The Zucchini Warriors by Gordon Korman

the game he’s going to miss!” She threw open the door and pointed out into the hall. “Now, get lost!”
    Outside the window, Bruno let go of the sill and crouched in the bushes beside Boots. “Guess what, Melvin. You’re the quarterback again.”
    Boots made a face. “Don’t they know how lousy I am?”
    “Oh, sure. But we haven’t got anybody else. Anyway, the important thing is Elmer pulled it off perfectly. Academy Award stuff.”
    * * *
    The Warriors had a rough Saturday. Mark Davies’s scoreboard read GO WORRIERS and that pretty much said it all. Even Bruno’s lucky penny, kissed and rubbed until it was shiny, couldn’t save the home team. On the very first play of the game, Sidney Rampulsky grabbed the ball and ran forty yards in the wrong direction over his own goal line. There he stopped, spiked the ball in triumph, and an opposing player pounced on it for a touchdown.
    Coach Flynn covered his eyes. “When he’s going in the
right
direction,
he falls
!”
    “Somebody should have told me,” said Sidney reproachfully.
    “We couldn’t catch you!” cried Pete.
    Myron Blankenship missed five field goals, and probably would have missed extra points, too, except that Macdonald Hall scored no touchdowns. He did manage to kick the ball holder twice. And for the last play in the first half, he missed the ball and holder altogether, sending his shoe sizzling between the goal posts. The other team applauded wildly. For the first time all year, Myron Blankenship had no comment. Macdonald Hall went to the locker room down 14–0.
    Quarterback Boots O’Neal spent most of the game buried under a large pile of opposing players. After some frantic halftime coaching from Kevin Klapper, the Warriors began to put the offence together a little with some quick hand-offs. They drove all the way to their opponents’ 10-yard line, but then Wrong-Way Rampulsky struck again. This time, however, the Warriors were alert. Larry and Pete tackled Sidney around midfield. There Sidney fumbled, costing Macdonald Hall another touchdown. In fact, the only Macdonald Hall points in the game came when Wilbur and Bruno got tangled up, and the big boy fell backward onto the opposing quarterback in the end zone for a safety. Final score: 21–2.
    It was a much quieter Warriors team that slunk into the locker room after this less than sparkling performance.
    “No grumbling,” said Henry Carson cheerfully. “I don’t want anybody blaming anybody else. It was no one’s fault.”
    “Yeah, we all stank equally,” said Dave Jackson morosely.
    “And those end zones,” Sidney complained. “They look exactly alike!”
    Bruno was devastated. “I can’t believe it,” he said to the coaches. “You had such faith in us, and we let you down.”
    “Every team has to get a bad game out of its system,” said Coach Flynn in a shaky voice.
    “I wouldn’t say that,” said Kevin Klapper brightly. He produced a clipboard. “Last week we had thirty-six points scored against us; this week, only twenty-one. And they had the ball most of the game. Good work, defence.” Half the team brightened. “And, sure, the offence didn’t score, but we were pretty confused with our regular quarterback out. And at the end, a few of those ground plays were starting to click. All in all, this was a positive experience. Remember — as soon as a game is over, it may as well have happened ten thousand years ago. But next week’s game is always only five minutes away.”
    Larry Wilson spoke up. “But you won’t be with us next week.”
    Klapper looked mystified. “I won’t?”
    “Your job,” Larry replied. “The Ministry needs you at another school, right?”
    Klapper frowned. Why was it that, in the middle of the most exciting, stimulating and essential talk about football, someone kept bringing up the Ministry? “Oh,” he said casually, “my work here isn’t progressing as quickly as I’d expected, so I’ll be here for at least another