blush spreads across my face
anyway. I think he loves embarrassing me. He buys stamps and I watch as
he drops the letter to my Mom in the mail slot.
We head back to the cabin and I pay attention to where we are now and how we
get to and from the cabin. He glances over at me knowing I can leave and
find my way. I won’t. I want to help him. My Mom will know
that I’m okay and I will be home soon.
We
unpack the car and put the groceries away. Ryan sits down in the chair with a
newspaper he bought. I grab the box of hair color and look at the
directions. I’ve never colored my hair before and I am so nervous. I
start to think I should cut it as well. I need to look different. My face
is all over the news, although the pictures they chose are not great. I
disappear in the bathroom with the box and look for some scissors. Not
the greatest but they’ll work. I pull my long hair into my fist. I
close my eyes and open them again. Before I can think anymore, I cut
it. I pull my hand away holding about six inches of hair. Looking
into the mirror, I feel my eyes start to burn with salty tears. My hair
is hacked right up to my shoulders. It’s shocking. I can’t even
remember my hair ever being this short. I do my best to trim it up until it
looks decent. I even give myself a long bang. It’s amazing how the cut
changes the shape of my face. I open the tubes of color and mix according
to the directions and massage it at the roots, having to rest now and
then. My arm is still sore. I spread the color to my ends.
Tears are rolling my down my face now. I don’t recognize myself
anymore. I sit on the toilet crying into my hands until I think twenty
minutes have passed. I bend over the sink to rinse, condition and rinse
again. I brush it out, grab the eyeliner and mascara I bought and try to
change the look of my eyes. I don’t usually wear a lot of make-up so it
makes a huge difference. The reflection in the mirror is no longer
me. If I don’t even recognize myself, I guess I did a good job. I take a
deep breath and walk out of the bathroom.
Ryan
turns around in the chair and then puts his newspaper down. He can tell
I’m upset. He walks over and studies me. “Wow. You look
totally different. I didn’t think you were going to cut it.” He takes a
piece of my hair and rolls it in his fingers before letting it go. “I
can’t believe you did this for me.”
“For
us.”
“I
like it.” Then he smiles at me.
It’s
a panty soaking smile. It lights up his whole face and makes his blue
eyes sparkle. His hair is so long and the scruff on his face covers his
features but I’m undeniably attracted to him.
“Thanks.
Are you hungry? I can make us soup while you start a fire?”
“Are
you okay?”
“Yeah.
I’m okay.” He nods his head.
“Soup
sounds good. Do you like wine?”
“Yes!
Why?” I could use a drink. I could really use a drink!
“Gramps
must have too. I found his stash. Reds and whites. I’m not a wine
drinker but I’ll open a bottle and have some with you.”
“Mmmmm….that
sounds so good.” I say with my eyes closed. When I open them, Ryan has a
look of hunger in his eyes. “You look at me sometimes like I’m a
cheeseburger.” This time the words actually leave my mouth.
He
studies me a minute with that tongue doing that thing again! “That’s
because the sounds you make sometimes…I don’t know.” He shakes his head
running his thumb over his scruff. “They fucking make me crazy.”
I
don’t know what to say to that and the look in his eyes makes my belly flop so
I smile and head towards the kitchen to cook our soup. As the soup is heating
on the stove, my mind drifts off. I think about how my heart
flutters every time Ryan looks at me with his piercing blue eyes. I think
about how comfortable I feel around him. He makes me feel safe. I think about
the wetness between my
anyway. I think he loves embarrassing me. He buys stamps and I watch as
he drops the letter to my Mom in the mail slot.
We head back to the cabin and I pay attention to where we are now and how we
get to and from the cabin. He glances over at me knowing I can leave and
find my way. I won’t. I want to help him. My Mom will know
that I’m okay and I will be home soon.
We
unpack the car and put the groceries away. Ryan sits down in the chair with a
newspaper he bought. I grab the box of hair color and look at the
directions. I’ve never colored my hair before and I am so nervous. I
start to think I should cut it as well. I need to look different. My face
is all over the news, although the pictures they chose are not great. I
disappear in the bathroom with the box and look for some scissors. Not
the greatest but they’ll work. I pull my long hair into my fist. I
close my eyes and open them again. Before I can think anymore, I cut
it. I pull my hand away holding about six inches of hair. Looking
into the mirror, I feel my eyes start to burn with salty tears. My hair
is hacked right up to my shoulders. It’s shocking. I can’t even
remember my hair ever being this short. I do my best to trim it up until it
looks decent. I even give myself a long bang. It’s amazing how the cut
changes the shape of my face. I open the tubes of color and mix according
to the directions and massage it at the roots, having to rest now and
then. My arm is still sore. I spread the color to my ends.
Tears are rolling my down my face now. I don’t recognize myself
anymore. I sit on the toilet crying into my hands until I think twenty
minutes have passed. I bend over the sink to rinse, condition and rinse
again. I brush it out, grab the eyeliner and mascara I bought and try to
change the look of my eyes. I don’t usually wear a lot of make-up so it
makes a huge difference. The reflection in the mirror is no longer
me. If I don’t even recognize myself, I guess I did a good job. I take a
deep breath and walk out of the bathroom.
Ryan
turns around in the chair and then puts his newspaper down. He can tell
I’m upset. He walks over and studies me. “Wow. You look
totally different. I didn’t think you were going to cut it.” He takes a
piece of my hair and rolls it in his fingers before letting it go. “I
can’t believe you did this for me.”
“For
us.”
“I
like it.” Then he smiles at me.
It’s
a panty soaking smile. It lights up his whole face and makes his blue
eyes sparkle. His hair is so long and the scruff on his face covers his
features but I’m undeniably attracted to him.
“Thanks.
Are you hungry? I can make us soup while you start a fire?”
“Are
you okay?”
“Yeah.
I’m okay.” He nods his head.
“Soup
sounds good. Do you like wine?”
“Yes!
Why?” I could use a drink. I could really use a drink!
“Gramps
must have too. I found his stash. Reds and whites. I’m not a wine
drinker but I’ll open a bottle and have some with you.”
“Mmmmm….that
sounds so good.” I say with my eyes closed. When I open them, Ryan has a
look of hunger in his eyes. “You look at me sometimes like I’m a
cheeseburger.” This time the words actually leave my mouth.
He
studies me a minute with that tongue doing that thing again! “That’s
because the sounds you make sometimes…I don’t know.” He shakes his head
running his thumb over his scruff. “They fucking make me crazy.”
I
don’t know what to say to that and the look in his eyes makes my belly flop so
I smile and head towards the kitchen to cook our soup. As the soup is heating
on the stove, my mind drifts off. I think about how my heart
flutters every time Ryan looks at me with his piercing blue eyes. I think
about how comfortable I feel around him. He makes me feel safe. I think about
the wetness between my
Similar Books
