and without arguing. People will notice this when you are less reluctant to give in to their wishes and when you never sacrifice your convictions for the opinions or wishes of others.
While personal development and growth are both admirable and desirable, most males feel the need to change themselves for women, but you should never have to change your true self forwomen to get them. If you do, it is not really
you
that is getting girls, but some alternate persona.
The only situation in which it may
seem
appropriate to pretend to be someone you are not is if you believe you are unattractive to women and normally act that way. It may appear that you have to pretend to be someone you are not to be confident, charming, and responsible, but one of my main points in this book is to show you that you were once attractive to women, and you would have stayed that way had it not been for your socialization. If you are unsuccessful with women, it is not because you are being yourself, but the opposite.
To have an unyielding personality includes being able to say “no” to women when they ask you for something that you
only
would consider to agree to because a pretty face is asking, and you would never allow yourself to be persuaded otherwise. This includes being dragged up on stage to sing or dance if you do not feel like it. It also includes refusing to be treated as a home improvement project by your girlfriends.
Some females like to see their male as an incomplete human being, and they try hard to change him into what they honestly do
believe
is better, only to find that once they have gotten their way they are puzzled because they are no longer attracted to him. At first, it does not appear to make sense. They should like him even more after all of the changes, yet they find that they do not and neither do they have any idea why that is. Even more puzzled is the male in the relationship who has given up all his hobbies, mates, habits, and opinions just as she asked, only to find himself single again “despite” all the sacrifices he made for the female.
This phenomenon is only a phenomenon if you do not understand that the male’s unyielding personality turned out to be not so unyielding after all. He did not become less attractive
despite
his sacrifices, but
because
of them. He was obviously not as sure of himself as she first thought; he was not very confident after all since he changed himself so much.
Men who are good with women do not change themselves for women; they never even consider it, and they certainly do not fear losing women, as it is not confident to worry about things. Not only do they expect to get away with their selfish and shameless behavior, but they also expect women to yield to them as they are unyielding themselves. Basically, they are optimistic.
OPTIMISTIC
To be optimistic means to have positive expectations, and your expectations are your mental predisposition of how you will handle
uncertainty
. It is about whether you believe the future will unfold in your favor or not, and to be confident with women, it is best to adopt positive expectations whenever you interact with them.
All men who are successful with women have such positive expectations, or at least they act like they do. But most males are pessimistic when it comes to women and thus have negative expectations, sometimes even assuming the worst. They overreact and immediately think that they have been stood up if a woman has not arrived exactly on time for a date, and they quickly become jealous if she as much as mentions other males. However, the worst males never get that far. As soon as they lay their eyes on a woman, they assume she has a boyfriend already, that he must be better than they are, that she would never be interested in them, that she would even be upset if they approached her, and that they will fail, so there is no point in even trying. If they do try, their low expectations become known by the way that they present
While personal development and growth are both admirable and desirable, most males feel the need to change themselves for women, but you should never have to change your true self forwomen to get them. If you do, it is not really
you
that is getting girls, but some alternate persona.
The only situation in which it may
seem
appropriate to pretend to be someone you are not is if you believe you are unattractive to women and normally act that way. It may appear that you have to pretend to be someone you are not to be confident, charming, and responsible, but one of my main points in this book is to show you that you were once attractive to women, and you would have stayed that way had it not been for your socialization. If you are unsuccessful with women, it is not because you are being yourself, but the opposite.
To have an unyielding personality includes being able to say “no” to women when they ask you for something that you
only
would consider to agree to because a pretty face is asking, and you would never allow yourself to be persuaded otherwise. This includes being dragged up on stage to sing or dance if you do not feel like it. It also includes refusing to be treated as a home improvement project by your girlfriends.
Some females like to see their male as an incomplete human being, and they try hard to change him into what they honestly do
believe
is better, only to find that once they have gotten their way they are puzzled because they are no longer attracted to him. At first, it does not appear to make sense. They should like him even more after all of the changes, yet they find that they do not and neither do they have any idea why that is. Even more puzzled is the male in the relationship who has given up all his hobbies, mates, habits, and opinions just as she asked, only to find himself single again “despite” all the sacrifices he made for the female.
This phenomenon is only a phenomenon if you do not understand that the male’s unyielding personality turned out to be not so unyielding after all. He did not become less attractive
despite
his sacrifices, but
because
of them. He was obviously not as sure of himself as she first thought; he was not very confident after all since he changed himself so much.
Men who are good with women do not change themselves for women; they never even consider it, and they certainly do not fear losing women, as it is not confident to worry about things. Not only do they expect to get away with their selfish and shameless behavior, but they also expect women to yield to them as they are unyielding themselves. Basically, they are optimistic.
OPTIMISTIC
To be optimistic means to have positive expectations, and your expectations are your mental predisposition of how you will handle
uncertainty
. It is about whether you believe the future will unfold in your favor or not, and to be confident with women, it is best to adopt positive expectations whenever you interact with them.
All men who are successful with women have such positive expectations, or at least they act like they do. But most males are pessimistic when it comes to women and thus have negative expectations, sometimes even assuming the worst. They overreact and immediately think that they have been stood up if a woman has not arrived exactly on time for a date, and they quickly become jealous if she as much as mentions other males. However, the worst males never get that far. As soon as they lay their eyes on a woman, they assume she has a boyfriend already, that he must be better than they are, that she would never be interested in them, that she would even be upset if they approached her, and that they will fail, so there is no point in even trying. If they do try, their low expectations become known by the way that they present
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