did.â
âWhat do you mean?â
âTaking off your shirt, your bootsââ
âNoticed that, did you?â he asked with raised eyebrows, and she crossed her arms over her chest. âI understand why your clothes are likeââhe waved a hand at the colored scarf she had tied around her chestââthat. But still, maybe a blush from you? You were old enough to know propriety when you landed here.â
âPropriety?â she spat. âShall I call you Saint Captain or Captain Saint?â
Grant worked to hide his exasperation.
âYes, I was old enough to have learned that. If Iâd been taught what was proper. When I was younger, my mother used to say that nothing limited the human spirit like propriety. She wouldâve called you a sanctimonious killjoy.â
âI am not a killjoy,â he protested before he could stop himself. âI adhere to propriety because itâs the backbone of Britain. Itâs what separates our society from every other one on earth.â He raked a hand through his hair and tried to reason. Of all the things for her to misunderstand or be ignorant ofâthis should not be one of them. âThe rules for propriety didnât simply spring up in a vacuum. They were formed by layers of time and are upheld for a reason.â
She looked at him thoughtfully. âYes, thatâs what Iâll call you. Captain Killjoy.â
He glared at her. She hadnât listened to a bloody word heâd said. âIf identity and propriety mean nothing to you, I wonder if you even want to leave.â
âJust because I didnât run down to the beach to meet you doesnât mean I donât want to leave. Youâve been reading too many castaway stories. And trust me, they have it wrong. When should womenâwhom no one would miss because theyâre believed deadâever run out and greet sailors whoâd been out to sea for months?â
âActually, I believe you were right to be cautious.â He stared into the fire, thinking of the journal, wondering what had become of the captain. âYou never wrote about that captain after Miss Scott hit him.â
Her toe braked her swaying. She sat up, her body rigid. âThatâs because his story was over. He died and we left him there. After a day, when the crew couldnât find him, they spooked and sailed.â Her bearing dared him to criticize her.
âDo you regret anything about it?â He hoped not, but how could a woman not be plagued with nightmarish memories and misgivings? He had her, he was hurting her , sheâd written. I wanted to protect herâI wanted to hurt him. It was as though I lost my mind.
âRegrets? Certainly. I wish we couldâve avoided the entire situation. If not, I wish Iâd brought down the rock instead of Cammy and spared her that.â
Grant barely prevented his eyes from widening, not believing her words. Any woman heâd ever been with would have wrung her hands, waiting for help in the same situation. Not one of them would have launched herself onto a fiendâs back and tried her damnedest to strangle him.
Now, years later, Victoria wished sheâd dealt the final blow. Grant stared at her, at her steady, clear gaze, and for a moment, he was awed by her. He understood and wouldnât want to change her actions, but it was still disconcerting to be around a woman so different from any heâd known. He coughed and said, âI appreciate your caution. You were right to be wary. The pranks, however, I couldâve done without.â
She shrugged and sank back. âThey felt right at the time.â
He was glad the topic had changed âFelt? I suppose you would choose instinct over logic.â
âYou get the same end, only instinctâs quicker.â Her rocking resumed.
Had been glad. Now he wanted to shake her. âHow can instinct help you when you want to plan your
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