The Order of Odd-Fish by James Kennedy

and nodded, everyone sat down, and he began, “Welcome home, Odd-Fish! It’s a relief to have almost everyone back at the lodge—”
    “Hear, hear!” shouted the knights and squires.
    “It’s been a difficult year,” said Sir Oliver. “Money’s been tight, as usual. I won’t dwell on the woes of the past months—including, of course, that this lodge was stolen—”
    “Boo! For shame!”
    “And for three months we’ve had nowhere to live. Now, before we start the feast, I will tell you this: in my search for the lodge, I
did
discover who had stolen it—”
    A general gasp around the table—
    “But I won’t tell you who until after dessert,” said Sir Oliver.
    “No!” came the protests. “Tell us now!”
    “You will need a full stomach,” said Sir Oliver firmly. “I will say no more. On to happier matters. We also have back in Eldritch City, after a thirteen-year exile, Dame Lily Larouche, Colonel Anatoly Korsakov, and Sefino—as well as a new addition to the Order of Odd-Fish, Dame Lily’s niece and squire, Jo Larouche.”
    Jo flinched as all eyes turned to her, and she looked down, embarrassed. Nobody was staring at her the horrified way Korsakov and Sefino had; still, she was relieved when Sir Oliver spoke again and attention shifted away from her.
    “You squires never knew Dame Lily, Colonel Korsakov, or Sefino personally, of course—a bit before your time—but I trust everyone shall make both our new and returning Odd-Fish welcome. I see our soup is becoming tepid. Let the feast begin!”
    The cockroaches descended from all sides, bearing soup. Jo was starving, and luckily, the chunky, purple soup was delicious, with a mild pork-plum flavor. Glimpsing to the side, Jo noticed that Sir Oliver’s costume prevented him from moving his arms, and a cockroach had to feed him, spoonful by spoonful, as though he were a baby.
    Aunt Lily sat on Jo’s right. She seemed like an entirely different woman now; or no, Aunt Lily was somehow more
herself
than she had ever been in Dust Creek. Her voice was clear, her body shimmered with renewed health, and even a few wrinkles seemed to have disappeared. It was as though Aunt Lily had grown up.
    “So…what do knights do?” Jo asked.
    “Oooh, tons,” said Aunt Lily over the noise. “There are quite a few orders of knights in Eldritch City, each with their own traditions and missions. The Order of Odd-Fish’s mission is to research an encyclopedia.”
    “An encyclopedia?”
    “The appendix to an encyclopedia, actually,” said Sir Oliver as a cockroach held a spoonful of soup near his mouth. “The project of writing an encyclopedia of
all
knowledge was abandoned centuries ago, but we’re still writing its appendix. It is a pleasantly futile task. Our archives take up the entire fifth floor—we’re adding new information all the time. For instance, Dame Lily might be amused to know that there’s now an entry on
her
in the Appendix.”
    “Really!” said Aunt Lily. “What’s it say?”
    “It says you’re dead.”
    “What!”
    “Probably should change that in the next edition,” said Sir Oliver.
    “It doesn’t sound like much of an appendix,” said Jo.
    “Oh, it’s usually wrong,” admitted Sir Oliver.
    “But the Appendix isn’t known for its accuracy,” said Aunt Lily. “Accuracy isn’t the point.”
    “‘It is an Appendix of dubious facts, rumors, and myths,’” recited Colonel Korsakov. “‘A repository of questionable knowledge, and an opportunity to dither about.’ That’s from our charter,” he said to Jo. “The bit about dithering is the most important. We are a society of ditherers.”
    “Dithering?” said Jo.
    “You know—fiddling about, puttering, loafing. The Order of Odd-Fish has a long and distinguished history of dithering. Sir Oliver is the world’s foremost authority.”
    “Oh, I wouldn’t say that!” protested Sir Oliver.
    “He wrote a six-hundred-thousand-page dissertation on dithering,” said