The Less Than Perfect Wedding

The Less Than Perfect Wedding by Sam Westland

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Authors: Sam Westland
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The front door to our apartment was closed, fortunately - at least the muggers who had kidnapped my fiance had been kind enough to make sure that we wouldn't be robbed just before our wedding.
    I slid my key into the door and unlocked it. When I stepped inside, however, I was greeted by a totally unexpected sight.
    *
    I had expected my apartment to be empty, now that Alex had been kidnapped. However, I saw as the door opened, this was not the case.
    My apartment was full of people! My mother was sitting at one end of the couch, and Judy was at the other. Sally was sitting straight up in one of the chairs from the dining room table. Claire was lounging against one of the walls, grinning at me like a fox.
    "What's going on?" I asked, taking a couple steps into the apartment and dropping my bag of work and papers down on the little bench beside the front door. "What are you all doing here?"
    "Why, we're here for your bachelorette party, of course!" Claire told me, her grin stretching ear to ear. "We heard that Alex had been kidnapped for his party, and so we figured that since he got one, it would only be fair that you also get one last night to see what the single life is like!"
    Sally and Judy both nodded to this statement. My mother rolled her eyes, but she didn't speak out against what my best friend was saying, which meant that either she secretly agreed and didn't want to admit anything, or she had already been brow-beaten into temporary submission.
    "This is really kind of you all," I began, still seeing visions of my relaxing glass of wine dancing before my eyes, "but I really don't know if I'm up to it tonight. I've been spending so much time working on planning this wedding lately that I feel completely exhausted."
    Claire nodded. "And that is exactly why we're here!" she insisted. "You need to be distracted from all that - and what better way to distract you than to go out for one last taste of the single life?"
    I tried another couple of tactics to argue my point, but I already knew that it was useless - Claire was determined to get me out, and there wouldn't be any changing her mind. She clearly had already made plans for what we would be doing that night. And a tiny voice in the back of my head was telling me that it had been a long time since I had last really gone out to just have fun, and didn't I deserve one night off from worrying about the wedding? Sure, I wouldn't be spending it alone and relaxing with wine and maybe a warm bath, but how many more opportunities would I get to go out and just have fun? Claire was doing her best to convince me, but I was also convincing myself, inside my head.
    "Fine," I eventually agreed. "Let's go out."
    "Oh, but we can't!" Judy spoke up, standing up from the couch and rushing forward. "At least, not with you looking like that! Girl, this is your bachelorette party - you need to look the part!" Her hands seized my shoulders, spinning me around and pushing me towards the bedroom. The other women stood up and followed behind like an impromptu escort.
    In the bedroom, Judy deposited me down on my bed, and she and Claire began ransacking my closet. After a few minutes, they settled on a rather audacious sparkling gown, bright purple and covered with a liberal amount of sequined decoration around the bust and hips. I grimaced as soon as I saw the thing. I had purchased it for a gala event that was purple-themed, over a year ago now, and had steadfastly refused to wear the thing ever since.
    "Oh, no," I groaned when I saw what they had selected. "Please, don't make me wear that thing!"
    "You're protesting? Perfect! That means that we made the right choice!" Claire chuckled as they held the garment out towards me. I opened my mouth to protest once more, but Claire cut me off before I could get a word out. "Come on, you know that it's useless to argue right now. Just put it on so that we can all head out!"
    Shooting one last scowl at Claire and Judy, both of whom grinned back

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