The Prada Paradox by Julie Kenner Page B

that perverse sense of humor. I tell myself I’m calming down. That humor is my way of taking control. But I don’t believe it.

    I don’t have any control here. None at all.

    I close my eyes and try to hide inside myself again. Because that, I think, is the scariest part of all.

    Chapter16

    Blake had never felt more helpless in his entire life.

    He’d watched as she read the message. Watched as her face went white and terror filled her eyes. Watched as she’d curled up on the couch, whimpering like a frightened child.

    And then he’d watched, helpless and terrified, as Devi slipped inside herself. He felt lost, impotent, and all he wanted to do was hunt down and kill the bastard who’d done this to her. Since that hardly seemed an option at the moment, he wanted to hold Devi herself. Hold her and comfort her and tell her that it would be okay. That he would never let anything happen to her. That he loved her and that he’d protect her and that if he could erase all the bad stuff between them, he’d do it in a heartbeat.

    He couldn’t say those things, though, any more than he could break the bastard’s neck who’d sucked her into the game. He’d tried. So help him, he’d tried to hold her and pull her close. She’d pushed him away, though, and from the wild terror in her eyes, he knew that he shouldn’t force her. She was straddling memories and reality, her body and mind equally in peril. Her body, he intended to protect with his life. Her head, though…about that, he hadn’t a clue how to help.

    She was terrified. And the truth was, she had reason to be. All he could do was love her, and he’d already seen that loving Devi simply wasn’t enough.

    He knelt in front of her. “Devi,” he whispered.

    No response. He took a deep breath, then took her hands, hers limp in his tight grip. And then he waited. He moved his thumb softly over her skin until, finally, she gripped back. At that moment, Blake was sure his heart would explode. He could do this. He could protect her.

    But then, when she lifted her head and looked at him, her eyes pleading, the bubble burst, and he was lost again. Lost and grasping.

    “Devi,” he said. “Baby, I—”

    “No.” The word was whispered, barely even voiced. But he heard it, and he felt the pain behind it.

    “Sweetheart, we’ll get through it. We can—”

    “What?”she demanded, and although the fear in her eyes etched deep into his soul, the fire in her voice gave him hope. “What can we do?”

    “We can fight. Devi, we can do whatever it takes.”

    She shook her head, looking at him almost pityingly. “Blake, someone is trying tokill me. Someone has fuckingpoisoned me. It’s not a movie. It’s not even a game. It’s real. And it scares the shit out of me.”

    He watched, helpless, as her shoulders shook and tears ran down her face. She’d blown whatever courage she’d manage to collect, and now she was collapsing again, lost in a nightmare that she’d never expected. He wanted to believe that the well would fill again. That she would remember how much she loved the life she had, and how much he knew she wanted to fight for it.

    He wanted to believe that, but he didn’t know if he could. She’d been injured so badly already, and after fighting the battle once, he wasn’t certain that she’d want to fight it again.

    No matter what, though, he was there to fight it with her. He’d see her through this, whether she wanted his help or not.

    He wanted to tell her all that. Hell, he just wanted to tell her that he loved her. But the words wouldn’t come. Instead he moved silently to the couch and pulled her into his arms. She didn’t hesitate this time, and that probably scared him most of all. Because the strong woman he’d fallen for—the woman who hadn’t hesitated to kick his ass out her door—was disintegrating in front of him.

    That reality broke his heart. It also pissed him off.

    And once he got his hands on the bastard who was behind this, that man was surely going down.

    At