Unusual Uses for Olive Oil

Unusual Uses for Olive Oil by Alexander McCall Smith

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Authors: Alexander McCall Smith
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family motto,
Truth Always
.
    Frau Benz hesitated, but only briefly. ‘Thank you, Moritz-Maria, thank you. And please, I should be delighted if you were to address me as Kitty.’
    ‘I shall be honoured to do so,’ said von Igelfeld, thinking how fitting the name seemed. ‘Kitty.’
    They talked for a few minutes more before he glanced at his watch and told his hostess that it was time for him to go. ‘Perhaps I could reciprocate by taking you to dinner,’ he said. ‘Would you by any chance be free tomorrow evening?’
    She would, she said. And so the arrangement was made; they would meet at a French restaurant that vonIgelfeld had heard was very good and in line for the imminent award of a Michelin star. ‘Stars are best appreciated before they come out,’ he said.
    Frau Benz looked thoughtful. ‘That is a very engaging utterance,’ she said. ‘I shall have to think about its meaning. I suspect that it has many layers.’
    ‘Like some Viennese cakes,’ said von Igelfeld quickly.
    They both laughed. The conversation had been brilliant, and it was entirely fitting that it should end on such a sparkling note.
    He rose to leave. He had taken his jacket off – for the heat – and Frau Benz noticed that the sleeves of his shirt were curiously jagged. Perhaps it is the fashion, she thought; one of her nephews had rips in the knees of his jeans and she had been astonished to learn that the trousers had been bought that way and were often more expensive than those that did not have such tears. And here was Professor von Igelfeld, although no teenager, with shirt sleeves that looked as if they had been roughly cut with a pair of blunt scissors. Strange, she thought; very strange.
    ‘Your driver will be waiting?’ she asked.
    Von Igelfeld was momentarily nonplussed. He had given no consideration to the question of how he would get home, having dismissed the taxi without making any arrangements for its return. ‘My driver …’ he muttered.
    ‘I can ask mine to run you back,’ said Frau Benz. ‘I think he’s still around somewhere. I’ll call him.’
    ‘That will not be necessary,’ said von Igelfeld hurriedly. ‘Mine will be parked outside the gate, I believe.’ He paused. ‘Under a tree.’
    ‘Very wise,’ said Frau Benz. ‘Cars get so hot in the summer, don’t they? Even good cars, like Mercedes-Benzes.’
    Frau Benz smiled as she spoke, and von Igelfeld felt puzzled. There was something humorous, almost teasing, in what she said; but what was it?
    ‘I do not particularly care for Mercedes-Benzes,’ he said offhandedly. ‘There are many other German cars that are every bit as good – and less flashy, if I might say so.’
    Frau Benz stood quite still. For a few moments she said nothing. Then she opened her mouth and said, ‘Oh?’
    ‘Yes,’ said von Igelfeld, searching his mind for something witty to say. ‘I prefer a car that is less overstated. A Mercedes-Benz is fine for
nouveau riche
people, but for others, well, something less … less
shiny
is more appropriate. Or to have no car at all. That is the most fashionable choice, I believe.’
    Frau Benz was silent, but had von Igelfeld looked at her, he would have noticed a slight quivering of the chin.
    ‘No,’ he continued expansively. ‘I have no time for Mercedes-Benzes. None at all.’
    Frau Benz moved very slowly towards the door. ‘It was so kind of you to come, Professor von Igelfeld,’ she said.
    ‘Please: Moritz-Maria, Kitty.’
    She appeared not to have heard. ‘And I much appreciated your kind remarks about the ceiling, Professor von Igelfeld.’
    Von Igelfeld felt his neck becoming warm. He wondered whether he had done something to offend his hostess; he must have – but what could it be? He looked down at his arms, at the shirt he had converted to short sleeves. Could it be that this amounted to some awful social solecism?
    Frau Benz was opening the door.
    ‘I look forward to our dinner,’ said von Igelfeld, a note of

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