sorry.”
He lifted his head and turned to her, and any words she’d been about to utter dissolved in the face of the smoldering emotion in his eyes. She’d never seen him look that way.
Never.
He gripped the railing with one hand, as though the solid contact helped center him. Restrain him. “I’ve always treated you with the utmost respect. With care and consideration.”
She swallowed at the vehement words. “Yes, you have.”
“I’ve never presumed to take our relationship a direction we weren’t ready for.” His gaze burned into her. “That
you
weren’t ready for.”
“Mason, please—” She reached out to touch his arm, but he pulled away.
“I’m only human, Kyla.”
The hoarse quality of those words stunned her. How had she ever been so foolish as to think this man dispassionate?
Because you mistook control for not caring
.
On the heels of that truth, came another.
And because you mistook your emotion—or lack thereof—for his
.
She cringed. Wanted to deny it. And couldn’t. Her gaze lowered to the deck rail. Had she ever felt this miserable?
Oh, yes. She had. But not in a very, very long time.
Berto
.
Kyla’s fingers dug into the railing. No! She would not go there. Would not think of him. Would
not
allow those memories to taunt her now.
You loved him
.
It took all her will to hold back a bitter laugh. She’d been young. An utter fool controlled by her emotions. Controlled—and destroyed.
Memories started to flow. Images of faces she hadn’t allowed herself to recall for years.
No. Stop!
She gritted her teeth, forcing the scenes away, back into the recesses of her mind. Berto was in the past. She was done with him. With the mistakes. With being a fool.
Tears slipped free, despite her best efforts to restrain them. Fine, let them fall. But she wasn’t giving way to the memories. Not for a second. They were over and done with. That the merest hint of them made her cry only firmed Kyla’s resolve.
Nothing would ever hurt her like that again.
NINE
“All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them.”
G ALILEO
“Lord, when doubts fill my mind, when my heart is in turmoil, quiet me.”
P SALM 94:19 (TLB)
K yla, I didn’t mean to hurt you. Please, don’t cry.”
Mason’s voice, so remorseful, so
astonished
, gripped her, making it hard to choke out words. “I’m sorry. Oh, Mason. I’m so sorry.”
At her wretched whisper, gentle hands closed on her arms. She let him pull her close against his chest, cradle her there, stroke the back of her head. “It’s all right, Kyla. It’s all right.”
His voice was familiar again, even and calm. She burrowed her face into his chest. “Mason, what’s
wrong
with me?”
He slid an arm around her shoulders and led her back inside. They sat on the couch, his arm still around her. She leaned into him. If only she could close her eyes and erase the evening. The day. The month.
The year.
“Are you really so unhappy?”
She snuffled against him. “I don’t know. I’m just so … weary.”
“I’ve seen that, for weeks. Maybe even months.” His arm tightened, as though to shelter her. “I’ve been worried about you.”
She pulled back at that and looked up at him. “You have? But you never said anything.”
The smile that tugged at his lips was as ironic as it was brief. “Would it have done any good?”
They both knew the answer to that.
“Kyla.” Lines appeared in his forehead, and she could tell he chose his words with care. “Have you ever considered—” He looked away. “No, never mind.”
Kyla tugged at his shirt front. “What?”
“It’s not fair of me to even suggest it.”
She watched the play of emotions on his face, disquiet wrestling with deference. Kyla’s heart warmed. She really didn’t deserve this man. “Mason, please. Tell me. What’s on your mind?”
“Why don’t you just give it up?”
Her lips twitched. “What? Stress?
He lifted his head and turned to her, and any words she’d been about to utter dissolved in the face of the smoldering emotion in his eyes. She’d never seen him look that way.
Never.
He gripped the railing with one hand, as though the solid contact helped center him. Restrain him. “I’ve always treated you with the utmost respect. With care and consideration.”
She swallowed at the vehement words. “Yes, you have.”
“I’ve never presumed to take our relationship a direction we weren’t ready for.” His gaze burned into her. “That
you
weren’t ready for.”
“Mason, please—” She reached out to touch his arm, but he pulled away.
“I’m only human, Kyla.”
The hoarse quality of those words stunned her. How had she ever been so foolish as to think this man dispassionate?
Because you mistook control for not caring
.
On the heels of that truth, came another.
And because you mistook your emotion—or lack thereof—for his
.
She cringed. Wanted to deny it. And couldn’t. Her gaze lowered to the deck rail. Had she ever felt this miserable?
Oh, yes. She had. But not in a very, very long time.
Berto
.
Kyla’s fingers dug into the railing. No! She would not go there. Would not think of him. Would
not
allow those memories to taunt her now.
You loved him
.
It took all her will to hold back a bitter laugh. She’d been young. An utter fool controlled by her emotions. Controlled—and destroyed.
Memories started to flow. Images of faces she hadn’t allowed herself to recall for years.
No. Stop!
She gritted her teeth, forcing the scenes away, back into the recesses of her mind. Berto was in the past. She was done with him. With the mistakes. With being a fool.
Tears slipped free, despite her best efforts to restrain them. Fine, let them fall. But she wasn’t giving way to the memories. Not for a second. They were over and done with. That the merest hint of them made her cry only firmed Kyla’s resolve.
Nothing would ever hurt her like that again.
NINE
“All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them.”
G ALILEO
“Lord, when doubts fill my mind, when my heart is in turmoil, quiet me.”
P SALM 94:19 (TLB)
K yla, I didn’t mean to hurt you. Please, don’t cry.”
Mason’s voice, so remorseful, so
astonished
, gripped her, making it hard to choke out words. “I’m sorry. Oh, Mason. I’m so sorry.”
At her wretched whisper, gentle hands closed on her arms. She let him pull her close against his chest, cradle her there, stroke the back of her head. “It’s all right, Kyla. It’s all right.”
His voice was familiar again, even and calm. She burrowed her face into his chest. “Mason, what’s
wrong
with me?”
He slid an arm around her shoulders and led her back inside. They sat on the couch, his arm still around her. She leaned into him. If only she could close her eyes and erase the evening. The day. The month.
The year.
“Are you really so unhappy?”
She snuffled against him. “I don’t know. I’m just so … weary.”
“I’ve seen that, for weeks. Maybe even months.” His arm tightened, as though to shelter her. “I’ve been worried about you.”
She pulled back at that and looked up at him. “You have? But you never said anything.”
The smile that tugged at his lips was as ironic as it was brief. “Would it have done any good?”
They both knew the answer to that.
“Kyla.” Lines appeared in his forehead, and she could tell he chose his words with care. “Have you ever considered—” He looked away. “No, never mind.”
Kyla tugged at his shirt front. “What?”
“It’s not fair of me to even suggest it.”
She watched the play of emotions on his face, disquiet wrestling with deference. Kyla’s heart warmed. She really didn’t deserve this man. “Mason, please. Tell me. What’s on your mind?”
“Why don’t you just give it up?”
Her lips twitched. “What? Stress?
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