is the time and place you have chosen to propose to me?’
BUMP!
Her face went into Hari’s chest again. She was getting angry now. Her special moment was already ruined and to make it worse, Hari kept talking.
‘Tia, we have been going out for four years now, and it is no secret that I like sleeping with you … er … I mean I like being with you. I love you actually. Yeah, love is the correct feel …’
To say that Hari was drunk would have been an understatement.
Tia cut him off.
‘Hari, please stop! Please don’t propose to me here …’
But Hari was too excited to stop.
‘C’mon,
yaar
, we always knew we were going to marry each other. This is just a formality. Why don’t you just say yes? I gotta pee too …’
Things would have been salvageable had Hari not ventured into giving Tia that last bit of information. But the venue … ugh … there was too much alcohol, the smell of urine, people cursing … plus he was rushing her so that he could relieve himself! All of this in the middle of her marriage proposal. Tia was heartbroken. The expression of her long-held dream was shattered; a forever-anticipated moment ruined by this goofy guy. To make the matters worse, a tall, fat, hairy biker dude bumped into her. Tia screamed.
‘Just stop, Hari, you’re drunk!’
Hari looked around.
‘Everybody is drunk here.’
Laughing, he grabbed her hand and forced the ring onto her finger.
‘People, people!’ he announced to anyone who could hear. ‘We are getting married!’
Tia looked around with anticipation, hoping that others would clap, congratulate them, smile at them, pat them on the back. Maybe a couple of thumbs up? But nobody gave a shit as they walked past. In fact, one woman even gave Hari the middle finger. Hari screamed at her.
‘Yeah, you just wish the ring was on your finger, bitch.’
Tia, meanwhile, was beyond hurt.
Hari, meanwhile, still wanted to pee badly.
‘You wait here, I’ll be back!’ he called as he entered the men’s toilets.
Tia looked at her finger, her ring. It had a very, very small … extremely tiny … diamond. She brought her hand up for a closer look when
BUMP!
, someone bumped into her from behind again, and she hit her head on her hand.
Monday night — Tia’s apartment
Back in her apartment, a smile came upon her as she recalled Hari’s proposal. Although she had always secretly hoped that Hari would propose to her in a romantic setup, she had kept the ring nonetheless. Now, looking at it, she smiled and before she knew it she had fallen asleep wearing Hari’s ring on her wedding finger. This is what she did some nights, putting herself to sleep thinking about her upcoming
band baja baraat
wedding.
Monday night — On the plane for India
Hari was dreading what every long-distance flier worries about. Who is going to be sitting next to me? And he wanted a drink, pronto. He was upset with Tia.
You fight with your own family, you want to hold grudges, but you want me to go and meet them, invite them for our wedding. That’s selfish, Tia.
He also hated her for unpacking his suitcase and repacking it her way. He didn’t like the idea of her choosing his underwear.
And just for that, I am not going to wear the shirt you bought, Tia. Ha, you say I look American in it! I am American, bitch!
This was how Hari usually argued with Tia — mostly in his head. He must have been mumbling because he suddenly realized he was not alone. He was in the middle seat and unfortunately sitting next to him was an oversized middle-aged aunty going to Delhi. Fortunately, after three pegs of whiskey, she became the best person to be next to. The aunty was having whiskey; he was nursing a vodka, his first. The aunty regaled Hari with stories about herself and her fitness freak husband.
‘I
toh
go to India just to pig out on food. When in L.A., he doesn’t let me eat only. I am not boring you,
na
? Just tell me if I am boring you …’
She was excited to have a nice
BUMP!
Her face went into Hari’s chest again. She was getting angry now. Her special moment was already ruined and to make it worse, Hari kept talking.
‘Tia, we have been going out for four years now, and it is no secret that I like sleeping with you … er … I mean I like being with you. I love you actually. Yeah, love is the correct feel …’
To say that Hari was drunk would have been an understatement.
Tia cut him off.
‘Hari, please stop! Please don’t propose to me here …’
But Hari was too excited to stop.
‘C’mon,
yaar
, we always knew we were going to marry each other. This is just a formality. Why don’t you just say yes? I gotta pee too …’
Things would have been salvageable had Hari not ventured into giving Tia that last bit of information. But the venue … ugh … there was too much alcohol, the smell of urine, people cursing … plus he was rushing her so that he could relieve himself! All of this in the middle of her marriage proposal. Tia was heartbroken. The expression of her long-held dream was shattered; a forever-anticipated moment ruined by this goofy guy. To make the matters worse, a tall, fat, hairy biker dude bumped into her. Tia screamed.
‘Just stop, Hari, you’re drunk!’
Hari looked around.
‘Everybody is drunk here.’
Laughing, he grabbed her hand and forced the ring onto her finger.
‘People, people!’ he announced to anyone who could hear. ‘We are getting married!’
Tia looked around with anticipation, hoping that others would clap, congratulate them, smile at them, pat them on the back. Maybe a couple of thumbs up? But nobody gave a shit as they walked past. In fact, one woman even gave Hari the middle finger. Hari screamed at her.
‘Yeah, you just wish the ring was on your finger, bitch.’
Tia, meanwhile, was beyond hurt.
Hari, meanwhile, still wanted to pee badly.
‘You wait here, I’ll be back!’ he called as he entered the men’s toilets.
Tia looked at her finger, her ring. It had a very, very small … extremely tiny … diamond. She brought her hand up for a closer look when
BUMP!
, someone bumped into her from behind again, and she hit her head on her hand.
Monday night — Tia’s apartment
Back in her apartment, a smile came upon her as she recalled Hari’s proposal. Although she had always secretly hoped that Hari would propose to her in a romantic setup, she had kept the ring nonetheless. Now, looking at it, she smiled and before she knew it she had fallen asleep wearing Hari’s ring on her wedding finger. This is what she did some nights, putting herself to sleep thinking about her upcoming
band baja baraat
wedding.
Monday night — On the plane for India
Hari was dreading what every long-distance flier worries about. Who is going to be sitting next to me? And he wanted a drink, pronto. He was upset with Tia.
You fight with your own family, you want to hold grudges, but you want me to go and meet them, invite them for our wedding. That’s selfish, Tia.
He also hated her for unpacking his suitcase and repacking it her way. He didn’t like the idea of her choosing his underwear.
And just for that, I am not going to wear the shirt you bought, Tia. Ha, you say I look American in it! I am American, bitch!
This was how Hari usually argued with Tia — mostly in his head. He must have been mumbling because he suddenly realized he was not alone. He was in the middle seat and unfortunately sitting next to him was an oversized middle-aged aunty going to Delhi. Fortunately, after three pegs of whiskey, she became the best person to be next to. The aunty was having whiskey; he was nursing a vodka, his first. The aunty regaled Hari with stories about herself and her fitness freak husband.
‘I
toh
go to India just to pig out on food. When in L.A., he doesn’t let me eat only. I am not boring you,
na
? Just tell me if I am boring you …’
She was excited to have a nice
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