close. Which is why three days after the impromptu Rock Band night, I found myself staring at her contact in my phone.
I stared for ten minutes, disgusted with myself for how hard it was, before making the call. Sam answered right away, almost like she had been sitting there waiting for it. I don’t know why I was nervous when I asked her to meet me for lunch; Sam was the nicest person I knew. She wouldn’t hold a grudge and she certainly wouldn’t turn me down out of spite or retribution. My sister had always been the type of person who saw the best in people, even if they didn’t deserve it. So I don’t know why I was surprised when she (enthusiastically) agreed to lunch, but I was.
Even as I sat there in the half-crowded restaurant I found it hard to believe this was happening. I glanced toward the door, excitement and dread warring in the pit of my stomach. After not seeing her in six months and only briefly talking to her in that time, I was more than ready to see her again. But how would I feel when I did? Would the guilt crowd out everything else? Whenever I thought of my mother I only felt pain; I didn’t want that same feeling to follow me whenever I thought of my sister too. Maybe staying away had only made that worse.
I had just turned back around when the waitress walked by for the third time. She glanced at the empty chair across from me and offered me a sad smile before walking away again. My sister was never late, but she was also never inconsiderate enough to blow someone off. But maybe that had changed since I last saw her, maybe—
“Gabe?” The voice was a little tentative but a whole lot excited.
I slowly stood up and turned around, and what I saw nearly knocked me on my ass. I was staring at my mother. She had the same shoulder-length brown hair that held a slight wave, the same deep brown eyes, and the same light-up-the-room smile. My chest pinched with a slight pain at the resemblance.
“Gabe!” Sam’s voice was firm this time as she enveloped me in a hug that erased the last six months.
“Hey, sis.” My reply was hoarse and low as I pulled back and looked into her eyes. “You look…”
“I know.” Her smile was resigned as we both took our seats and awkwardly looked between our menus and each other, offering nervous smiles whenever our eyes met. The server came and went, and before we knew it we had nothing to do but to talk.
“How have you been? I tried calling a couple days ago.”
I cleared my throat and shifted in my seat. “I know, I’m sorry. I’ve just been busy.”
“It’s okay. I’m just glad you called back. I’ve really missed you.” Sam also never had a problem laying it all out on the table.
I looked down and closed my eyes. “I know you probably won’t believe me, but I really missed you too.”
Sam’s hand found mine, forcing my eyes back open. When our gazes met I found tears in her eyes. “Of course I believe you.” A few seconds later she lifted her hand and took a drink of water before sitting back in her seat.
“What about you?”
“I’m really good. I started taking some college-level courses offered by the high school and I’m already pretty optimistic about them.” She smiled proudly.
“That’s great to hear. What classes are you taking?”
“They’re all pretty basic so it’s nothing too impressive, but—”
“Hey, it’s a start. You can’t ace the harder subjects if you don’t understand the basics.” My voice was stern and somehow despite all the heartache of the past year and the missed opportunities, I just fell right back into big brother-mode. It almost felt like I’d never left. Her eyes were bright and happy as she looked at me, and it seemed she was thinking the same thing.
“Yeah,” she whispered, her tone thoughtful and optimistic. “You’re right… I forgot how smart you are.”
“Maybe…” I paused and took a deep breath. “Maybe we can fix that.”
Sam’s smile was so wide it
I stared for ten minutes, disgusted with myself for how hard it was, before making the call. Sam answered right away, almost like she had been sitting there waiting for it. I don’t know why I was nervous when I asked her to meet me for lunch; Sam was the nicest person I knew. She wouldn’t hold a grudge and she certainly wouldn’t turn me down out of spite or retribution. My sister had always been the type of person who saw the best in people, even if they didn’t deserve it. So I don’t know why I was surprised when she (enthusiastically) agreed to lunch, but I was.
Even as I sat there in the half-crowded restaurant I found it hard to believe this was happening. I glanced toward the door, excitement and dread warring in the pit of my stomach. After not seeing her in six months and only briefly talking to her in that time, I was more than ready to see her again. But how would I feel when I did? Would the guilt crowd out everything else? Whenever I thought of my mother I only felt pain; I didn’t want that same feeling to follow me whenever I thought of my sister too. Maybe staying away had only made that worse.
I had just turned back around when the waitress walked by for the third time. She glanced at the empty chair across from me and offered me a sad smile before walking away again. My sister was never late, but she was also never inconsiderate enough to blow someone off. But maybe that had changed since I last saw her, maybe—
“Gabe?” The voice was a little tentative but a whole lot excited.
I slowly stood up and turned around, and what I saw nearly knocked me on my ass. I was staring at my mother. She had the same shoulder-length brown hair that held a slight wave, the same deep brown eyes, and the same light-up-the-room smile. My chest pinched with a slight pain at the resemblance.
“Gabe!” Sam’s voice was firm this time as she enveloped me in a hug that erased the last six months.
“Hey, sis.” My reply was hoarse and low as I pulled back and looked into her eyes. “You look…”
“I know.” Her smile was resigned as we both took our seats and awkwardly looked between our menus and each other, offering nervous smiles whenever our eyes met. The server came and went, and before we knew it we had nothing to do but to talk.
“How have you been? I tried calling a couple days ago.”
I cleared my throat and shifted in my seat. “I know, I’m sorry. I’ve just been busy.”
“It’s okay. I’m just glad you called back. I’ve really missed you.” Sam also never had a problem laying it all out on the table.
I looked down and closed my eyes. “I know you probably won’t believe me, but I really missed you too.”
Sam’s hand found mine, forcing my eyes back open. When our gazes met I found tears in her eyes. “Of course I believe you.” A few seconds later she lifted her hand and took a drink of water before sitting back in her seat.
“What about you?”
“I’m really good. I started taking some college-level courses offered by the high school and I’m already pretty optimistic about them.” She smiled proudly.
“That’s great to hear. What classes are you taking?”
“They’re all pretty basic so it’s nothing too impressive, but—”
“Hey, it’s a start. You can’t ace the harder subjects if you don’t understand the basics.” My voice was stern and somehow despite all the heartache of the past year and the missed opportunities, I just fell right back into big brother-mode. It almost felt like I’d never left. Her eyes were bright and happy as she looked at me, and it seemed she was thinking the same thing.
“Yeah,” she whispered, her tone thoughtful and optimistic. “You’re right… I forgot how smart you are.”
“Maybe…” I paused and took a deep breath. “Maybe we can fix that.”
Sam’s smile was so wide it
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