boldly drove toward the shore for her eight-thirty lesson, she watched the
sun begin to rise, casting a coral glow across the surface of transient clouds.
Not until these excursions to the beach, did she fully appreciated the sunrise.
A new day. Possibilities. She had to give herself permission to live even if
that meant living through loss. She held tightly to the hope that there was
something on the other side of grief.
Early
for the lesson, Kira pulled into her usual spot. She spotted the brown-haired
surfer in his black wetsuit, Ian already seated on the wall. He glanced in her
direction, gave her a wave, and sauntered up to the passenger window.
“You’re
back.” He studied her for a moment. “You look different.” She brought her
fingers to what she was sure were dark circles under her eyes. “Lighter,” he
added. “But I don’t mean pale.” A grin hitched its way up the corners of his
mouth revealing his hidden dimples. “Did you just come back from a vacation?”
“Something
like that.”
“Are
you getting in the water today?”
Kira
looked at the waves, mellower than other days, but still the wild, churning
sea. “Actually, yes.”
Ian
raised his eyebrows. “Sweet.”
“I
have a surfing lesson scheduled for eight-thirty.” An unfamiliar wavering in
her stomach told her not to reveal that she’d selected him for her instructor,
if he was available.
“Excellent.
First time?”
Kira
nodded.
“You’ll
love it.” He gazed out to the shore. “It’s always a good idea to watch the
waves before you go out. Get a sense of what kind of mood the ocean’s in.” A
couple surfers pulled up in a rusty Chevy on the other side of the Mercedes.
“Bro,”
one called. “Suited up. Gonna throw some buckets?” He laughed. “Come on, I’m
frothin’. Dude.”
Ian
nodded as they quickly took their boards off the roof of the car.
“Hey,
have fun,” he said to Kira, tapping the edge of the door. Then, he trotted
across the sand, joining the other guys, glancing back at Kira and flashing his
irresistible smile.
Kira
replaced Ian’s spot on the wall and watched. The surfers paused and strapped
something around their ankles. Without hesitating, they plunged into the frigid
water. She tried to pick Ian out of the crowd that had assembled out past the
breaking waves, but they appeared like little dots bobbing in the water. She
watched as the figures paddled, got to their feet, and rode along the breaking
waves. A good number fell off their boards, and then the churning foam slapped
them around. She wasn’t sure that she wanted to be one of them.
Kira
steadied herself as she wavered between thoughts of Oh my goodness what have
I agreed to do? To, I can do this. I can live. She took a deep
breath.
The
sun warmed her shoulders when she took her shoes off and put her feet in the
sand. She told herself that baby steps were better than none at all. One foot
in front of the other. She encouraged herself forward as she made her way to
the water’s edge. The waves danced around her feet. She looked at her toes
through the trickling water. The path of least resistance. The water flowed up
around her ankles. She stood firm. The sand bolstered her feet. She became the
water’s obstacle. It wasn’t hers. A surfer glided toward her on a wave. As he
came into focus, it was Ian, his face relaxed, looking completely at one with
one with the ocean.
Once
on shore, he snapped up his board. “Made it in this far, eh?” He teased, and
then shook his head, spraying beads of water off in all directions.
Kira
flinched, but his smile pierced any hint of annoyance. Side by side, they stood
facing the ocean.
“Beautiful
day,” he said. “Hey, look there’s Brody, did you see that cutback. Not easy to
do on this mush. Ack. He bailed.”
Kira
looked at him blankly.
“The
wind’s changing, making the waves choppy. It should let up in a bit. So your
lesson?”
Kira
nodded. “At
sun begin to rise, casting a coral glow across the surface of transient clouds.
Not until these excursions to the beach, did she fully appreciated the sunrise.
A new day. Possibilities. She had to give herself permission to live even if
that meant living through loss. She held tightly to the hope that there was
something on the other side of grief.
Early
for the lesson, Kira pulled into her usual spot. She spotted the brown-haired
surfer in his black wetsuit, Ian already seated on the wall. He glanced in her
direction, gave her a wave, and sauntered up to the passenger window.
“You’re
back.” He studied her for a moment. “You look different.” She brought her
fingers to what she was sure were dark circles under her eyes. “Lighter,” he
added. “But I don’t mean pale.” A grin hitched its way up the corners of his
mouth revealing his hidden dimples. “Did you just come back from a vacation?”
“Something
like that.”
“Are
you getting in the water today?”
Kira
looked at the waves, mellower than other days, but still the wild, churning
sea. “Actually, yes.”
Ian
raised his eyebrows. “Sweet.”
“I
have a surfing lesson scheduled for eight-thirty.” An unfamiliar wavering in
her stomach told her not to reveal that she’d selected him for her instructor,
if he was available.
“Excellent.
First time?”
Kira
nodded.
“You’ll
love it.” He gazed out to the shore. “It’s always a good idea to watch the
waves before you go out. Get a sense of what kind of mood the ocean’s in.” A
couple surfers pulled up in a rusty Chevy on the other side of the Mercedes.
“Bro,”
one called. “Suited up. Gonna throw some buckets?” He laughed. “Come on, I’m
frothin’. Dude.”
Ian
nodded as they quickly took their boards off the roof of the car.
“Hey,
have fun,” he said to Kira, tapping the edge of the door. Then, he trotted
across the sand, joining the other guys, glancing back at Kira and flashing his
irresistible smile.
Kira
replaced Ian’s spot on the wall and watched. The surfers paused and strapped
something around their ankles. Without hesitating, they plunged into the frigid
water. She tried to pick Ian out of the crowd that had assembled out past the
breaking waves, but they appeared like little dots bobbing in the water. She
watched as the figures paddled, got to their feet, and rode along the breaking
waves. A good number fell off their boards, and then the churning foam slapped
them around. She wasn’t sure that she wanted to be one of them.
Kira
steadied herself as she wavered between thoughts of Oh my goodness what have
I agreed to do? To, I can do this. I can live. She took a deep
breath.
The
sun warmed her shoulders when she took her shoes off and put her feet in the
sand. She told herself that baby steps were better than none at all. One foot
in front of the other. She encouraged herself forward as she made her way to
the water’s edge. The waves danced around her feet. She looked at her toes
through the trickling water. The path of least resistance. The water flowed up
around her ankles. She stood firm. The sand bolstered her feet. She became the
water’s obstacle. It wasn’t hers. A surfer glided toward her on a wave. As he
came into focus, it was Ian, his face relaxed, looking completely at one with
one with the ocean.
Once
on shore, he snapped up his board. “Made it in this far, eh?” He teased, and
then shook his head, spraying beads of water off in all directions.
Kira
flinched, but his smile pierced any hint of annoyance. Side by side, they stood
facing the ocean.
“Beautiful
day,” he said. “Hey, look there’s Brody, did you see that cutback. Not easy to
do on this mush. Ack. He bailed.”
Kira
looked at him blankly.
“The
wind’s changing, making the waves choppy. It should let up in a bit. So your
lesson?”
Kira
nodded. “At
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