When You Least Expect It by Sandra Leiper Page A

deserve one!  You made me see that.  You brought me back to life.  Not because I think we have a chance to have a life together, but because I think I have a chance to have a life.  To be happy with myself so that just maybe, I can find someone I can be happy with.  I know it’s out there.  I just want the chance to find it.”  Ray was holding the phone so hard his knuckles were white.  He was willing her to believe him.  He could not fathom losing her before he had the chance to find her.
                  “You will.”  Amanda’s voice was barely a whisper.  “You’ll find yourself again, and then, one day, when you least expect it, you will find that special someone.  The person you are supposed to be with.  Then, miraculously everything will make sense.  I want that for you.”
                  “I want that for you too, Mandy. I know it’s the wrong time for us.  But can’t we just be friends, and maybe, the right time will come along?  If not, do you have so many friends, you couldn’t use one more?”  Ray held his breath.  Why did he feel like in her answer lie his destiny?    He prayed he had gotten through to her.
                  “Alright, Ray, I give.  We can be friends.  But that’s it.  No more love talk or soul mates or anything.  Just two people on the Internet, chatting.”  She knew she would have just as hard a time as Ray living up to this.  But she felt it needed to be done.  If and when he left his wife they could think about more, but not until then.  “So what do you say, buddy?”
                  He knew whether he liked it or not, this was going to be the best he could get.  It was better than not having her around at all, so reluctantly he agreed.  “Ok, you win.  From here on out, Internet pals we are. We can still talk on the phone though, right?” 
                  She considered this for a minute.  “Ray, if your wife were calling some man and talking to her at all hours, how would you feel?  Would it bother you?  Would you feel like she was cheating on you?”  She knew she was hitting below the belt, but she wanted him to understand where she was coming from.  “I know I wouldn’t want my husband talking to some woman he met online”.
                  Ray had heard enough.  “Look, how many times do I have to tell you we don’t have a normal marriage?  If I did, then probably no, I wouldn’t be talking to you.  I wouldn’t want her talking to men she found online.  I would be having a life with her.  As it stands, nothing about my life is normal.  I’m not looking forward to dismantling eighteen years of marriage…but I’m tired of wasting my life.”  Ray was very angry at this point and went on without thinking.  “If you don’t understand that, then maybe we should just not talk anymore.  I need support right now, not someone overanalyzing every aspect of my screwed up life.  I don’t feel guilty about you, I feel reborn. Maybe it’s wrong, but I don’t care. I don’t know how else I can explain my situation to you.  Either you believe me or you don’t, but I’m telling you the truth.  It’s up to you, Mandy.”  Ray knew he had probably gone too far, but there was no turning back at this point.
                  “Crazy as it sounds, I do believe you.  I’m not going to pretend I think its right, but I think you’ve pretty much made up your mind.  I’ll try and be a supportive friend.  You do what you have to do.”  She let out a long sigh.  For the hundredth time, she wondered how she got herself in this situation.  Like it or not, she already was Ray’s friend and would never desert him when he needed her.
                  Ray was so relieved.  He wanted to shout from the rooftops, or do a little jig.  He wanted to get on his knees and thank God.  Instead he just answered, “Great.” He then started