Christmas.”
“How about you, Jenny? When are you blowing this joint?”
“Dr. Gallagher says that my blood work looks good, but that he wants to make certain I can fight off any other infection before he releases me.”
“I’m sure it won’t be much longer,” Elaine replied. “Now that you’re in remission, they’ll get you out of here as soon as possible.”
“Not soon enough,” Jenny said. She felt as if the pneumonia setback had stalled her life and she couldn’t get it moving again.
“Can you believe I’m actually looking forward to getting back to school?” Elaine exclaimed.
“Me too.” Kimbra flopped into a nearby chair. “Anything beats lying around this place.”
Jenny knew she wouldn’t be returning to school for the start of the term. When she’d mentioned it,her grandmother had said, “I would never allow you to leave the house so soon. I’ll hire you a tutor to keep you on grade level.”
“But I don’t want to lie around doing nothing,” Jenny had cried.
“Going to school with so many possibilities of your getting sick again is out of the question. You’ll have a private tutor. You’ll keep up with your classmates, but there’s no sense in taking foolish chances with your health.”
Jenny had appealed to Dr. Gallagher, but surprisingly, he endorsed her grandmother’s plans. “Wait until after the first of the year,” he told her. “After you complete your outpatient therapy. You’ll be stronger, and we’ll have a better idea as to the course of your illness.”
She started to argue, but realized it would be futile. Perhaps they were right. Maybe by the beginning of January, she’d be completely recovered. Her hair would have had time to grow out, and by then, maybe she wouldn’t look like such a freak. Resigned to having her life once again manipulated by cancer, Jenny told herself to be patient and wait out her recovery without complaining.
Elaine left that afternoon amid hugs and tears. Kimbra returned home two days later. “Don’t forget me!” Jenny begged Kimbra while her parents were packing her things and checking her out.
Kimbra gave Jenny a one-arm hug. “What are you going to do about Richard?” Kimbra asked, pulling away and motioning toward the photo of Richard sitting on the bedside table.
“What’s to do? Grandmother said he’s returned to Princeton for the semester.”
“You should have let him come up to see you.”
“I talked to him on the phone and promised to see him when he comes home for the holidays. And naturally, we’ll keep writing each other.”
“Why are you being so stubborn?”
“Why are you asking so many questions? You don’t even know him.”
Kimbra glanced away. “Maybe not, but I feel sorry for him.”
“Why?”
“Because he cares about you and you won’t do anything about it. Do you know what I’d give to have a boyfriend?”
Jenny shook her head. “If only it were true. No … Richard’s only a friend. I came to grips with that a long time ago.”
“But you love him, don’t you?”
Jenny colored. “The Jenny I used to be loved him. But I was different then. I was well. Now that I’m sick, loving someone, burdening someone with my life, seems unfair.”
Kimbra stepped backward, looking incredulous. “That’s one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard pass your lips, Jenny Crawford! Are you saying that sick people shouldn’t fall in love?”
Jenny felt flustered. “I’m saying Richard has a regular life and doesn’t need me messing it up. He always looked out for me when we were growing up, but now it’s my turn to look out for him. I know that girls are crazy about Richard. I know he can have any one of them he wants. He shouldn’t be stuck with me out of some sense of family loyalty.”
“You might give him a say,” Kimbra counseled.
“Maybe if I stay in remission, I will.” Jenny patted Kimbra’s shoulder. “Don’t keep your parents waiting. Go have a life.”
“I’ll
“How about you, Jenny? When are you blowing this joint?”
“Dr. Gallagher says that my blood work looks good, but that he wants to make certain I can fight off any other infection before he releases me.”
“I’m sure it won’t be much longer,” Elaine replied. “Now that you’re in remission, they’ll get you out of here as soon as possible.”
“Not soon enough,” Jenny said. She felt as if the pneumonia setback had stalled her life and she couldn’t get it moving again.
“Can you believe I’m actually looking forward to getting back to school?” Elaine exclaimed.
“Me too.” Kimbra flopped into a nearby chair. “Anything beats lying around this place.”
Jenny knew she wouldn’t be returning to school for the start of the term. When she’d mentioned it,her grandmother had said, “I would never allow you to leave the house so soon. I’ll hire you a tutor to keep you on grade level.”
“But I don’t want to lie around doing nothing,” Jenny had cried.
“Going to school with so many possibilities of your getting sick again is out of the question. You’ll have a private tutor. You’ll keep up with your classmates, but there’s no sense in taking foolish chances with your health.”
Jenny had appealed to Dr. Gallagher, but surprisingly, he endorsed her grandmother’s plans. “Wait until after the first of the year,” he told her. “After you complete your outpatient therapy. You’ll be stronger, and we’ll have a better idea as to the course of your illness.”
She started to argue, but realized it would be futile. Perhaps they were right. Maybe by the beginning of January, she’d be completely recovered. Her hair would have had time to grow out, and by then, maybe she wouldn’t look like such a freak. Resigned to having her life once again manipulated by cancer, Jenny told herself to be patient and wait out her recovery without complaining.
Elaine left that afternoon amid hugs and tears. Kimbra returned home two days later. “Don’t forget me!” Jenny begged Kimbra while her parents were packing her things and checking her out.
Kimbra gave Jenny a one-arm hug. “What are you going to do about Richard?” Kimbra asked, pulling away and motioning toward the photo of Richard sitting on the bedside table.
“What’s to do? Grandmother said he’s returned to Princeton for the semester.”
“You should have let him come up to see you.”
“I talked to him on the phone and promised to see him when he comes home for the holidays. And naturally, we’ll keep writing each other.”
“Why are you being so stubborn?”
“Why are you asking so many questions? You don’t even know him.”
Kimbra glanced away. “Maybe not, but I feel sorry for him.”
“Why?”
“Because he cares about you and you won’t do anything about it. Do you know what I’d give to have a boyfriend?”
Jenny shook her head. “If only it were true. No … Richard’s only a friend. I came to grips with that a long time ago.”
“But you love him, don’t you?”
Jenny colored. “The Jenny I used to be loved him. But I was different then. I was well. Now that I’m sick, loving someone, burdening someone with my life, seems unfair.”
Kimbra stepped backward, looking incredulous. “That’s one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard pass your lips, Jenny Crawford! Are you saying that sick people shouldn’t fall in love?”
Jenny felt flustered. “I’m saying Richard has a regular life and doesn’t need me messing it up. He always looked out for me when we were growing up, but now it’s my turn to look out for him. I know that girls are crazy about Richard. I know he can have any one of them he wants. He shouldn’t be stuck with me out of some sense of family loyalty.”
“You might give him a say,” Kimbra counseled.
“Maybe if I stay in remission, I will.” Jenny patted Kimbra’s shoulder. “Don’t keep your parents waiting. Go have a life.”
“I’ll
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