Unforced Error by Michael Bowen Page A

say I was ‘absolutely certain’ about anything. Things happen that we don’t understand. Fatima, Lourdes. The time-space continuum bending in on itself. ‘Absolutely certain?’ I guess not.”
    â€œNow, suppose someone told you that he was sitting in the bleachers on the Capitol steps last inauguration day and he saw Laura Bush smoking a cigar while her husband was being sworn in. Would you believe him?”
    â€œNo, of course not.”
    â€œNeither would I,” Melissa said. “Would you be absolutely certain he was wrong?”
    â€œThat’s a trick question,” Rep protested.
    â€œWhy?”
    â€œWell, it’s not the same thing. I mean, yeah, I would be as close to absolutely certain as you could be. It’s not the kind of thing that would happen at all, much less happen and be ignored by everyone who had to have seen it except one guy.”
    â€œRight,” Melissa said. “It wouldn’t violate any scientific laws, the way a miraculous vision would. But it would violate the laws of human nature.”
    â€œSo what are you saying? That Peter Damon couldn’t have killed a man who seduced his wife?”
    â€œNo. I’m not even sure I could say that about you—not that I expect the question ever to come up.”
    â€œSo who’s Laura Bush in this analogy, and what’s the cigar?”
    â€œPeter didn’t have a breath of a motive unless he at least suspected that Linda had cheated on him with Quinlan.”
    â€œHow do we know he didn’t suspect that?” Rep demanded. “All we know is that Linda didn’t tell him about the fling. He could have spotted Quinlan’s little keepsake and parsed it the same way you did.”
    â€œIf he had suspected infidelity on any grounds, he wouldn’t have gone running off while his wife was in the bathroom, maybe overdosing on something in a paroxysm of remorse. Anyone can see how desperately he loves her. He might have screamed at her or—or any number of things, I suppose. But he apodictically would not have left Jackrabbit Press until he saw with his own eyes that she was physically okay.”
    â€œIf you’re right, then when Peter came down to get his saber he didn’t even suspect Linda had cheated, much less that Quinlan was the guy, and therefore he couldn’t have been planning to kill him. Wait a minute, though. What if he’d noticed the hairs tied to the bolt but didn’t tumble to what it meant until he was five miles down the road?”
    â€œAnd then doubled back to kill Quinlan?” Melissa asked.
    â€œRight.”
    â€œThe timing doesn’t work. Linda and I were only about twenty minutes behind him. If he’d driven off and then backtracked to kill Quinlan, he couldn’t have gotten home, changed clothes, and left before Linda and I got there.”
    â€œFair enough,” Rep said. “Which takes us back to the key question: if it wasn’t jealous rage that sent Peter running off in the first place, what was it? If we can answer that question
and
sell your laws-of-human-nature premise, then what Peter said to me not only isn’t incriminating, it’s almost an alibi.”
    â€œBut the police don’t sleep with me, so they won’t pay any attention to metaphysical speculation borrowed from G. K. Chesterton. Once they get a sharp saber and a whiff of adultery, they’ll stop looking at anything else and work on nailing Peter for the murder. He needs help from someone else.”
    â€œWhich unfortunately can’t be us,” Rep said. “Apart from everything else, there’s the detail that I don’t know any criminal law. I deliberately forgot everything I’d learned about it fifteen minutes after the bar exam.”
    â€œWell,” Melissa said dubiously, “nobody’s perfect.”
    â€œAlthough you come close, beloved. But close doesn’t cut it. We can’t