The Truth by Katrina Alba

me.
    After washing my face, throwing my hair in a messy bun, and changing into my favorite pajamas, I climb into bed. Taking a beloved book off my nightstand, I attempt to read for a while. My brain won’t let me focus on the words in front of me, though. It’s stuck in overdrive.
    I’m not sure if I should confront Grant or not. Technically, I was snooping and I have zero concrete evidence that he has done anything wrong. Somehow, though, I know, deep in my gut, it’s exactly as bad as it looks. There were other times I should have seen it, but I still don’t want to believe it’s true. 
    My brain and my heart are now in an internal battle I might not survive. What would I do without Grant? Other than my career, he is pretty much my whole life. He is the only man I’ve ever loved. He’s had my heart since we met. What I’ve seen tonight ripped my heart right out of my chest.
    Even broken hearted, I love him. I want us to work. I want a family with him—I think. My eyes are so tired and my body feels completely drained from the evening. Unfortunately, I can’t shut down my brain. It rattles on until the exhaustion finally takes hold of me.
    I’m startled awake when someone removes the book from my chest. It’s Grant. “What—what time is it?” I ask groggily.
    “Midnight, you fell asleep reading.” He moves in and pushes a free strand of hair out of my face and behind my ear. Then he kisses me on the forehead before covering me with the duvet. “Get some sleep, beautiful. You look exhausted.”
    “Bad day. Why are you getting home so late?” I ask, trying to keep myself calm.
    “Had a late dinner meeting with Dad.”
    “Everything all right?”
    “Yeah, everything is fine. Get some sleep, babe. I’m going to hop in the shower.” With that, he walks into the bathroom.
    The first thought to cross my mind is why does he need to take a shower right now? Is this going to be my life from now on—suspecting every move he makes? I roll over, snuggling my face into my comforter, and cry silent tears into it until I fall back asleep.
    In the middle of the night, my pager goes off from the nightstand. It’s the hospital. Time to bring a new life into the world.
     

Surprise
    Normally, one of the four doctors in my practice is on call for deliveries on certain days. I have a high-risk patient who I had promised I would be there for her delivery. When she went into labor, the hospital paged me right away.
    April is pregnant with twins, and she has opted to try for a vaginal birth. She begged me to be the one to deliver so I promised her I would make it happen. Of course, I hadn’t counted on being a worn down emotional train wreck when it happened, but such is life. Luckily, for all in involved, I could deliver a baby with my eyes closed and one hand behind my back at this point. Pulling on scrubs and my doctor smile, I’m ready.
    I walk in to check on how things are progressing with April and the babies. The delivery nurse has filled me in on her progress and we are getting close.
    “How are we doing, April?”
    “I’m—I’m—okay.” She strained to speak.
    “I want to discuss the epidural with you, okay? I know you want to forgo it. I respect that. I just want you to know you are getting to the end of the point where we would still be able to give you an epidural. I don’t want to scare you. I just want you to be aware if we don’t do it now, you’re not going to be able to get one. We are getting close to pushing.”
    April looks me dead in the eye before she speaks clear as day. “I want the fucking drugs!” she says through gritted teeth. Childbirth has a way of making even the sweetest women become terrors.
    “Okay. I will get the ball rolling. You keep breathing and if you want, I can send someone in to give you a cocktail until they can do the epidural.”
    “No, just get me the good shit.” I chuckle at the face her husband is making at her words.
    He looks at me frightened and