet had used the word ‘body’.
But mainly Jack was trying to control the trembling of his own body.
Perhaps Major Richards saw this. He saw anyway (and he was not unpractised in this observation) that this visit, though there were other matters still to be dealt with, shouldn’t be extended very much further. He’d brought with him, for example, just in case, copies of recent photographs of Corporal Luxton, but he quickly calculated that this wouldn’t be the moment to produce them from his wallet. The principal purpose of his visit, that it should simply have been made, was fulfilled. The battalion had been represented in person and in uniform. This, Major Richards knew, was, among his several duties, the most important and most symbolic, and often the most difficult. But Major Richards was only too aware that soldiers had to do far tougher things.
It was now very unlikely that Major Richards, who quite frequently regretted the course of his career and the fact that he was not by now a colonel, would be called upon to do those far tougher things. And, of course, demanding as it was, being the messenger was far easier than being the receiver. He made conscious efforts to remind himself of this.
On a number of occasions now—and recently these occasions had intensified—Major Richards had been required to announce the actual news in person himself. Of a death (not so often, thank goodness), of a woundingor hospitalisation. Since, with the army’s increasing tendency to merge regiments, his duties effectively operated at brigade level (though he still thought of himself as ‘First Battalion’) and since he’d been deemed good at them, he was not inexperienced. There could be a wife, small children. Or just parents, brothers, sisters. The average age of a soldier meant that his family might very often still all be in one place. This could be both convenient and not. You might walk in on some cluttered, ordinary domestic scene. Everyday havoc. They would always look guilty and apologise for the mess.
He’d taught himself always to look them directly in the eye. Of course, it helped you, but didn’t help them, that they invariably guessed why you were there, as soon as they saw you in your cap. They often even said the words for you: the worst words—which he might be able to correct. Not killed, no. But if it was the worst, or even not (not killed, no, just paralysed) then the
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