would see her and feel nothing. But, like a recovering alcoholic catching sight of a bottle of whiskey, one look was all it took.
Damn it!
After she’d left, it took years before Felix could get through a day without thinking of her. He’d spent months replaying their last meeting, in his head. Over and over, he had analyzed each word spoken and evaluated each gesture in an attempt to find an answer as to why she had gone. Now he feared the whole self-flagellation would start up again.
Walk away, Felix. Turn around and walk. Go back to your life and away from her.
But he didn’t.
He couldn’t.
Instead, he remained transfixed. How different she looked. Nea was thinner, tired… sad.
Was Tore right? Had she pined for him?
Felix shook his head as he tried to gain control of his emotions. No, he couldn’t let this happen. He had his medical studies to finish. He didn’t need this distraction. There was no sane reason to let Nea step back into his life. Yet, as he looked into her deep brown eyes, he was unable to obey his head. His heart was speaking louder and it begged him to stay and hear what she said.
Don’t listen to your heart, Felix. She broke it once, she will do it again. Walk away while you still can.
The breeze wafted her scent to his nostrils. The sweet nighttime jasmine made him gasp. He groaned, now his senses were conspiring against him. His mind ran amok as he imagined holding her in his arms with his nose pressed against her neck. As if to torment him further, she brushed her hair away from her face and her intoxicating fragrance tumbled towards him once again.
Another growl rumbled deep within his chest as he watched her tuck thick, dark strands of hair behind her ear. He closed his eyes. Memories of sliding his fingers through it filled his head. Felix felt a ghost of it lying across his skin; felt the silkiness in his hands as if it was only yesterday. Her hair soft, so…
His eyes flew open.
Get a grip, Felix. End this.
Nea fidgeted with the hem of her dress. Her eyes pleaded with Felix, begging him to listen. She ran her tongue across her lips as if she was preparing to speak. As her lips parted, Felix looked away. He focused on the shadows on the ground; as he tried to find his strength.
This was over. For heaven’s sake, this had to be done.
Nea closed her lips without saying anything. Her eyes filled with tears as she saw the expression on his face. Felix had a sudden desire to hurt her, like she’d hurt him. He opened his mouth. Cruel words crowded the tip of his tongue.
As his eyes met hers, he saw it before she could hide it from him. The words he’d wanted to fling at her, stuck in his throat. Then he knew, whatever else had happened during those past four years, Nea still loved him.
And he still loved her.
Walking away was not an option. Felix had to try again. His legs regained some of their strength as they took him towards her. Nea’s eyes sparkled with tears as she haltingly stepped closer to him.
They met somewhere in the middle. Who knew which one of them took the most steps. In truth, Felix didn’t care what journey either of them had undertaken. Both were bitter and arduous. As their bodies collided, Felix pulled her into his embrace. Nea wrapped her long slender arms around his neck and he buried his face in her hair. Felix felt drunk on her scent as he inhaled the jasmine and honey,
***
Tore hung back at the car, watching closely as his friends sat in silence. He could sense how hurt Felix was, and Tore hoped the hurt didn’t turn to hatred.
As the silence grew oppressive, Nea began, “I hoped you would see me, prayed that you would allow me to explain.”
“Nea, I…” Felix was desperate for her explanation but he cringed at the thought of knowing.
“There is no easy way to tell you my story. I have no excuse for what happened…” She looked away.
Felix’s heart pounded against his chest. “I can
Damn it!
After she’d left, it took years before Felix could get through a day without thinking of her. He’d spent months replaying their last meeting, in his head. Over and over, he had analyzed each word spoken and evaluated each gesture in an attempt to find an answer as to why she had gone. Now he feared the whole self-flagellation would start up again.
Walk away, Felix. Turn around and walk. Go back to your life and away from her.
But he didn’t.
He couldn’t.
Instead, he remained transfixed. How different she looked. Nea was thinner, tired… sad.
Was Tore right? Had she pined for him?
Felix shook his head as he tried to gain control of his emotions. No, he couldn’t let this happen. He had his medical studies to finish. He didn’t need this distraction. There was no sane reason to let Nea step back into his life. Yet, as he looked into her deep brown eyes, he was unable to obey his head. His heart was speaking louder and it begged him to stay and hear what she said.
Don’t listen to your heart, Felix. She broke it once, she will do it again. Walk away while you still can.
The breeze wafted her scent to his nostrils. The sweet nighttime jasmine made him gasp. He groaned, now his senses were conspiring against him. His mind ran amok as he imagined holding her in his arms with his nose pressed against her neck. As if to torment him further, she brushed her hair away from her face and her intoxicating fragrance tumbled towards him once again.
Another growl rumbled deep within his chest as he watched her tuck thick, dark strands of hair behind her ear. He closed his eyes. Memories of sliding his fingers through it filled his head. Felix felt a ghost of it lying across his skin; felt the silkiness in his hands as if it was only yesterday. Her hair soft, so…
His eyes flew open.
Get a grip, Felix. End this.
Nea fidgeted with the hem of her dress. Her eyes pleaded with Felix, begging him to listen. She ran her tongue across her lips as if she was preparing to speak. As her lips parted, Felix looked away. He focused on the shadows on the ground; as he tried to find his strength.
This was over. For heaven’s sake, this had to be done.
Nea closed her lips without saying anything. Her eyes filled with tears as she saw the expression on his face. Felix had a sudden desire to hurt her, like she’d hurt him. He opened his mouth. Cruel words crowded the tip of his tongue.
As his eyes met hers, he saw it before she could hide it from him. The words he’d wanted to fling at her, stuck in his throat. Then he knew, whatever else had happened during those past four years, Nea still loved him.
And he still loved her.
Walking away was not an option. Felix had to try again. His legs regained some of their strength as they took him towards her. Nea’s eyes sparkled with tears as she haltingly stepped closer to him.
They met somewhere in the middle. Who knew which one of them took the most steps. In truth, Felix didn’t care what journey either of them had undertaken. Both were bitter and arduous. As their bodies collided, Felix pulled her into his embrace. Nea wrapped her long slender arms around his neck and he buried his face in her hair. Felix felt drunk on her scent as he inhaled the jasmine and honey,
***
Tore hung back at the car, watching closely as his friends sat in silence. He could sense how hurt Felix was, and Tore hoped the hurt didn’t turn to hatred.
As the silence grew oppressive, Nea began, “I hoped you would see me, prayed that you would allow me to explain.”
“Nea, I…” Felix was desperate for her explanation but he cringed at the thought of knowing.
“There is no easy way to tell you my story. I have no excuse for what happened…” She looked away.
Felix’s heart pounded against his chest. “I can
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