caught .”
“ Yeah. Okay .” He’d obviously been irritated.
“ Soon, though, David. We’ll meet soon. I promise .” Because if she couldn’t spend time with him, he’d find someone who could.
On the floor in front of her she dumped the contents of a plastic bag. These were the items she would need for the ritual: her makeup, soap, shampoo, lotions, several pieces of jewelry, a hand mirror, and a mister filled with holy water consecrated beneath a full moon. Carefully she placed each of the items on the crate that served as her altar.
She stood then to cast her circle. “ You can never forget to cast your circle ,” Lena had warned, “ or you leave yourself open to negative energy .”
Moving clockwise, Rebekah defined her circle by placing stones on the floor to create a perimeter. Next she placed her elemental representations on the points depicting north, south, east, and west: a jar of dirt for earth, a feather for air, a tiger’s eye gemstone for fire, and a shell for water. As she did so, she pushed back a stray doubt about what she was doing, knowing that the doubt itself would work against her, interfering with what she wanted to accomplish. Once the elements were laid, she used a small broom to brush away any doubts and all negative thoughts; the circle was a sacred place and needed to be pure. To fill the space with positive energy, she opened a jar of salt water coated with rosemary and, dipping her fingers in the mixture, flicked the water around the circle’s edge.
When she finished, she paused a moment, unsure what to do next. She didn’t want to mess up. Sitting cross-legged on the floor, she shut her eyes and pictured Lena. In her mind she heard again what her friend had told her so many times. “ You can’t do anything wrong, you know. That’s the beauty of it. Anything you do is right. Just do what works for you .”
She picked up the mister and sprayed each item on the altar with holy water. Each time she sprayed, as the mist tumbled down upon each object, Rebekah whispered, “The power of beauty in me, around me, on me. The power of love in me, around me, on me.”
She paused and took a deep breath. It was time to center herself. Before she could go on with the ritual, she would have to purify her mind and draw up positive energy from the earth, letting the power sink into every part of her body.
“ You will learn ,” Aunt Jo had told her, “ that you yourself are divine. You are a part of the goddess and the god, the lady and the lord, the universal one. You can do anything .”
Rebekah stood and raised her arms. She shut her eyes and tried to release the nagging doubts, tried to dwell on the divinity within her. She hoped that Lena’s aunt was right and that she could do anything, because losing David would mean losing the best thing in her life.
C HAPTER S EVENTEEN
The cramped church basement smelled of mold and old coffee and somebody’s too-sweet perfume. Eleven people sat in a circle on metal folding chairs, some chatting quietly, a few sitting silently as they waited for the meeting to begin.
John looked down at his hands, clasped loosely at his knees like two people caught in a conversation they didn’t want to be in. Nothing about his body felt right at the moment because he really didn’t want to be here, exposing himself as something he still didn’t like to accept.
He’d grown used to the A.A. meetings in prison, but it had taken a couple of years, mostly because in prison he was struggling to see himself not only as an alcoholic—which he had long denied—but worse, as a criminal. Granted, he was a lousy husband, a second-rate father, and an unreliable provider, but still—how do you go from that to a convicted criminal seemingly overnight? One day you’re holding a low-wage but honest job and the next you’re in the slammer without so much as a clear memory of the events that got you there.
For a long time he refused to put himself on a par with
“ Yeah. Okay .” He’d obviously been irritated.
“ Soon, though, David. We’ll meet soon. I promise .” Because if she couldn’t spend time with him, he’d find someone who could.
On the floor in front of her she dumped the contents of a plastic bag. These were the items she would need for the ritual: her makeup, soap, shampoo, lotions, several pieces of jewelry, a hand mirror, and a mister filled with holy water consecrated beneath a full moon. Carefully she placed each of the items on the crate that served as her altar.
She stood then to cast her circle. “ You can never forget to cast your circle ,” Lena had warned, “ or you leave yourself open to negative energy .”
Moving clockwise, Rebekah defined her circle by placing stones on the floor to create a perimeter. Next she placed her elemental representations on the points depicting north, south, east, and west: a jar of dirt for earth, a feather for air, a tiger’s eye gemstone for fire, and a shell for water. As she did so, she pushed back a stray doubt about what she was doing, knowing that the doubt itself would work against her, interfering with what she wanted to accomplish. Once the elements were laid, she used a small broom to brush away any doubts and all negative thoughts; the circle was a sacred place and needed to be pure. To fill the space with positive energy, she opened a jar of salt water coated with rosemary and, dipping her fingers in the mixture, flicked the water around the circle’s edge.
When she finished, she paused a moment, unsure what to do next. She didn’t want to mess up. Sitting cross-legged on the floor, she shut her eyes and pictured Lena. In her mind she heard again what her friend had told her so many times. “ You can’t do anything wrong, you know. That’s the beauty of it. Anything you do is right. Just do what works for you .”
She picked up the mister and sprayed each item on the altar with holy water. Each time she sprayed, as the mist tumbled down upon each object, Rebekah whispered, “The power of beauty in me, around me, on me. The power of love in me, around me, on me.”
She paused and took a deep breath. It was time to center herself. Before she could go on with the ritual, she would have to purify her mind and draw up positive energy from the earth, letting the power sink into every part of her body.
“ You will learn ,” Aunt Jo had told her, “ that you yourself are divine. You are a part of the goddess and the god, the lady and the lord, the universal one. You can do anything .”
Rebekah stood and raised her arms. She shut her eyes and tried to release the nagging doubts, tried to dwell on the divinity within her. She hoped that Lena’s aunt was right and that she could do anything, because losing David would mean losing the best thing in her life.
C HAPTER S EVENTEEN
The cramped church basement smelled of mold and old coffee and somebody’s too-sweet perfume. Eleven people sat in a circle on metal folding chairs, some chatting quietly, a few sitting silently as they waited for the meeting to begin.
John looked down at his hands, clasped loosely at his knees like two people caught in a conversation they didn’t want to be in. Nothing about his body felt right at the moment because he really didn’t want to be here, exposing himself as something he still didn’t like to accept.
He’d grown used to the A.A. meetings in prison, but it had taken a couple of years, mostly because in prison he was struggling to see himself not only as an alcoholic—which he had long denied—but worse, as a criminal. Granted, he was a lousy husband, a second-rate father, and an unreliable provider, but still—how do you go from that to a convicted criminal seemingly overnight? One day you’re holding a low-wage but honest job and the next you’re in the slammer without so much as a clear memory of the events that got you there.
For a long time he refused to put himself on a par with
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