hopping … darning a sock … flying. Those words say it all—the natural laughter, the springing joy, the connection to life’s simplicities, the soaring into a bigger world of love. That was Carol in her life and in her work, so that when she died that summer, on July 16th, 2003, at the age of sixty-eight, all those who knew her or had read her books felt the loss personally.
I wrote immediately to Carol’s family, even when I knew words would be of little use.
Dear all of you in Carol’s family,
Like thousands of others everywhere, I feel devastated by the news of Carol’s death. She and Elma and I were linked in a deeply personal way over many months, and when Elma died in April of last year, it was Carol I thoughtof and wrote to immediately. Her generous reply was to tell me that was exactly what she needed—“a hand to reach out to and hold on to.”
I feel grateful to have shared what I shared with Carol, but what she gave me was always far more.
Please accept my heartfelt sympathy. Sincerely,
Arthur
“Where are my bees? Must I die now? Is this a part of life?” Carol had asked, and she had been answered.
Elma had also asked and been answered.
My turn will come next.
For Emily Dickinson, these are mysteries:
The murmur of a bee
A witchcraft yieldeth me
.
If any ask me why
,
’T were easier to die
Than tell
.
I think now about my own dying much more than I used to. I hope, when it comes, that all those I love will move past darkness into their own light, convinced that I may already have moved into mine, as I feel sure Elma and Carol have moved into theirs. In this, they have been my teachers, forever pointing out “a surprising city over the horizon.”
To this point I had borne Carol and Elma company as best I could on their hard and dangerous journey, but forever falling short of their courage. Truly, they had given their straight account without delay and were now in their spirit room, a place of light and energy, free of pain, a place of love.
What now will I say at my end—that I need more time for love, or that I used the time I was given?
Still is my heart. It is awaiting its hour
Everywhere the lovely earth blossoms forth in spring
And grows green anew! Everywhere, for ever
,
Horizons are blue and bright! For ever and ever
.
Ewig … ewig … ewig …
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
ARTHUR MOTYER was born in Bermuda and now lives in Sackville, New Brunswick. Rhodes scholar, Member of the Order of New Brunswick and Professor Emeritus of English at Mount Allison University, he also wrote the novel
What’s Remembered
.
ELMA GERWIN was active for two decades in literacy initiatives, and she was recognized as one of Canada’s top five educators with a Canada Post Literacy Award. A long-time Winnipeg resident, she was married and had three children. She died in 2002.
CAROL SHIELDS was the beloved and award-winning author of more than twenty books. She died in 2003, leaving behind a husband, five children and twelve grandchildren.
VINTAGE CANADA EDITION, 2008
Copyright © 2007
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review.
Published in Canada by Vintage Canada, a division of Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto, in 2008. Originally published in hardcover in Canada by Random House Canada, a division of Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto, in 2007. Distributed by Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto.
Vintage Canada and colophon are registered trademarks of Random House of Canada Limited.
www.randomhouse.ca
Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication
Motyer, Arthur
The staircase letters : an extraordinary friendship at the end of
life / Arthur Motyer ; with Elma Gerwin &
I wrote immediately to Carol’s family, even when I knew words would be of little use.
Dear all of you in Carol’s family,
Like thousands of others everywhere, I feel devastated by the news of Carol’s death. She and Elma and I were linked in a deeply personal way over many months, and when Elma died in April of last year, it was Carol I thoughtof and wrote to immediately. Her generous reply was to tell me that was exactly what she needed—“a hand to reach out to and hold on to.”
I feel grateful to have shared what I shared with Carol, but what she gave me was always far more.
Please accept my heartfelt sympathy. Sincerely,
Arthur
“Where are my bees? Must I die now? Is this a part of life?” Carol had asked, and she had been answered.
Elma had also asked and been answered.
My turn will come next.
For Emily Dickinson, these are mysteries:
The murmur of a bee
A witchcraft yieldeth me
.
If any ask me why
,
’T were easier to die
Than tell
.
I think now about my own dying much more than I used to. I hope, when it comes, that all those I love will move past darkness into their own light, convinced that I may already have moved into mine, as I feel sure Elma and Carol have moved into theirs. In this, they have been my teachers, forever pointing out “a surprising city over the horizon.”
To this point I had borne Carol and Elma company as best I could on their hard and dangerous journey, but forever falling short of their courage. Truly, they had given their straight account without delay and were now in their spirit room, a place of light and energy, free of pain, a place of love.
What now will I say at my end—that I need more time for love, or that I used the time I was given?
Still is my heart. It is awaiting its hour
Everywhere the lovely earth blossoms forth in spring
And grows green anew! Everywhere, for ever
,
Horizons are blue and bright! For ever and ever
.
Ewig … ewig … ewig …
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
ARTHUR MOTYER was born in Bermuda and now lives in Sackville, New Brunswick. Rhodes scholar, Member of the Order of New Brunswick and Professor Emeritus of English at Mount Allison University, he also wrote the novel
What’s Remembered
.
ELMA GERWIN was active for two decades in literacy initiatives, and she was recognized as one of Canada’s top five educators with a Canada Post Literacy Award. A long-time Winnipeg resident, she was married and had three children. She died in 2002.
CAROL SHIELDS was the beloved and award-winning author of more than twenty books. She died in 2003, leaving behind a husband, five children and twelve grandchildren.
VINTAGE CANADA EDITION, 2008
Copyright © 2007
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review.
Published in Canada by Vintage Canada, a division of Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto, in 2008. Originally published in hardcover in Canada by Random House Canada, a division of Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto, in 2007. Distributed by Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto.
Vintage Canada and colophon are registered trademarks of Random House of Canada Limited.
www.randomhouse.ca
Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication
Motyer, Arthur
The staircase letters : an extraordinary friendship at the end of
life / Arthur Motyer ; with Elma Gerwin &
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