you alone. But not until then!â
He was quivering with fury, but I was past caring myself.
âIâll see you outside, Eric, when youâve finished. Iâll wait in my car.â
I waited an hour for Eric to come out. I had parked up the street this time, close to the restaurant. I was afraid he might duck out the back way, but in due course he emerged. He walked along through the pedestrian mall but I drove round and caught up with him on the other side. I slowed down beside him.
âGo away!â he cried, and I heard the anguish in his voice. âYou heard him. Why are you harassing me?â
âWe need to talk, Eric,â I said. âCome on. Iâll drive you home. Then Iâll leave you alone.â
I leaned over and pushed the door open and he grudgingly got in.
âWhy do you keep pestering me like this?â he said as I drove off.
âBecause you donât know what youâre getting into, Eric.â I tried a more reasonable tone. âThat manâs a thug, and youâre letting yourself get dragged into something which has nothing to do with you. Let him fight his little wars if he wants, but why should you waste your time on him and his group?â
âTheyâre my friends! Theyâve looked after me.â
âSo what? Youâre working for him, arenât you? Youâre earning your pay? You donât owe him anything else! All that talk of fighting the communists is outdated, Eric. Itâs prehistoric!â
âYou have no right to tell me how to live my life!â
âSomebody has to, when you make that kind of mistake. Your fatherâs dead, and soâs your uncle and at least one of your grandfathers. Whether you like it or not Iâm probably the nearest thing you have to a male relative in this country.â
âYouâre only doing it to get close to my aunt! Why did you ask her to come and live with you? That really upset her!â
As Iâd guessed. Why did she have to tell him? I really must have got under her skin.
âLook, I only suggested it so sheâd be able to stay longer.â That was less than the truth, but I wasnât going to tell him that. âShe couldnât stay with the cousins forever!â I took a breath. âAnd besides, whatâs wrong if I am attracted to her? Sheâs a very attractive woman! Donât tell me you object to that!â
He said nothing. For the first time it struck me that he might be a little jealous.
âIn the meantime I think youâre heading straight into trouble with that gang of yours.â
âYou donât know about the communists! They killed my father. They killed my grandfather! My mother died because of them! Donât preach to me about forgiveness!â
Weâd reached his house. I pulled up outside, and tried one more time.
âLook, Eric,â I said more gently. âI understand. But not this way! Theyâre not all like that. And you canât solve the past with more violence. Youâll only end up destroying yourself.â
âTheyâre not thugs! Theyâre my friends, and theyâve done more for me than youâll ever do! Stop pestering me like this! And stop pestering my aunt too. I know what you want! You just want to fuck her! Well go fuck yourself! She doesnât want you, and I donât want you! So piss off!â
He got out of the car, slamming the door behind him. The front door to the house opened and one of the young men looked out, attracted by the noise. With a sinking heart I watched Eric storm inside.
For an ex-spy who was supposed to be good at handling people Iâd made a right mess of things: Eric, Vo Khanh, Mr Bach, even Hao on the personal front. Only Quang stood by me, and only his innate courtesy and the Vietnamese reluctance to make you lose face had stopped him from telling me straight out what a fool Iâd been to go and see Bach.
I knew why I
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