Lost In Our Darkness (Demons Of Darkness Book 2) by Elizabeth Hayes

wasn't. She would never be better than me. But eventually the feeling of not being good enough would pull me back under until I couldn't function. Make me believe that I wasn't good enough. I closed my eyes as I felt the lingering effect of the coke drift through my body making me want another rail. I opened my eyes, he stared back at me as though he wanted to know what I was thinking. He wouldn't ask though. He never did. Maybe that was our problem. He never asked and I wouldn't explain. I wouldn’t tell him what I was thinking. I didn't want him to see the parts of me that were vulnerable.
    He slid out of me and pulled his pants on, leaving me lying there naked.  He found a rag and tossed it to me. Fuck. I wiped away his cum from between my legs as he cut another line and handed me the mirror. I inhaled the line and leaned back on the couch as I waited for the numbness to come.
    "Get dressed." He tossed me my shirt.
    "Where are we going?"
    "Wherever you want to go."
    I picked my bra up off the floor and put it on before pulling my shirt over my head. My pants were still twisted around my left ankle. I slipped my other leg through the opening and pulled them up. "I need to check on Zaiden."
    "Is he at home?"
    "Yeah, Cheyenne has him."
    "Come back to the clubhouse with me. Spend the night and I'll have someone go get him and Cheyenne in the morning."
    I paused staring at him wondering what he was thinking. "Okay but let me just check in with her first and make sure he's okay."
    He nodded as I searched for my phone. It had fallen out of my pocket and was lying on the floor. I had several missed calls from Payne. Shit. I had forgotten about him. I scrolled through what little contacts I had in my phone until I found Cheyenne’s number and pressed send. I stood up and paced the room as I waited for her to answer.
    "Hey," she answered
    "Hey. So how's Zae?"
    "He's good. Taking a nap right now. Ahh, but Nitro is here and so is Payne. He looks pissed." She whispered the last part.
    "Yeah about that. Can you ah, do you think you can keep him overnight and bring him to the clubhouse in the morning?"
    "Sure thing. But what do you want me to do about this other one?"
    "Just, fuck, um, tell him I'm fine and I'll call him later. I need to take care of some shit and I'm going to stay at the clubhouse tonight. No don’t tell him that, just tell him I'll call him when I can but I'm fine and he should leave."
    "Is that her?" I could hear Payne ask Cheyenne in the background.
    "Okay see you later," she said quickly before hanging up the phone.
    I powered my phone off and slipped it in my pocket.
    "Everything good?" Nix asked as he leaned against the wall smoking a cigarette.
    "Yeah. Let's get out of here." I followed him as we walked through the bar and out back where his bike was. He started it and I hopped on the back wrapping my arms around his waist. Home. It felt like home. A home that I had lost, that may never truly be mine again. I stopped thinking, letting go of those thoughts as I pressed myself against Nix's back and relaxed into him.
     

    We pulled up to the clubhouse. I took the long way back not wanting the feeling of Trix pressed against my back to end. I didn't know what would happen when we walked into the clubhouse together. I didn't care either. But as soon as I saw Venom’s bike I knew he would have something to say. I stopped the bike and kicked the kickstand down as Trix sighed before throwing her leg over the bike and standing next to me. I got off the bike and pulled her to me, wrapping my arm around her shoulder as we walked inside. We didn't stop. We went straight to my room and shut the door. She slipped out from under my arm and took a seat on my bed.
    "I'm going to grab a bottle. You need anything?"
    She shook her head no as she pulled out a pack of cigarettes and put one to her lips. I slipped out the door. Just as I expected Venom was waiting for me.
    "Got something you want to say?" I asked him.
    "Not sure