her, really for anyone’s, liking.
“That’s fine,” she says and leans her blonde but also fake hair against the back of the seat and closes her eyes for a minute. That’s fine, she repeats in her mind.
And if she unwittingly set up Leslie and Kevin, that’s fine, too. It’s been a long time since she thought of Kevin that way. And it’s fine, she tries to think, that long before her second martini, she pretty much abandoned any attempt at adhering to the principles of the Zone.
As the taxi makes a hard left onto Seventy-ninth Street, Meredith looks back up Broadway. She can’t see them standing on the street anymore, waiting together for their taxi. She thinks that if she could, if she could not only see them, but also hear them, that she might hear Kevin asking Leslie if she’d like to go to dinner one night soon. Or, maybe he’s leaning over to her right now, and saying, “Hey, maybe this weekend, do you want to go see a movie?”
nine
the detox diet
Ever since she first saw it, Stephanie has always loved the movie She’s Having a Baby , the one that stars Kevin Bacon and Elizabeth McGovern as a young suburban couple. In fact, it’s right up there, along with The Cutting Edge with Moira Kelly and DB Sweeney as one of her all-time favorite films. She’d always thought of DB Sweeney as one of the most underrated actors of his generation. But that’s not exactly what she’s thinking of right now.
She’s thinking of this one scene from She’s Having a Baby. It’s this part where Kevin Bacon, who’s at the time terribly tired of the couple’s baby-having efforts, the charts and the fertility times and the scheduled sex, meets another woman. He meets this woman by the fountain at the Museum of Natural History in Chicago and when he looks at her, he looks at her like he’s going to forget for a while all about Elizabeth McGovern. And then right after that, the very next scene, Kevin Bacon is on the train, heading back to the suburbs and he looks really tired. For the longest time, Stephanie always thought he’d just looked at the woman (who, by the way, happened to be French) standing in front of the fountain and had then turned right around and gotten on his train and gone home to Elizabeth McGovern. It was the longest time she thought that, until someone pointed out to her that, no, he had in fact had an affair. Even though it was all off camera, it still happened. Just because you didn’t see it didn’t mean it wasn’t there. And for a long time, Stephanie had wished she didn’t know that.
“Okay,” Stephanie says out loud to herself, once Ivy has rested her just-burped self, her precious blonde head, down on her shoulder. She tries to make a mental note again not to talk out loud to herself. She thinks there might be something alarming to the trend that has been, for a while now, developing. And so she thinks to herself, rather than saying out loud, I am not going to go on UrbanBaby today. She is sure there is darkness there, in the nameless, faceless lines of pink and green text. And she’s sure spending all that time lurking in a chat room, even one about babies, staring so long at a computer, it’s so Aubrey-like in its isolation, if you think about it. And at this point, Stephanie would really rather not.
There’s the Junior League of Ridgewood, she’s considering looking into that. There’s the New Mommy Group that she’s already part of and just needs to make an effort to like more. She missed the last meeting, she really shouldn’t have; if she’s learned anything from all her years of team sports it’s that you show up. No matter what. You show up and you play. By the rules. She’s always thought so, and believing in that has always worked out well.
She puts Ivy down in her crib, and Ivy stays down and Stephanie takes a moment to be happy for that. She wants to have a moment in which she’s aware she’s happy; lately she thinks they’re harder to come by. And also,
“That’s fine,” she says and leans her blonde but also fake hair against the back of the seat and closes her eyes for a minute. That’s fine, she repeats in her mind.
And if she unwittingly set up Leslie and Kevin, that’s fine, too. It’s been a long time since she thought of Kevin that way. And it’s fine, she tries to think, that long before her second martini, she pretty much abandoned any attempt at adhering to the principles of the Zone.
As the taxi makes a hard left onto Seventy-ninth Street, Meredith looks back up Broadway. She can’t see them standing on the street anymore, waiting together for their taxi. She thinks that if she could, if she could not only see them, but also hear them, that she might hear Kevin asking Leslie if she’d like to go to dinner one night soon. Or, maybe he’s leaning over to her right now, and saying, “Hey, maybe this weekend, do you want to go see a movie?”
nine
the detox diet
Ever since she first saw it, Stephanie has always loved the movie She’s Having a Baby , the one that stars Kevin Bacon and Elizabeth McGovern as a young suburban couple. In fact, it’s right up there, along with The Cutting Edge with Moira Kelly and DB Sweeney as one of her all-time favorite films. She’d always thought of DB Sweeney as one of the most underrated actors of his generation. But that’s not exactly what she’s thinking of right now.
She’s thinking of this one scene from She’s Having a Baby. It’s this part where Kevin Bacon, who’s at the time terribly tired of the couple’s baby-having efforts, the charts and the fertility times and the scheduled sex, meets another woman. He meets this woman by the fountain at the Museum of Natural History in Chicago and when he looks at her, he looks at her like he’s going to forget for a while all about Elizabeth McGovern. And then right after that, the very next scene, Kevin Bacon is on the train, heading back to the suburbs and he looks really tired. For the longest time, Stephanie always thought he’d just looked at the woman (who, by the way, happened to be French) standing in front of the fountain and had then turned right around and gotten on his train and gone home to Elizabeth McGovern. It was the longest time she thought that, until someone pointed out to her that, no, he had in fact had an affair. Even though it was all off camera, it still happened. Just because you didn’t see it didn’t mean it wasn’t there. And for a long time, Stephanie had wished she didn’t know that.
“Okay,” Stephanie says out loud to herself, once Ivy has rested her just-burped self, her precious blonde head, down on her shoulder. She tries to make a mental note again not to talk out loud to herself. She thinks there might be something alarming to the trend that has been, for a while now, developing. And so she thinks to herself, rather than saying out loud, I am not going to go on UrbanBaby today. She is sure there is darkness there, in the nameless, faceless lines of pink and green text. And she’s sure spending all that time lurking in a chat room, even one about babies, staring so long at a computer, it’s so Aubrey-like in its isolation, if you think about it. And at this point, Stephanie would really rather not.
There’s the Junior League of Ridgewood, she’s considering looking into that. There’s the New Mommy Group that she’s already part of and just needs to make an effort to like more. She missed the last meeting, she really shouldn’t have; if she’s learned anything from all her years of team sports it’s that you show up. No matter what. You show up and you play. By the rules. She’s always thought so, and believing in that has always worked out well.
She puts Ivy down in her crib, and Ivy stays down and Stephanie takes a moment to be happy for that. She wants to have a moment in which she’s aware she’s happy; lately she thinks they’re harder to come by. And also,
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