When You Don't See Me by Timothy James Beck Page B

What have you heard?”
    â€œI don’t care if you are,” she said. She pulled me into the bathroom and shut the door. “I’ve got a problem.”
    â€œOh God. Is this a female thing? Why do women feel compelled to tell their gay friends everything that happens down there?”
    She blushed and stammered, “Oh. I guess you’re right. You probably don’t want to—I’m sorry.”
    I sighed. “Go on. What is it? Does it burn when you pee?” Kendra looked as though I’d just slapped a scarlet P on her crotch. “Really? Gosh,” I said. “I was just kidding.”
    â€œBelieve me, it’s not that funny,” she whispered.
    â€œDoes Morgan have any cranberry juice? Isn’t that supposed to help?”
    Kendra folded her arms and said, “Right, Nick. It burns when I pee, so I’ll drink something that’s going to make me pee even more.”
    â€œI don’t know! I’m not a doctor!” I shrieked.
    â€œShut up!” she hissed. “I don’t want the whole building to know. This is so embarrassing. What am I going to do? I don’t have insurance. I can’t afford to see a doctor. I don’t even know if I can pay rent. Again. I still owe you for last time.”
    â€œIt’s okay,” I mumbled. Suddenly I didn’t feel as bad about my life as I had earlier. “My final paycheck from I Dream of Cleanie arrived in the mail the other day. I’ll float you a loan until you get paid again.”
    A knock on the door made us both jump. I nearly fell off the toilet seat. Kendra cautiously opened the door. Roberto’s hand came into the room, holding a slip of paper. As Kendra took the note, I heard Roberto say, “They’re open for another hour. It’s not far, but if you get a cab, you’ll get there in plenty of time for someone to see you.”
    â€œOkay,” Kendra mumbled. Roberto’s hand popped into the room again, this time offering a twenty-dollar bill and a condom. Kendra stuffed them both into her pocket and weakly said, “Thanks.”
    â€œI’ll go with you,” I offered.
    Halfway down the stairs, I realized that I’d forgotten my wallet. I told Kendra I’d meet her on the corner and ran back for it. Roberto and JC were watching a game on TV. As I searched a pile of dirty jeans for my wallet, I heard JC say, “That chick you live with’s hot. You hittin’ that?”
    I stopped what I was doing and waited for the answer.
    â€œNah,” was all Roberto said.
    I found my wallet on top of a milk crate by the futon. I stuffed it in my back pocket and ran downstairs.
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    The address Roberto had given Kendra led us to a clinic near Columbia University. It wasn’t a free clinic, but they charged on a sliding scale. Kendra tried to haggle with them, but changed her tune when they referred her to the free clinic and said it wouldn’t be open until the next day. She mumbled something about it being a burning issue and followed a nurse into an examining room.
    I flipped through the magazines in the waiting room. A picture of Sheila Meyers caught my eye. Sheila was one of my uncle’s best friends. I read the box of text and smiled.
    Sheila Meyers, the spokesmodel for Lillith Allure Cosmetics who’s currently filming scenes for a movie version of That Girl (Meyers will portray Ruth Bauman during the first half of the movie. Tina Yothers continues the role in the film’s second half.), on recent rumors that she’s a transsexual: “Nobody wants to hear a model say she was born in the wrong body. That’s a step beyond ‘Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful.’ Maybe I am a transsexual. Would it matter? We’re all human. Sexuality doesn’t demand a cure.”
    â€œNick?”
    I looked up, expecting to see a nurse or doctor who’d come to inform me that Kendra’s condition had taken a