see right through her.
“I don’t know much about you.”
Linnea sighed. She knew what was coming. Now he would want to know everything and would never want to see her again.
“So what’s your favorite color?” he asked, twirling a blade of grass between his lips.
Linnea let out a loud laugh. Color? That’s all he wanted to know? That was easy. She could handle questions like that all day.
“Blue. Like the color of the water in an exotic ocean.”
He laughed. “How do you know about exotic oceans?”
“It’s in a book my Nai Nai reads to us.” Linnea smiled, thinking of their almost-nightly ritual of bedtime stories that she liked to pretend she was too old for but really loved. Most of their stories were old Chinese folktales or legends taken from history, but sometimes their Nai Nai bent to the whims of the latest fads. Just last month Peony and the other girls had been spellbound on the nights they’d read from the famous British series of Harry Potter. Their Ye Ye had scooped the series up from the Chinese knockoff market and, in the last book, they’d all laughed at the Chinese rendition of Harry and his Chinese circus acrobat sidekick named Naughty Bubble, and their adventures traveling to China to track down Chinese Porcelain Doll to stop Yandomort. Her Nai Nai had barely gotten through it without rolling her eyes at the silliness of what she’d called unbelievable sorcery.
“Hmm… you always talk about your Nai Nai. What about your mother?”
Linnea felt a wave of uneasiness. There it was—the question. She had thought she was off the hook, so it hit her like a ton of bricks. But suddenly Linnea was tired of always trying to find excuses or make up lies about her story. For once she wondered what it would feel like if she just said it. What was the worst that could happen? Jet would leave and never come back, and if he did that—then maybe he wasn’t as perfect as she thought anyway.
She sat up and took a deep breath. She looked him straight in the eye.
“My mother left me when I was little.”
Jet looked taken aback and sat up quickly.
“What? Left? What do you mean?”
“Left. Abandoned—whatever word you want to use. It all means the same. She didn’t want me.”
“I’m so sorry. But you don’t live in an orphanage, right?”
Linnea couldn’t hide the sharp intake of breath. To most in China, being abandoned automatically made people think the person lived in an institution. And if they thought someone lived in an institution, many jumped to the conclusion that the person had mental issues. Even the thought of being branded as institutionalized made her feel sick.
Jet cringed. “Never mind, I didn’t mean—”
Linnea held her hand up. “No. It’s not your fault. Let me finish. I’ve never told anyone this and I’m ready to finally say it. My mother didn’t want me. She kept me until I was three years old and then she left me sick and alone in the meat market. A scavenger found me and took me home. He and his wife nursed me back to health and have taken care of me since. He is my Ye Ye and she is my Nai Nai. I’m not proud of my birth story, but it is what it is.”
She lifted her chin proudly. She’d done it. She had told the truth. She silently dared him to say anything about her beloved Ye Ye or try to say he wasn’t a man of honor because of his trade. She knew no other man in theworld could be as kind and loving as her Ye Ye and she was ashamed that she had at first been hesitant to talk of him.
Jet took her hands in his and brought them to his lips. The soft touch of his mouth on her skin sent a shiver all through her.
“Linnea, I don’t care whose daughter you are. I only care about you, don’t you know that? I’m glad you told me so I can share your pain with you. I can see in your eyes when you talk about your mother that she hurt you very badly. You don’t have to carry your sorrow alone. If you let me, I’ll help you carry it.”
Linnea
“I don’t know much about you.”
Linnea sighed. She knew what was coming. Now he would want to know everything and would never want to see her again.
“So what’s your favorite color?” he asked, twirling a blade of grass between his lips.
Linnea let out a loud laugh. Color? That’s all he wanted to know? That was easy. She could handle questions like that all day.
“Blue. Like the color of the water in an exotic ocean.”
He laughed. “How do you know about exotic oceans?”
“It’s in a book my Nai Nai reads to us.” Linnea smiled, thinking of their almost-nightly ritual of bedtime stories that she liked to pretend she was too old for but really loved. Most of their stories were old Chinese folktales or legends taken from history, but sometimes their Nai Nai bent to the whims of the latest fads. Just last month Peony and the other girls had been spellbound on the nights they’d read from the famous British series of Harry Potter. Their Ye Ye had scooped the series up from the Chinese knockoff market and, in the last book, they’d all laughed at the Chinese rendition of Harry and his Chinese circus acrobat sidekick named Naughty Bubble, and their adventures traveling to China to track down Chinese Porcelain Doll to stop Yandomort. Her Nai Nai had barely gotten through it without rolling her eyes at the silliness of what she’d called unbelievable sorcery.
“Hmm… you always talk about your Nai Nai. What about your mother?”
Linnea felt a wave of uneasiness. There it was—the question. She had thought she was off the hook, so it hit her like a ton of bricks. But suddenly Linnea was tired of always trying to find excuses or make up lies about her story. For once she wondered what it would feel like if she just said it. What was the worst that could happen? Jet would leave and never come back, and if he did that—then maybe he wasn’t as perfect as she thought anyway.
She sat up and took a deep breath. She looked him straight in the eye.
“My mother left me when I was little.”
Jet looked taken aback and sat up quickly.
“What? Left? What do you mean?”
“Left. Abandoned—whatever word you want to use. It all means the same. She didn’t want me.”
“I’m so sorry. But you don’t live in an orphanage, right?”
Linnea couldn’t hide the sharp intake of breath. To most in China, being abandoned automatically made people think the person lived in an institution. And if they thought someone lived in an institution, many jumped to the conclusion that the person had mental issues. Even the thought of being branded as institutionalized made her feel sick.
Jet cringed. “Never mind, I didn’t mean—”
Linnea held her hand up. “No. It’s not your fault. Let me finish. I’ve never told anyone this and I’m ready to finally say it. My mother didn’t want me. She kept me until I was three years old and then she left me sick and alone in the meat market. A scavenger found me and took me home. He and his wife nursed me back to health and have taken care of me since. He is my Ye Ye and she is my Nai Nai. I’m not proud of my birth story, but it is what it is.”
She lifted her chin proudly. She’d done it. She had told the truth. She silently dared him to say anything about her beloved Ye Ye or try to say he wasn’t a man of honor because of his trade. She knew no other man in theworld could be as kind and loving as her Ye Ye and she was ashamed that she had at first been hesitant to talk of him.
Jet took her hands in his and brought them to his lips. The soft touch of his mouth on her skin sent a shiver all through her.
“Linnea, I don’t care whose daughter you are. I only care about you, don’t you know that? I’m glad you told me so I can share your pain with you. I can see in your eyes when you talk about your mother that she hurt you very badly. You don’t have to carry your sorrow alone. If you let me, I’ll help you carry it.”
Linnea
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