longer, could it? I had been here … Ancestors, over two months now. My brothers would be on their way. “Not long. Why?” I finished enquiringly.
“My father’s affairs need his attention. I think we will have to leave soon.” He shrugged. “Normally we stay longer.”
“But—” I stopped myself before I could say more. He had to leave sooner or later. So did I. I’d always known that.
He met my eyes again. “I think we may stay a few days more – a week even. But when we go we will not be able to return until next year, spring at the earliest.”
“Spring?” The word leaped from my lips, but again I could not continue. It didn’t matter. It didn’t. I would be gone soon anyway. I looked away from him. Don’t you dare cry, Alexandra!
I cleared my throat and said, “I thought your family only came here for the summer.”
“I can persuade my father to bring us back early. In the autumn and winter we are needed. But we will be able to return in the spring.” He paused. We both looked away.
Then he grabbed my hands. My fingers curled tightly around his as he asked, “Alexandra, do you think you will be here in the spring?”
I took a deep breath, ashamed of the way it shuddered in my chest. “No. I don’t think so.” I could not wish it otherwise. I did not wish it otherwise.
“But if you are still here then, will you meet me? At the first new moon after the thaw?”
I closed my eyes. It’s stupid to make promises. I’ll be gone by then.
Then I felt the warmth of his breath on my face and the moistness of his mouth pressed against mine. I gasped a little in surprise, and as my lips parted his did too – and suddenly I was kissing him back, clutching at him as his fingers buried themselves in the heavy curls of my hair.
“Alexandra…” he said as he eased back. His breath was ragged, and there was despair in his voice. “Promise me. Promise you’ll meet me after the thaw.”
I leaned weakly against his shoulder, blinking to dry my eyes. You won’t be here. He’s lying to himself. You’re lying to each other. You won’t be here.
Finally I lifted my head to meet his gaze. “I promise,” I whispered. “If … I can, I will meet you.”
His face lit with a smile that made my heart pulse wildly, and he kissed me again. I was breathing hard when he let me go, but I tried once more to prepare him. “Gabriel, if I am not here—”
“Then I will know that you have returned home and … and I will be happy for you.” He finished rapidly as though the words were painful, rising to his feet and pulling me with him. “Don’t worry. Come on – it’ll be too dark to walk soon.”
I went with him, trying to convince myself that it would be all right. Gabriel would have long forgotten me by spring anyway. It would all be for the best.
My brothers would be here soon.
PART TWO
CHAPTER NINE
It was a long time before I admitted to myself that my brothers were not coming for me.
I think I had always known it, somewhere inside – known that Zella’s malevolence could not be so easily shrugged off. Although there were things about that night which I could not remember, I knew that something terrible must have happened. Why would my memories have been so blurred, otherwise? Perhaps then, in those first days following the loss of all I had known, I had needed hope more than truth. We all do, at times.
Gabriel left. The weeks passed into months, late summer became autumn and autumn slipped away into winter. Snow fell; I outgrew my clothes and the seamstress had to be called in again. And still they did not come. The cold of that winter was more bitter than any I had known at home. For much of the time I was confined to the house. I did not have the comfort of the earth under my feet. All I could do was sit on what I had come to think of as my window seat and watch the world freeze into white.
The hard, colourless days passed slowly. I grew adept at twisting and pinning up the long
“My father’s affairs need his attention. I think we will have to leave soon.” He shrugged. “Normally we stay longer.”
“But—” I stopped myself before I could say more. He had to leave sooner or later. So did I. I’d always known that.
He met my eyes again. “I think we may stay a few days more – a week even. But when we go we will not be able to return until next year, spring at the earliest.”
“Spring?” The word leaped from my lips, but again I could not continue. It didn’t matter. It didn’t. I would be gone soon anyway. I looked away from him. Don’t you dare cry, Alexandra!
I cleared my throat and said, “I thought your family only came here for the summer.”
“I can persuade my father to bring us back early. In the autumn and winter we are needed. But we will be able to return in the spring.” He paused. We both looked away.
Then he grabbed my hands. My fingers curled tightly around his as he asked, “Alexandra, do you think you will be here in the spring?”
I took a deep breath, ashamed of the way it shuddered in my chest. “No. I don’t think so.” I could not wish it otherwise. I did not wish it otherwise.
“But if you are still here then, will you meet me? At the first new moon after the thaw?”
I closed my eyes. It’s stupid to make promises. I’ll be gone by then.
Then I felt the warmth of his breath on my face and the moistness of his mouth pressed against mine. I gasped a little in surprise, and as my lips parted his did too – and suddenly I was kissing him back, clutching at him as his fingers buried themselves in the heavy curls of my hair.
“Alexandra…” he said as he eased back. His breath was ragged, and there was despair in his voice. “Promise me. Promise you’ll meet me after the thaw.”
I leaned weakly against his shoulder, blinking to dry my eyes. You won’t be here. He’s lying to himself. You’re lying to each other. You won’t be here.
Finally I lifted my head to meet his gaze. “I promise,” I whispered. “If … I can, I will meet you.”
His face lit with a smile that made my heart pulse wildly, and he kissed me again. I was breathing hard when he let me go, but I tried once more to prepare him. “Gabriel, if I am not here—”
“Then I will know that you have returned home and … and I will be happy for you.” He finished rapidly as though the words were painful, rising to his feet and pulling me with him. “Don’t worry. Come on – it’ll be too dark to walk soon.”
I went with him, trying to convince myself that it would be all right. Gabriel would have long forgotten me by spring anyway. It would all be for the best.
My brothers would be here soon.
PART TWO
CHAPTER NINE
It was a long time before I admitted to myself that my brothers were not coming for me.
I think I had always known it, somewhere inside – known that Zella’s malevolence could not be so easily shrugged off. Although there were things about that night which I could not remember, I knew that something terrible must have happened. Why would my memories have been so blurred, otherwise? Perhaps then, in those first days following the loss of all I had known, I had needed hope more than truth. We all do, at times.
Gabriel left. The weeks passed into months, late summer became autumn and autumn slipped away into winter. Snow fell; I outgrew my clothes and the seamstress had to be called in again. And still they did not come. The cold of that winter was more bitter than any I had known at home. For much of the time I was confined to the house. I did not have the comfort of the earth under my feet. All I could do was sit on what I had come to think of as my window seat and watch the world freeze into white.
The hard, colourless days passed slowly. I grew adept at twisting and pinning up the long
Similar Books
